Psychotherapy & Workshops. Specializing in seggsuality, addiction & relationships. By appointment.🌳
(1)
16/12/2025
Time to reflect…
How do you support and love the people you care about? Is it transactional? Is it reciprocal? Is it manipulative? Or is it unconditional?
Take a moment and reflect on how the people that say they love and care for you show up. Is it the way you would like it to be?
🧡🧡🧡
15/12/2025
On this Magic Monday in Nairobi, please remember those you know who could struggle during the Holidays and do your best to support them.
🩵🩵🩵
11/12/2025
I talk a lot about green flags but nearly not enough on red flags 🚩, the reason being is that if you know what you would like in a person you are more likely to make healthier choices when it comes to relationships. The challenge comes when you meet someone and they “tick all your boxes” however the more you spend time with them you realize patterns of behavior that are not healthy.
Here are some red flags to look out for and if you notice some of these, please take a pause, especially if they are love bombing you - in the first few weeks or months. And, even though you may have known this person from before, people change, so take the time to get to know who they are now.
Usually, in the first 3-6 months (honeymoon phase) we want to show the best versions of ourselves; during this time if you look carefully, you will notice patterns of behavior and these will show you who the person really is, not what they want you to see or what you would like to see in them.
Love built on panic is not love. Healthy love is steady, involves honest, open and proactive communication, respects boundaries and respects independence. Have you experienced any of these red flags 🚩 before?
💜💜💜
10/12/2025
It’s so good to be back after an amazing break away. Spending time with my big brother was so special. 🥰🥰🥰
With the holidays around the corner here are some helpful tips on coping with difficult relatives and even family friends. Remember, just because someone is family, doesn’t give them the right to treat you poorly. Everyone deserves respect. So if you have made someone feel uncomfortable at family gatherings please stop 🛑 and if you have experienced discomfort at family gatherings please speak 🗣️ up for yourself.
Do you have any more tips to share?
Have a beautiful day ahead.
💛💛💛
29/11/2025
Taking a short break as will be working through the Holidays this year. 🫶🥳🌞
Stay awesome, amazing and know that someone out there is glad that you exist.🥰🫶🌹
Back on the 10 December and until then lots of love to you and yours wherever you are.
🤍🤍🤍
27/11/2025
Today I am sharing a post that talks about seggsual coercion and it can sometimes sound like this…
“If you really loved me, you'd have seggs with me."
"You're making me feel bad by saying no."
“You're my partner, so you should want to have seggs."
"I spent so much money on you, the least you can do is...".
“I'll break up with you if you don't."
"I'll tell everyone what happened."
“I'll hurt myself if you don't say yes.”
“Don't be such a prude."
"It's too late to say no now.”
"You're being selfish."
"I can't help myself" when you say no.
If any of these statements resonate - whether you have used them on someone or heard them from someone else, understand that it is wrong to pressure someone to have seggs with you and you are also not obligated to have seggs with anyone you don’t want to. True Consent is given voluntarily and is enthusiastic. Seggs is also a responsibility for all parties involved, whether you are in a relationship or not. NO is also a complete sentence.
💜💜💜
26/11/2025
This post today is a credit to a special human who said these words to me when I was having trouble dealing with something personal. These words rung true and reminded me what I knew deep within too.
So I’m sharing this today as maybe it may help you with changing your mindset around something you are dealing with too.
“Remember that people constantly show you who they are and we all know that people almost never change unless they have a near end experience”. Focus on what someone does and not what they say, behavior and actions will tell you everything you need to know about them and their character.
Have a lovely day ahead.
💚💚💚
25/11/2025
Imagine if we measured success by how safe people (or even animals) feel around us?
Today take a look within and ask if you are the kind of person that others would feel safe to be around…and if the answer is no, ask yourself why and work towards being a better human. There is much unlearning and re-learning we can all do, as just because we have been that way, doesn’t mean we have to stay that way.
Have a lovely day.
💛💛💛
24/11/2025
Do you have an anxious heart that sometimes makes you do things or feel things out of survival when it comes to relationships?
An anxious attachment refers to the intense fear of abandonment and a constant craving for closeness and reassurance. This results in a "roller coaster" of emotions, driven by hypervigilance for signs of rejection, and can lead to behaviors like clinginess, people-pleasing, or creating drama to test the relationship. This is a defense mechanism learned from inconsistent caregiving in childhood, which can be overcome with self-soothing, communication, and building internal security. An anxious attachment style is not something that you have to live with and you can be more secure.
Here are some non-negotiables that can allow you to heal your anxious heart so that you can feel more secure in your connections.
💜💜💜
20/11/2025
Did you know there are other ways to talk to people that you care about, other than asking them how they are? Here are a few phrases that you can use as an alternative. Try them out and see the difference it can make in your relationships.
In a world where texting and online messaging has become the norm, reach out and call the very people you care about instead. And, please don’t use text or online messaging for serious conversations, you cannot see someone’s body language or hear their tone; so talk to them instead.
Save this post for later and have a beautiful day ahead.
💜💜💜
19/11/2025
Saw an amazing post by UN Women Australia and had to share part of their caption today, with an added few too. A huge THANK YOU to all the men who:
🩶Understand the meaning of feminism.
🩶Praise kindness over toughness.
🩶Share the load.
🩶Show other men what respect looks like.
🩶Understand consent.
🩶Choose equality every day.
🩶Are in the therapy space.
🩶Allow others to feel safe.
I see you, you matter. 🖤🩶
Happy International Men’s Day!
18/11/2025
Trigger warning: There are times when “no contact” is necessary because not everyone we are dealing with have good intentions. Use discernment in using the no contact method because communication only works when all parties are willing to understand each other and take accountability for their behavior, acknowledge it, get help and work on changing it. Any kind of abuse is not love. There is never a justification for physical violence and in violent relationships partners may feel that it is their fault that they are treated in this manner. Please remember that this is not your fault. They abused you because they are an abuser, not because they couldn’t control themselves. If you are in an abusive relationship, please reach out to a professional, as you do not need to suffer in silence, and although it may seem bleak at first, you can get out and you do deserve a life that is free from any kind of violence. Be safe out there.
Be the first to know and let us send you an email when Almond Tree Wellness Center posts news and promotions. Your email address will not be used for any other purpose, and you can unsubscribe at any time.
About Cathy Holden and the Almond Tree Wellness Center, Kenya
Before I went to University; I started out not knowing what my life’s purpose would be, but knew it had to do with helping people be their very best version of themselves. I was fortunate enough to study in the United Kingdom and pursued two degrees; back to back; a BSc in Psychology and an MSc in Occupational and Organizational Psychology. I then ended up working in Human Resources in the UK and then moved back to Kenya after 15 years. I carried on working in Human Resources and by 2018 (after 13 years in HR practice) I felt that I needed a change so that I can impact more people by helping them directly. I then took on a new post graduate degree to be a certified S*x Therapist (Therapy Certification Association, based in Miami, Florida).
S*x is in integral part of any relationship and human s*xuality is vast; Do we always know what to do with our s*xuality? Do we know enough about it? These are all questions I kept asking myself for many years, which led to me opening a new business in 2019 - The Almond Tree Wellness Center based in Nairobi, with my office in Doctor’s Park, on 3rd Parklands Avenue, about 100 meters from Aga Khan Hospital.
S*x Therapy is not a new field but while I was growing up, s*x was not something that people talked about freely and I have made it my purpose to help people understand what s*x therapy is about, what a s*x therapist does (and does not do) and how it can help you and/or your partner. There is much more to say on this type of therapy and I am looking forward to sharing my knowledge and expertise with all of you.
I am a member of the Kenya Counselling and Psychological Association and the British Psychological Society. I provide a range of counselling and s*x therapy services and looking forward to meeting and helping as many people as possible.