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anna.luca.toth, Mexico, Puerto Vallarta (2025)

05/01/2025

01.01.2025 What has changed in last year?

“And if we focus on this moment,
bring the fragments of the darkness into light…”

Asked for some new job opportunities which brought me more joy and fun into my life.
I didn’t expect I would land in a “garage” with a bunch of crazy, dirty guys.
This idea that I will study car mechanics as crazy as when I used to study nautical and celestial navigation. But it brought me joy and new adventures.
Somehow I stuck in this workshop and now I buy old cars to repair and cruise at nights.
This place it’s not really special but I wait every evening to get there to screw a bit. It’s like meditation for me.
I have realised that in Mexico when we had some fight with my ex boyfriend. I had to pull back to my room to repair some old fans. It switched off my mind and calmed me down.

28/07/2023

27.07.2023 Dance

I came here to change my life. Which is actually changed. Not as I expected. I supposed to stop dancing, but I had to acknowledge it wasn’t my reality. I wanted to make other people happy, to make real other people’s point of views. But my reality says dancing is fun. I can being myself when I dance. I play around with energy as a powerful witch, I invite people to have fun, enjoy themselves and change the world around us. Matt taught me how to run ESB during my dance which makes more fun and more energy to me. This energy makes my skin spotless and fresh, makes my body glowing. It makes me more energetic and vibrant.
And I also realised I don’t like to work, I just like to have fun, be around and get money for that. Previously I did the same in my Beauty Salon but I bought the point of view that I have to spend there tones of times to get money. Month by month I asked for more free time, more fun, and more money.
Nowadays I creat this life. I got a dancer job at the clubs down on the main Street, at Malecón. I have to dance around 2 hours or less to get almost the same salary at back home. I enjoy the day time and also have time to sleep well at night and wake up around 8 am or 9 am.
I am so grateful for me that I made the choice to do something else than back home. I remind myself to choose ease and joy everyday because it’s possible.
Anything you ask for is possible just ask for it. Ask for what works for you and makes you more happy than you ever imagined.

07/07/2023

06.07.2023 Wish comes true

And the air was full of various storms and saints…Maybe I've always been more comfortable in chaos…

My wishes are actualized with incredible speed. Other day I had a wish, that I would like to sit in huge car like an Escalade although I knew there’s not much here in Vallarta. I wasn’t so attached to the this idea. I just wanted to try a huge car which is tall as me. And two days ago my wish came true. My friend invited me to Boca Tomaten to watch the Cocodrilos and listen some Banda music so he picked me up by car.
Well I’m speechless. This car is just tall as me.
How can I actualise my wishes as fast as possible?
What I observed:
- it wasn’t meaningful
- it didn’t matter how could it appear
- I forgot about it immediately
- I wasn’t attached to it

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05/07/2023

04.07.2023. Dog days are over

What am I gonna do?
I have opened the door, now it's all coming through, I opened my eyes and it's changing the view.

I think I found my peace at the other day. I took stock of my events of my past days.
Time has slowed down and also runs so fast in the mean time.
I don’t know time as I knew back in Hungary. I don’t really follow the days, and hours. I just wake up sometime, do my job, enjoy the view from the rooftop in the morning, or take a bath in the sun set. I have some promenades at the malecón, stop to watch the kids playing or the dogs running around with the birds. And I can tell non of a moment is boring. I am so grateful for the sweet rain, what turns the jungle into a vibrant green. White birds showers in it, resting on top of parasols.
I wish for more and more, greater and greater things.
Other day my friend lost my parasol,so I had to discover some new beaches for shades. But this new adventure brought me new ideas which led me to the local “wizard club”. On Monday I decided to choose a Bars Session course here in PV to become a Bars trainer, and that has made all the difference. Because the magic begun. I didn’t have the money for the course at that moment. But the choice brings the money. It just two days since I made the choice to attend next week, but I almost have the whole amount. How does it get any better than this?

I had my first bars session in Puerto Vallarta. I met wonderful people with different stories but all of them want to creat more and their being is a wonderful gift for this world. They are ordinary heros. One of them (I think) a dog whisperer at the root of the jungle who also speaks in the language of colours. The other one able to make other people’s lives easier with her mere presence. She found her strength and confidence in her being. That inspires me, and encourages me to just be who I am, with no definition.

I am so grateful for these people around me 🙏

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27/06/2023

26.06.2023. Receive help

I felt so bad, that I couldn’t speak Spanish fluently at all. (Although my position here at the hostel is to manage everything.)
Today I was very tired. I just lay almost all day. Morning in the bed, afternoon at the beach. I had time to think and pop some questions.
What is good for me at I can’t speak spanish?
I discovered, that I speak Spanish in the street, at the shops when I have to, but not in the hostel mainly if somebody around who speaks much better than me. I ask for help.
That is the conclusion:
I realised, I am able to ask for help: I make phone calls and be around but ask for translation. I ask for help to take down the garbage to the corner, to change the water jugs. (And it’s not about, that I am not able to do alone. I am able, but I don’t have to do it alone.)
I acknowledged that I also can receive help.

I’ve noticed that I’m showing off less. I feel less and less that I have ti prove anything. I tell you it’s really uncomfortable, because sometimes my brain wakes up and shouts out loud “ oh no, we’re invisible, we do not even exist, do something!”
Sometimes it is quite difficult for me to ignore it and have ease with being.

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25/06/2023

24.06.2023 Trust

“Just handle what’s in front of you now, and the future will take care of itself.”
Is the life what I wished for?

Today I started to feel grace eventually.
I experience here a different type of trust. For example: when you get in the bus you have to pay $10 pesos, the bus driver doesn’t keep change. So if you have only $20 you have to sit at the first place right behind of the driver and the next person who gets in, immediately gives you his $10. Or another, sometimes when the bus is already full, its opens only the back door, but you also have to pay the $10. So the people from hand to hand deliver your pesos to the driver. If you need some change, he sends it back through the people.
I began to practice yoga everyday in the sunset to find my inner peace.

I dropped a post into some Vallarta groups that I looking for friends who also moved here from another country, because I am curious about their experiences, also attached that I offer access bars sessions at the beach if anybody interested in.
(I have to say, this was my most difficult yet most honest post.)
I got a lot of messages.
I’m curious what will it create in my world!

Everything on its place.Amazing.

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23/06/2023

22.06.2023 Birthday

I was struggling in the last few days. Ok.
Honestly since I have arrived here.
I couldn’t understand myself. I couldn’t deal with my thoughts or my feelings.

Today I had the same dream about a group where I had been in my teenage years. Where I don’t want to go back ever.
I never understood why I still have dreams about this group which I left in the past.
My higher self tried to message me.

Today I recognised:

When I’ve arrived here, I had a completely clear page in my life. No past, no name, no any roots.
I completely lost myself.
It was very uncomfortable that I can’t define myself.
So I reached back to my old “trauma” and recreated in my present life, to help me to define myself.
Do you how stupid and ridiculous that sounds?
I do.
I started to creat the same s**t.

Story: I met a guy on my first day here in Puerto Vallarta. He looked nice. We had a nice, interesting,long conversation about life and books, some history. I’m kinda open minded so I begun to share my choices, my thoughts, my feelings about my travel, but he made me wrong all the time. Like: you’re too young, you’re too naive, you’re dork, you can’t speak English ect.

I realised, I have chosen him, because I had have some man in my life when I was 14, who treated me the same way. So I reached back to this story (to this energy) to make myself comfortable. 🤦🏻‍♀️
PPP

My body is more conscious than me.
Since I arrived my body wants more and more, like first I desired for a ceramic plate. I hate eating from a plastic plate. Then a nice mug.
I have never ever could wear jewellery but now, I eager to wear a nice gold necklace.
It’s time to grow and choose a bigger and more delicious life.

🙏Thanks for the delightful photos

23/06/2023

Kinda powerful energy, when you got what you’ve been desired. At first I would describe as sadness which transforms to exhaustion and if you are brave enough to keep diving furthermore into this state you explore that is excitement, and perception of a greater reality what you can have. It’s scary, now I know. Now I know, why most of the people turn around at this point and rather to reject this possibility…
But I’m here, and I willing to accept

23/06/2023

In the last few days my mind is started to transform. I’ve begun think in english and dream in other mixed languages. Kinda difficult because not make sense which language pop up in different situations, and I cannot even control it. I’m just curious where it will go…

anna.luca.toth

05/01/2025

28/07/2023

07/07/2023

05/07/2023

27/06/2023

25/06/2023

23/06/2023

23/06/2023

23/06/2023

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