14/12/2025
DIVORCE IS NOT THE SOLUTION 20
Section II, Chapter 8
The Frequency of S*x in Marriage
One of the silent killers of marriage is irregular intimacy.
Many couples do not fight, yet their homes grow cold because s*x happens rarely, casually, or only when one partner insists.
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God did not leave s*xual frequency to guesswork. He gave clear instruction:
📖 Do not deprive one another except by mutual consent and for a time… then come together again. 1 Corinthians 7:5
When spouses deprive each other, it is disobedience to God’s instruction. During such times, it becomes difficult to walk in God’s full pleasure. As a parent, would you happily bless a child who is in constant disobedience? No until the child aligns and brings joy to the parent.
This shows that regular intimacy is God’s design.
1. There Is No Fixed Number, But There Is a Standard
The Bible does not give a specific number of times per week, but it clearly gives principles:
a. Mutual agreement
b. Regular connection
c. No prolonged denial
When one partner is satisfied and the other is starving, balance is missing.
📖 Let each of you please his neighbor for his good.
Romans 15:2
2. Infrequent S*x Creates Emotional Hunger
When s*x becomes too rare:
a. Affection reduces
b. Irritation increases
c. Temptation grows
d. Distance develops
This is why many couples fight over small issues—the deeper need is unmet.
📖 Rejoice with the wife of your youth. Proverbs 5:18
Joy requires consistency, not occasional effort.
3. A Busy Life Is Not an Excuse
Work, ministry, children, and stress are real, but none should replace intimacy.
What you consistently make time for shows what you truly value.
📖 Two are better than one. Ecclesiastes 4:9
Conclusion
S*xual frequency sustains emotional closeness.
Neglect opens doors to frustration and temptation.
Consistency keeps the marriage warm.
Have intimacy with your spouse in joy, not in sadness.
Make s*x part of your marital routine. Just as you plan for payday expenses, plan for intimacy. Waiting until late at night when tiredness has taken over may leave your spouse emotionally wounded.
Never cause your spouse to be sad through neglect.
As a married man or woman, s*x is not a sin it is a marital exercise designed by God.
to be continue........
Ajay O. Samuel
📞 For counselling: 07046114112
