17/10/2025
PART THREE
I woke up with a start, my breathing considerably heavy and my eyes puffy. Had I cried myself to sleep again? Apparently I had. Mostly I tried not to sleep at all; the less I slept the fewer nightmares I had. It would be the same thing time and time again. Walls closing in on me, a window on the other side of which Noah stood, smiling at me. I tried to break the barrier between us but time would always run out, the walls would always close in on me and I'd wake up screaming for release.
I wondered if Zach heard the screaming, if it had any effect on him. Since the day the doctor came to see me Zach and I had not met. I was glad for once that in the huge house, two people could live together without having to see each other. He lived on the first floor and my room was on the upper one. It was convenient for both of us since Zach could come and go as he pleased and I could enjoy the solitude. The only people I ever met were members of the staff, women who'd come to clean and the butler who'd come to serve me food. I hated being waited upon but something in me never allowed me to leave the confines of my room.
The house wasn't mine, I didn't belong here. I had no right to walk around the place like I owned it.
I pulled the robe around myself, seeing as how I was shivering in my silk nightgown. My things had been sent from the house and I'd had quite the breakdown the day they arrived. My clothes, shoes, books, old photographs, all of it came to me perfectly packed in boxes. I laughed bitterly to myself as I remembered the fact that they hadn't sent a single thing which could possibly relate to Noah. The gifts he'd given me, a framed photograph, the occasional teddy bear, some jewellery, none of it was there. My mother must've thought that it was for the better, to not have any reminders of the past in my new life. If only she knew that my new life was more like purgatory, maybe then she'd have taken pity on me and sent me the things which reminded me of the one good memory that I could associate with my old life.
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