03/04/2026
9 DANG£R0US WEDDINGS SINGLES MUST NOT DO
© Samuel Olagbenjo
I once counseled a couple whose marriage didn’t last six months after a wedding that looked like a movie.
Everything sparkled that day — the hall, the lights, the outfits, the guests. But beneath the glamor was a silent truth: they weren’t ready for marriage.
They focused so much on the wedding that they forgot about the marriage. The ceremony was beautiful, but the union was broken.
Sadly, that’s the reality for many singles today — spending more time preparing for the day than the life after the day.
Before you say “I do,” here are 9 types of weddings you must avoid if you truly want a joyful, lasting marriage.
💣 1. The “Competition” Wedding
This is when your goal is to outshine others — not to honor God.
You’re trying to prove a point to friends, family, or exes: “My wedding will be bigger!”
🔹 D@nger: You’ll drain your finances and start marriage with unnecessary debt.
🔹 Action Step: Focus on peace, not pressure. Have a modest, meaningful wedding that reflects your values — not people’s expectations.
💣 2. The “Loan and Borrow” Wedding
Many couples borrow money to impress people who will forget about their wedding in one week.
It’s a financial trap disguised as celebration.
🔹 D@nger: You’ll start marriage with stress, shame, and arguments about money.
🔹 Action Step: Plan within your means. Cut your guest list, simplify your plans, and remember — peace after the wedding is more important than applause during it.
💣 3. The “We Just Met” Wedding
You’ve known each other for 3 months, and now you want to marry — because “it feels right.”
Emotions may be high, but wisdom is low.
🔹 D@ng£r: You don’t know each other’s character, triggers, or values. What looks like love might just be infatuation.
🔹 Action Step: Slow down. Spend at least a year knowing, observing, and praying. Love that lasts is not rushed.
💣 4. The “Family Pressure” Wedding
Your parents, friends, or pastor want you to marry — but your spirit isn’t at peace.
You’re not sure, but you don’t want to disappoint them.
🔹 D@nger: You’ll end up in a lifelong r£gret just to please others.
🔹 Action Step: Don’t let anyone push you into a covenant you’ll have to sustain alone. Marriage is not a group project. Wait until you’re truly ready and convinced.
💣 5. The “Pregnancy-Forced” Wedding
Getting pregnant before marriage doesn’t mean you must marry the person.
Many rushed into marriage out of guilt, not love — and lived in r£gret.
🔹 D@nger: When the foundation is f£ar or pressure, the marriage will struggle with trust and resentment.
🔹 Action Step: Seek wise counsel. Don’t make a lifetime decision to cover a short-term mistake. God can redeem your story without you rushing into the wrong union.
💣 6. The “Show-Off” Wedding
This is when your wedding becomes a stage performance.
Everything is about pictures, hashtags, and likes — not the covenant.
🔹 D@nger: You’ll start your marriage on a fake foundation — caring more about impressions than intimacy.
🔹 Action Step: Simplify. Focus on vows, not videos. Focus on meaning, not makeup. Your marriage matters more than your social media moments.
💣 7. The “We Didn’t Pray” Wedding
Some couples spend months planning the décor but never spend one hour praying about their union.
They know the color of their cake, but not the will of God.
🔹 D@nger: You’ll have a beautiful event with no divine backing.
🔹 Action Step: Involve God early. Pray together. Seek spiritual counsel. Don’t let excitement blind your discernment.
💣 8. The “We Haven’t Settled Our Conflicts” Wedding
You keep arguing, shouting, and hurting each other — yet you say, “We’ll change after marriage.”
That’s a d@nger0us illusion.
🔹 D@nger: Marriage doesn’t fix problems; it amplifies them.
🔹 Action Step: Resolve your issues before the wedding. Attend premarital counseling. Don’t walk into a covenant with open wounds.
💣 9. The “No Purpose, No Plan” Wedding
You love each other, but you’ve never discussed goals, values, children, money, or calling.
You’re emotionally connected but purposefully confused.
🔹 D@nger: You’ll have chemistry but no direction — and passion without purpose quickly fades.
🔹 Action Step: Talk about your vision as a couple. Where are we going? What are we building? Align your dreams before you tie the knot.
💡 FINAL WORD:
A successful marriage is not about a perfect wedding — it’s about a prepared heart.
Don’t let the world pressure you into a day that destr0ys your destiny.
Let your wedding glorify God, honor your values, and set your marriage on a foundation of peace.
✨ It’s better to have a small wedding with great understanding than a big wedding with lifelong confusion.
📘 If this blessed you, share it.
Let’s help singles build marriages that last — not just weddings that trend.
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© Pst Samuel Olagbenjo II
Marriage & Family Therapist | Author | Founder, Marital Success Academy
