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Vassia Sar, Schipholweg 103, Leiden (2025)

03/12/2025

“I want to be better than yesterday… Every. Single. Day.

I don't see what's wrong with that.

But when I have a bad day, I feel defeated.

How can I grow every day?”

A client asked me this recently, and I know many silently carry the same fear.

We love 💛 the idea of constant improvement:

becoming wiser, stronger, calmer, more productive… daily.

And when life cooperates, it almost feels possible.

But then a bad day arrives:

😵‍💫 A foggy mind.

💤A drained body.

😨A wave of self-doubt.

🧗🏻 A simple task that suddenly feels like climbing a mountain.

And that loves drama turns this vulnerable moment into the usual self-flagellation:

"You’re slipping."

"You’re falling behind."

"You should be doing better."

But here’s the truth (one I’ve seen again and again in my work with , -prone professionals, and in my own life):

Growth is not a straight line.

And "bad days" are not the opposite of growth - they are PART of it.

Some days you grow through clarity and progress.

Other days you grow through gentleness, rest, and staying connected to yourself when your energy is low.

Wanna know what are the 2 TIPS I use with myself and my clients in order to silence this self-doubt during bad days?

Then check my new Insight Timer track:

🟡 "Growing... Even on the Bad Days"

A short, grounded reminder that you’re still evolving, even when life feels messy, slow, or heavy.

👉 Listen here: https://insig.ht/VMrzh7oDNYb?utm_source=copy_link&utm_medium=live_stream_share

If you’re having one of those days, please remember:

You are not failing.

You are human.

And you are growing in ways you can’t always measure.

With warmth and kindness (even on the bad days),

Vassia Sarantopoulou

Psychologist | Perfectionism & Burnout Specialist | Founder of AntiLoneliness & The Therapy Business Circle.

02/12/2025

Why do we use perfectionism to avoid our own potential?
Because perfectionism feels safer than progress.

Here are three reasons I see again and again in high achievers:

𝟭. 𝗙𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗼𝗳 𝗳𝗮𝗶𝗹𝘂𝗿𝗲
If you never finish, you can never be judged.
Delaying keeps you “safe.”

𝟮. 𝗙𝗲𝗮𝗿 𝗼𝗳 𝗷𝘂𝗱𝗴𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁
You try to make your work likable for everyone.
In the process, you lose your authenticity and your voice.

𝟯. 𝗜𝗺𝗽𝗼𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗿 𝘀𝘆𝗻𝗱𝗿𝗼𝗺𝗲
You delay because you believe you need one more course, one more year, one more certification before you are allowed to take up space.

Perfectionism becomes a shield.
But that shield becomes your cage.
You stay in the “almost ready” zone.
You stay in potential instead of experiencing progress.
𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗳𝘂𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝗶𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝘄𝗮𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻.
𝗬𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝗳𝘂𝘁𝘂𝗿𝗲 𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳 𝗶𝘀 𝘄𝗮𝗶𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗳𝗼𝗿 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘁𝗼 𝗯𝗲𝗴𝗶𝗻.

With bravery and vulnerability,
Vassia Sarantopoulou
Head Psychologist - Founder of
AntiLoneliness and The Therapy Business Circle
Specialised in Recovering from Burnout & Healing the Wound

27/11/2025

Why does the academic world expect researchers to leave their stresses and worries at the door as if it only wants their productivity, not their humanity?🤔

Last Saturday I was invited by the Association of Spanish Researchers in the Netherlands CENL Científicos Españoles - Países Bajos, led by Carla Rios Arceo and Alberto Gil Jiménez, PhD in order to present the workshop:

"The Psychology of High Performance: Balancing Ambition with Mental Health"

Over 30 highly-skilled, talented researchers

…living far away from home,

…navigating a new language, a new system, a new culture,

…and still expected to perform at the highest level, without ever showing strain.

And here’s what many researchers shared in our workshop:

✨ “I don’t set boundaries because I will not be heard.”

✨ “I don't know how to slow down.”

✨ “I don’t ask for help because I don’t want to disappoint anyone.”

✨ “I overwork to prove I deserve to be here.”

✨ “I’m exhausted, but it feels like I should push harder, not pause.”

These aren’t just external stressors.

These are internal stressors: the hidden drivers that intensify burnout:

🔹

🔹 guilt

🔹 fear of not being enough

🔹 over-responsibility

🔹 hyper-independence (“I should handle this alone”)

🔹 difficulty saying the simplest word: no

And this is exactly what we explored in the workshop.

I loved this community because it is... a community.

Some of them heard for the first time that there are others struggling with the same challenges.

And that was already relieving.

And then we got practical: how to manage and regulate an overloaded when the external expectations accummulate, but before it turns to a .

To everyone who showed up on that cold Saturday afternoon:

🙏🏻Thank you for your openness, your engagement, your laughter, and your courage to talk about the things academia rarely gives space for.

Your is not a luxury.

It’s the foundation of your long-term professional growth.

👉🏻If you are Spanish and you want to become part of this vibrant and inclusive community, please join here: https://www.cenetherlands.nl/en/become-a-member/

Albert and Carla will guide you and make you feel more than welcome 💛

💪🏻Here’s to building a healthier, more humane, more sustainable culture of high performance.

One honest conversation at a time. 🌿

With warmth and bravery,

Vassia Sarantopoulou

Head Psychologist - Founder of AntiLoneliness and The Therapy Business Circle

Specialised in Recovering from Burnout & Healing Perfectionism

25/11/2025

When you’re burned out, socializing starts to feel like work.
Even fun things - dinner with friends, family calls, coffee breaks - start feeling heavy.

Here’s why 👇

1️⃣ 𝗘𝗻𝗲𝗿𝗴𝘆 𝗰𝗼𝗻𝘀𝗲𝗿𝘃𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻
Your brain is flooded with stress hormones and shifts into survival mode.
It tries to save energy by cutting out “non-essentials,” like social connection.

2️⃣ 𝗗𝗲𝗰𝗶𝘀𝗶𝗼𝗻 𝗳𝗮𝘁𝗶𝗴𝘂𝗲
Even simple choices - where to meet, what to wear, what to say - feel impossible.
Your prefrontal cortex (your planning brain) is overloaded.

3️⃣ 𝗦𝗼𝗰𝗶𝗮𝗹 𝗮𝗻𝘅𝗶𝗲𝘁𝘆
When you’re emotionally drained, your brain whispers:
“What if I’m boring? What if people expect too much?”

So you stay home; not because you don’t care, but because the idea of showing up feels exhausting.
It’s not you being antisocial.
It’s your nervous system begging for recovery.

🪴 The goal isn’t to push yourself to be social again; it’s to rebuild enough safety and energy so connection feels possible.

➡️ Download my free guide with the hidden burnout symptoms here: https://vassiasar.kit.com/burnout-symptoms

With bravery and vulnerability,
Vassia Sarantopoulou
Head Psychologist - Founder of
AntiLoneliness and The Therapy Business Circle
Specialised in Recovering from Burnout & Healing the Wound

25/11/2025

Last month, during a panel, someone asked me:

"So tell us… what was the defining moment of your ?"

And I smiled - not because the question wasn’t good, but because if only life worked like that, right?

One big moment, a dramatic turning point, and then life goes on uninterrupted…

Nope. My life has looked more like a series of reinvention episodes.

There was the time I left Greece and started a whole new chapter in the Netherlands.

The time I found myself a student again at 33, doing my second master’s.

The time I started my business with nothing but passion (and maybe a pinch of stubbornness).

The time I learned I had an eye condition that could threaten my vision if untreated.

And many, many others - some empowering, others painfully humbling. Some glamorous, and others… well, let’s just say they didn’t make it to Instagram stories.

And every one of these moments - the beautiful ones and the ones I’d rather not repeat - brought me one step closer to my real self.

Am I “there” yet?

Of course not.

And maybe none of us ever arrive at a final version of “true self.”

But here’s what I know with certainty:

Moments like , breakups, transitions, or loss are often the fertile ground for a real metamorphosis.

Let's not be scared of these moments. They don’t show up to punish us - they arrive with a message.

And even when they hurt (sometimes especially when they hurt), they’re guiding us closer to where we truly belong.

Even if we only take one tiny step a day.

Even if some steps feel messy or uncomfortable.

Especially then.

And because this theme has been sitting with me deeply lately, I recorded a new Insight Timer track for you:

👉 Remembering Your True Self

You will find it on my bio.

It’s a gentle reminder - one you can come back to anytime you forget who you are beneath the stress, the noise, the pressure, and the expectations.

I hope it brings you a quiet moment of grounding.

With kindness,

Vassia Sarantopoulou

Head Psychologist - Founder of AntiLoneliness

25/11/2025

Last month, during a panel, someone asked me:

"So tell us… what was the defining moment of your ?"

And I smiled - not because the question wasn’t good, but because if only life worked like that, right?

One big moment, a dramatic turning point, and then life goes on uninterrupted…

Nope. My life has looked more like a series of reinvention episodes.

There was the time I left Greece and started a whole new chapter in the Netherlands.

The time I found myself a student again at 33, doing my second master’s.

The time I started my business with nothing but passion (and maybe a pinch of stubbornness).

The time I learned I had an eye condition that could threaten my vision if untreated.

And many, many others - some empowering, others painfully humbling. Some glamorous, and others… well, let’s just say they didn’t make it to Instagram stories.

And every one of these moments - the beautiful ones and the ones I’d rather not repeat - brought me one step closer to my real self.

Am I “there” yet?

Of course not.

(My coach ✨Michiel Sujeet Reith✨keeps pushing me to get closer to that every day, but you know... stubbornness, as mentioned above...😎)

And maybe none of us ever arrive at a final version of “true self.”

Here’s what I know with certainty:

moments like , breakups, transitions, or loss are often the fertile ground for a real metamorphosis.

Let's not be scared of these moments. They don’t show up to punish us - they arrive with a message.

And even when they hurt (sometimes especially when they hurt), they’re guiding us closer to where we truly belong.

Even if we only take one tiny step a day.

Even if some steps feel messy or uncomfortable.

Especially then.

And because this theme has been sitting with me deeply lately, I recorded a new Insight Timer track for you:

👉 Remembering Your True Self

https://insig.ht/SV3hf9dXzYb?utm_source=copy_link&utm_medium=live_stream_share

It’s a gentle reminder - one you can come back to anytime you forget who you are beneath the stress, the noise, the pressure, and the expectations.

I hope it brings you a quiet moment of grounding.

And stay tuned…

Next week I’ll be sharing a free webinar on values, meaningful endings, and intentional beginnings - so we can wrap up this year with clarity and walk into the next one feeling more rooted and aligned.

With kindness, curiosity, and a warm cup of something comforting,

Vassia Sarantopoulou

Head Psychologist - Founder of AntiLoneliness and The Therapy Business Circle

Specialised in Recovering from & Healing Anxiety

20/11/2025

We love perfectionism because it feels like a strength.
It helps us excel, improve, grow, and produce beautiful work.
But there is a paradox inside it.

𝗣𝗲𝗿𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗶𝘀𝗺 𝗱𝗼𝗲𝘀 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗼𝗻𝗹𝘆 𝗽𝘂𝘀𝗵 𝘂𝘀 𝗳𝗼𝗿𝘄𝗮𝗿𝗱.
𝗜𝘁 𝗮𝗹𝘀𝗼 𝗵𝗼𝗹𝗱𝘀 𝘂𝘀 𝗯𝗮𝗰𝗸.

It keeps us revising, tweaking, fixing tiny details that do not matter.
It keeps us hiding behind “almost ready.”
It keeps us chasing a standard that no one will ever reach.

And slowly, it becomes a shield 🛡️.
A way to avoid risk.
A way to avoid judgment.
A way to avoid being seen before we feel flawless.

I once worked with a client whose product launch was delayed for more than 18 months.
Not because it was not ready.
But because she was afraid it would not be perfect.

𝗦𝗼 𝘀𝗵𝗲 𝗸𝗲𝗽𝘁 𝗽𝗼𝗹𝗶𝘀𝗵𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗻𝗱 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗻𝗴, 𝗯𝘂𝘁 𝗻𝗼𝘁 𝗽𝗿𝗼𝗴𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀𝗶𝗻𝗴.
𝗧𝗵𝗶𝘀 𝗶𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗽𝗲𝗿𝗳𝗲𝗰𝘁𝗶𝗼𝗻𝗶𝘀𝗺 𝗽𝗮𝗿𝗮𝗱𝗼𝘅.

It looks like ambition.
But it quietly avoids your real potential.

If this resonates, you are not alone.
💙 Perfectionism can be healed.
And your work has value long before it is perfect.

With bravery and vulnerability,
Vassia Sarantopoulou
Head Psychologist - Founder of
AntiLoneliness and The Therapy Business Circle
Specialised in Recovering from Burnout & Healing the Wound

12/11/2025

Have you been canceling plans lately?
Avoiding friends?
Feeling like socializing is “just too much”?

You might wonder if you’re becoming antisocial - or even turning into a hermit.
But what if it’s not your personality that changed…
What if it’s 𝗯𝘂𝗿𝗻𝗼𝘂𝘁?

When your system is in survival mode, your brain starts to conserve energy.
It labels everything non-essential, even joy and connection, as “too expensive.”
So it quietly removes them from your life.

You’re not pushing people away because you don’t care.
You’re protecting yourself from one more demand on an already depleted system.
So please… don’t shame yourself for needing space.

You’re not broken, and you’re not antisocial.
You’re just tired.

Start small: a short message to a friend, a low-pressure coffee, or even a smile exchange with someone safe.
Connection doesn’t need to be big to be healing.

🩵 Burnout doesn’t make you bad at relationships; it just makes your brain tired of surviving.

➡️ Download my free guide with the hidden burnout symptoms here: https://vassiasar.kit.com/burnout-symptoms

With bravery and vulnerability,
Vassia Sarantopoulou
Head Psychologist - Founder of AntiLoneliness and The Therapy Business Circle
Specialised in Recovering from Burnout & Healing the Wound

05/11/2025

You might think you’re recovering from burnout - but without realizing it, you might be keeping it alive.
After years of supporting professionals through burnout, I’ve noticed three common traps that quietly make it worse.
If you recognize yourself in any of them, please know - you’re not alone. These patterns are human, not personal failings.

🔹 𝗧𝗿𝗮𝗽 𝟭: 𝗠𝗶𝗻𝗶𝗺𝗶𝘇𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘀𝘆𝗺𝗽𝘁𝗼𝗺𝘀
You feel tired, but you blame the weather.
You’re overwhelmed, but you tell yourself it’s just a busy week.
You think, “It’ll pass after a weekend away.”
We minimize because we want to stay strong.
But denial doesn’t protect us.
When you downplay your exhaustion, your body has to scream louder to be heard.

🔹 𝗧𝗿𝗮𝗽 𝟮: 𝗪𝗼𝗿𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗵𝗿𝗼𝘂𝗴𝗵 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿 𝘀𝘁𝗿𝗲𝘀𝘀
You think: “If I just finish everything, I’ll finally relax.”
So you push harder, hoping completion will bring peace.
But stress doesn’t live in your to-do list — it lives in your nervous system.
Your body stays in fight-or-flight, even after you’ve “caught up.”
Rest is not a reward for finishing.
It’s the medicine that makes finishing possible.

🔹 𝗧𝗿𝗮𝗽 𝟯: 𝗡𝗼𝘁 𝘁𝗮𝗹𝗸𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝗮𝗯𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗶𝘁
We avoid opening up — at work, at home, even with people we love.
We think silence saves energy. But suppression costs energy.
It takes effort to hold it all in.
Talking about your stress isn’t weakness. It’s relief.
Every time you name what you feel, your nervous system relaxes a little more.

So, which of these traps have you fallen into recently?
For most of us - it’s all three at some point.
Burnout isn’t a personal failure. It’s a signal.
And when we learn to listen instead of minimize, push, or hide, we begin to heal.

🩵 Be gentle with yourself. Healing doesn’t start with doing more — it starts with doing differently.

➡️ 𝗗𝗼𝘄𝗻𝗹𝗼𝗮𝗱 𝗺𝘆 𝗳𝗿𝗲𝗲 𝗴𝘂𝗶𝗱𝗲 𝘄𝗶𝘁𝗵 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗵𝗶𝗱𝗱𝗲𝗻 𝗯𝘂𝗿𝗻𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝘀𝘆𝗺𝗽𝘁𝗼𝗺𝘀 𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲: https://vassiasar.kit.com/burnout-symptoms

With bravery and vulnerability,
Vassia Sarantopoulou
Head Psychologist - Founder of
AntiLoneliness and The Therapy Business Circle
Specialised in Recovering from Burnout & Healing the Wound

31/10/2025

I’ve worked with hundreds of high-achievers who didn’t realize they were burned out…
…until they were completely depleted.

They all had something in common:
They were minimizing, overworking, and staying silent.
And not because they didn’t care about their wellbeing.

But because they’d learned to be strong.
Strong for the team.
Strong for their families.
Strong for their clients.

They told themselves:
💬 “It’s just temporary.”
💬 “I just need a break.”
💬 “I can handle it.”

𝗕𝘂𝘁 𝗵𝗲𝗿𝗲’𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝘁𝗿𝘂𝘁𝗵:
𝗕𝘂𝗿𝗻𝗼𝘂𝘁 𝗱𝗼𝗲𝘀𝗻’𝘁 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁 𝘄𝗵𝗲𝗻 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝗰𝗼𝗹𝗹𝗮𝗽𝘀𝗲.
𝗜𝘁 𝘀𝘁𝗮𝗿𝘁𝘀 𝘁𝗵𝗲 𝗺𝗼𝗺𝗲𝗻𝘁 𝘆𝗼𝘂 𝘀𝘁𝗼𝗽 𝗹𝗶𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗻𝗶𝗻𝗴 𝘁𝗼 𝘆𝗼𝘂𝗿𝘀𝗲𝗹𝗳.

When you dismiss your symptoms, your body compensates. Until it can’t.
When you “work through the stress,” your brain stays in fight-or-flight.
When you don’t talk about it, your emotions go underground and drain you even more.

𝗧𝗵𝗲 𝗰𝗼𝘀𝘁 𝗼𝗳 𝘀𝗶𝗹𝗲𝗻𝗰𝗲 𝗶𝘀 𝗲𝗻𝗲𝗿𝗴𝘆.
You spend more trying to hide your pain than you would if you shared it.

✨ 𝗪𝗵𝗮𝘁 𝗵𝗲𝗹𝗽𝘀 𝗶𝗻𝘀𝘁𝗲𝗮𝗱:
Take every small signal seriously. Fatigue is information.
Stop treating stress with more work; treat it with rest.
Speak. Even a small conversation with someone safe brings relief.

You don’t have to earn your rest.
You don’t have to prove you’re strong.
You just have to start listening - before your body forces you to stop.

➡️ Download my free guide with the hidden burnout symptoms here: https://vassiasar.kit.com/burnout-symptoms

With bravery and vulnerability,
Vassia Sarantopoulou
Head Psychologist - Founder of
AntiLoneliness and The Therapy Business Circle
Specialised in Recovering from Burnout & Healing the Wound

23/10/2025

You’re drained at the end of the day - but if you look back, you didn’t even do that much.
You answered some emails, sat in meetings, scrolled a bit.
And somehow, you’re completely wiped out.
So what is it? Burnout?
Or something else that no one talks about - boreout?

I recently spoke with a client, let’s call her Sophie
She was convinced she was burned out: exhausted, foggy, unmotivated.
But when we looked closer, she wasn’t overwhelmed.
She was underwhelmed.

Her role had changed. Less challenge, more admin, no spark.
She wasn’t drowning in work - she was starving for meaning.
Our brain doesn’t only get tired from doing too much.
It also gets tired from doing too little of what matters.
It needs challenge, focus, novelty - stimulation.
Without it, we lose dopamine, motivation, joy.

That’s why burnout and boreout can look the same on the surface:
😞 Low energy
🧠 Brain fog
💭 Dread or disconnection
But the cause is different - and so is the way out.

Burnout happens when your system is flooded with stress.
Too many demands, not enough recovery.
You feel wired and tired. You can’t stop. You feel guilty for resting.
Your worth feels tied to productivity.

Boreout happens when your system is starved for purpose.
You feel flat and unmotivated.
You procrastinate, feel ashamed for wasting time, and crave something meaningful — but don’t know what that is.

The question to ask yourself is simple:
“Am I exhausted from too much… or from nothing that excites me?”

And whichever it is - burnout or boreout - please remember:
You are not lazy. You are not broken.
You are simply out of alignment.

✨ If it’s burnout → rest before you’ve earned it, say no without guilt, stop proving your worth through productivity.
✨ If it’s boreout → add small challenges, learn something new, create, stretch, reawaken curiosity.

Both paths lead to the same place: coming back home to yourself.

➡️ Download my free guide with the hidden burnout symptoms here: https://vassiasar.kit.com/burnout-symptoms

With bravery and vulnerability,
Vassia Sarantopoulou
Head Psychologist - Founder of AntiLoneliness and
Specialised in Recovering from Burnout & Healing the Wound

22/10/2025

I just finished it. And I'm in shock...
..To realise how and might wear different clothes, but deep down they share the same wound:
"I'm not enough unless I'm needed."

I, like millions of women, used to believe my worth depended on how useful, compassionate, or understanding I was.
No wonder why I was running on empty every now and then... 🪫hashtag

But what actually happens is that we feel we will be accepted based on how many of our own feelings and needs we abandon on a daily basis in order to focus on others.

And there is a point in our life that we clearly see that it was just our way of securing acceptance.

How perfectionism and codependency run parallel?

1. The illusion of control ⚖️

When we feel unworthy, control becomes our safety net.
Perfectionists (want to) control outcomes.
Codependents (want to) control emotions, other people’s emotions.
Both are ways of protecting ourselves from rejection and unpredictability.

2. The distraction from our own pain 🎭

Fixing others keeps us busy.
So busy that we don’t have to feel our own pain, fear, or loneliness.
It feels noble to help, to rescue, to be the strong one.
But often, it’s just a sophisticated way of running away from what hurts inside.

3. The conditional self-worth 🔒

We only feel worthy when others approve, appreciate, or admire us.
When they don’t, we collapse; our sense of worth crumbles.
Because our sense of worth was never rooted within, but in how well we could perform "love", "success", "productivity", "unconditional care".

4. Acceptance vs. performance 🎯

We think, “If I do everything right, they won’t leave.”
We keep auditioning for a place in other people's lives through our perfection, our kindness, our usefulness, our hashtag .

In reality, though, it's "If they need me so much that they depend on me and I'm irreplaceable, they won't be able to leave me".

But in the process, we leave ourselves.

I promised to myself that I will read this book again.
And again, if needed.

Next on my nightstand: Codependent No More.
We’ve learned love wrong.
Boundaries wrong.
Kindness wrong.
It’s time to begin again.

❓QUESTION FOR YOU
Who are you still trying to “fix,” hoping that when they change, you’ll finally feel peace or acceptance?

Maybe the invitation isn’t to fix them, but to meet the parts of yourself that never felt safe to just be.

Stay tuned for more insights on Breaking Free from Perfectionism and Burnout. 🧡

With warmth,

Vassia Sarantopoulou
Head Psychologist - Founder of AntiLoneliness and The Therapy Business Circle
Specialised in Recovering from Burnout & Healing the Perfectionism Wound

Vassia Sar

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