Pūkenga Psychology

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I choose calm over chaos
15/02/2026

I choose calm over chaos

There was a time karakia felt harder than it should have for me. Not because I didn't want to do it, or didn't find it h...
15/02/2026

There was a time karakia felt harder than it should have for me. Not because I didn't want to do it, or didn't find it helpful, more so because I was still l learning te reo Māori.

I’d be halfway through a karakia and my hinengaro would split in two, either trying to remember or translate in real time, questioning pronunciation, worrying about flow. I was so focused on getting the reo “right” that I lost the intention.

One of the hardest part in learning karakia, is the pressure around learning reo. When you’re learning te reo Māori, karakia can feel vulnerable. You’re holding language revitalisation, whakapapa, confidence, and presence all at once.

Karakia is not a fluency test. It’s a practice of grounding, for hauora and connection.

That’s why I created these karakia cards, as a meant of support, so your not holding everything in your head. So you can return to intention.

If you’re learning te reo and want to feel more confident using karakia at home, in therapy, at mahi, or with your tamariki, this is for you.

Comment TIHEI and I’ll send you the link.

14/02/2026

This last week I have spoken more reo to my tamahine then the five weeks before. Its also been a big week of adjustments as the whole routine for our whānau changes again.

We have never been a routine whanau and this last week has proved it more then ever.

One huge shift has my focus on my reo, in particular hapa and pronunciation.

Instead of correcting hapa, the flow and fluency. I just speak. If it's wrong, it's wrong. But I let it be. Fixing it next time that rerenga comes around.

Ive realised that I was in my head to much and lots of my self corrections were interrupting out korero. I want reo and connection, not my reo at the cost of my connection.

It's also just helped me korero. It lifted a pressure I didn't know was there

Any advice from other parents reclaiming reo in there home? What helps you keep reo alive?

Valentines day is one of those times of the year that can carry mixed emotions. Lots of big feelings, whakaaro, celebrat...
14/02/2026

Valentines day is one of those times of the year that can carry mixed emotions. Lots of big feelings, whakaaro, celebrations, grief and complexities.

Where ever your Valentines falls today, know it is not a reflection of your worth. Love exists in many ways and forms.

13/02/2026

Third year of full immersion.

I genuinely thought by now I’d be fluent. I had timelines in my head. Quiet deadlines I never said out loud but absolutely held myself to.

What I’ve learned is this, fluency isn’t built on pressure. It’s built on staying.
When I shifted from time-based goals to kōrero-based goals, everything softened.

Instead of “How many years until I’m fluent?” it became, “Did I show up to the kōrero today?”

Kōrero where I am brave enough to stay to the kaupapa. Stumble through. Use the reo I have and not switch back to English when it's easier or gets uncomfortable.

That shift changed my whole experience of learning te reo Māori. My mauri feels steadier. My capacity feels clearer

This journey isn’t just mine. It’s for my tamaiti. For the way she will stand with her reo in the future.

If you’re on your reo journey too, are you measuring time, or kōrero?

Its easy for people's whakaaro to slowly wear you down over time. The repeated comments, jokes, looks, actions or inacti...
13/02/2026

Its easy for people's whakaaro to slowly wear you down over time. The repeated comments, jokes, looks, actions or inactions, it sends messages to us, that we can sometimes begin to take on as truth, without even realizing.

Sometimes they are loud and we take note, more often then not, its the subtle repeated things that begin to wear us down.

Your Mauri and Wairua, are two of the stronges things to help you check if who your by and what your listening to whakamana's you or brings you donw.

12/02/2026

As we head into the weekend.

Let go of others whakaaro, korero, comments or actions of those who you don't share values with it. Unless it brings real threat in the here and now, park it, leave it, release it. Don't let it weigh on your weekend. Ruin time with loved ones.

If someone doesn't share your values then their whakaaro will never fit with you.

That's OK.

We get to decide what we take on. Not all whakaaro, korero or actions even inactions deserve our attention.

Who has something they need to let go of, so you can have a good weekend.

12/02/2026

Take a moment now.

Check in.

Listen.

Then respond.

Comment hauora below if you want a link to our online course to explore protecting and caring for your mauri.

11/02/2026

I would have once told you resilience is my greatest strength, my ability to hold it together and keep going. I have this deep drive in me and regardless of what s**t gets thrown my way, I would keep going. I described it at resilience, but really it was more like survival. Trying to survive the s**t and live my life.

This isn't something for me i want to keep doing. It's not a way I want to my tamahine to see me living.

Something I am proud of is, letting myself unravel. Fall down and then get back up when I am ready, to try again. I get things wrong, I am never the best at things, but it doesn't stop me trying. Taking opportunities. When s**t gets hard now, I let it be felt, and take my time

11/02/2026

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