Tong & Peryer Funeral Directors

12/12/2025

Last week, I became what I so often stand beside. I lost my dad. I was a grieving son and brother.

As a funeral director, people often assume we’re somehow “used to” death, that we’re stronger, steadier, more prepared for grief. The truth is simple… when it’s your own, it cuts just as deeply.

I feel the same ache, the same disbelief, the same quiet moments where the world keeps turning while mine feels paused. On Wednesday, I will attend our Christmas service carrying my own grief alongside the families I have served throughout this year — not because I’m immune to it, but because I understand it. And it will be hard, as I hold space not only for them, but for myself and my dad too.

This Christmas will also look different.
There will be an empty chair where my dad should be.
A silence that wasn’t there before.

Grief doesn’t mean we stop living. It means we learn how to carry love in a new way. I’m giving myself permission to feel it all, even while I continue to show up for others, as I did for the two families I supported this week. Dad was proud of me and what I do and I know he would have wanted me there for them.

I share this not for sympathy, but for honesty. Funeral directors grieve too. We are not untouched by loss, we are shaped by it. We are all human first.

My pain reminds me that love is the reason it hurts, and the reason I will keep going.

11/12/2025

This week, we lost our incredible dad and husband of his best friend Jean of 64 years.

A steady, incredibly generous, quietly extraordinary man whose guidance shaped so much of who we all are. It’s hard to find words big enough for a loss like this as its been so sudden but we are so grateful, he did it all on his terms. Our hearts are heavy, but also full of gratitude for the amazing years we have had with him.

The world feels a whole heap emptier today, but the memories of him shine brighter than ever as we share the stories, the laughs (and there are many) and the life lessons, he gave so freely.

Thank you Nigel, Dad for everything you were and everything you gave, we are so proud of you. May your journey be gentle, even though we know there will be whole lot of trouble happening as you catch up with those gone before you.

Dad didnt want a funeral but he loved his happy hour so thats what we did and he would have loved it - music, song, stories and a heap of laughter!

04/12/2025

Every year we hold a Christmas Remembrance Service for anyone who has lost a loved one this year, and in previous years too. Please join us and light a candle in their memory as we honour them and remember them with love. Everyone Welcome.

WEDNESDAY 17 DECEMBER at 6.00PM
CRESTWOOD CHAPEL, HASTINGS

18/11/2025

At Tong & Peryer Funeral Directors, our unwavering commitment to providing exceptional funeral care remains at the forefront of our mission. We understand that every family's needs are unique, and we strive to deliver compassionate and personalised support during difficult times. Our numerous customer reviews reflect our dedication to excellence and the trust families place in us. Thank you for allowing us to serve you with the utmost respect and care.

13/11/2025

Remembering Maureen Marie Seed (1938 – 2025)

We’re saddened to share the passing of Maureen Seed, a treasured member of the Tong & Peryer family who worked with us from 1960 to 2007.

For nearly five decades, Maureen was the welcoming face at our front desk — kind, composed, and always ready with a friendly word. Her incredible memory for names and numbers made her a powerhouse within the funeral home, and her warmth left a lasting impression on every family she met.

Maureen’s care and commitment helped shape the heart of Tong & Peryer for such a huge part of her life. We’re deeply grateful for all she gave and for the grace with which she served.

Rest peacefully, Maureen — you will always be part of our story.

09/11/2025

In Loving Memory of Mrs Zeta Estcourt (1922 – 2025)

Today we pause to remember a truly remarkable woman — Mrs Zeta Estcourt, aged 103, the last surviving granddaughter of Samuel Tong, the founder of Tong & Peryer Funeral Directors.

As we farewell Zeta, we also celebrate the extraordinary span of history she represented. From her grandfather’s beginnings in the late 1800s to the modern, evolving world we serve today, her life was a bridge across more than a century of Hawke’s Bay stories.

To us, she wasn’t just part of our history; she was a living link to it — a reminder of where we came from and the people who paved the way.

Our heartfelt thoughts are with Zeta’s family as they remember a remarkable woman, mother and grandmother.

07/11/2025

Mr Paul Brough
Suddenly passed away Tuesday 4th November 2025 aged 85yrs. Dearly loved husband of Sue, Loved father and father in law of Carolyn and Rod, Graeme, Kelly and Nigel, James and Lu. Beloved grandad of Adam, Dakota, Jade, Dylan, Luke , Malia and Makaia. Loved great grandad to Arty, Donny and Addy. Great mate to Darla and Sparkie.

Dad is at home until Monday 10th November lunchtime, all welcome to visit then a private cremation will be held.

Messages for the Brough family C/- P O Box 967, Hastings or online via tribute link below.

04/11/2025

17/10/2025

James Brendan Bolger (Jim), New Zealand's 35th Prime Minister.
Regardless of our politics, we pause today to remember Jim Bolger, former Prime Minister of New Zealand and renowned family man.
Described as a man of principle and pragmatism, his leadership left a lasting mark on Aotearoa New Zealand for so many reasons.
Our heartfelt aroha to his family and friends.
Haere atu rā, e te rangatira.

14/10/2025

At Tong & Peryer Funeral Directors, we understand that navigating local arrangements during a difficult time can be overwhelming if youre from out of town. That's why we've compiled a comprehensive list of Concierge Services on our website to assist you. Whether you need hotel accommodations, dining options, or transportation while you're visiting, we're here to make the process easier. Click here to explore all the resources we offer for your convenience. (and let us know of anythng we might be missing)
https://www.tongandperyer.co.nz/tong-peryer-funeral-directors-concierge/

07/10/2025

At Tong & Peryer, our passion is crafting one-of-a-kind farewells that pay tribute to a life well-lived. We are dedicated to honouring and celebrating the unique journey of each individual with a meaningful and personalised farewell. In choosing us, you choose a funeral partner who blends generational trust, modern relevance, and a heartfelt commitment to making your goodbye uplifting.
visit our website or call us today.
www.tongandperyer.co.nz or (06) 878 5149.