Buds to Blooms Educational Psychology NZ

14/07/2023

Have you ever felt that your child has been labelled ‘naughty’ or ‘mean’ because people haven’t taken the time to understand a situation from their perspective? I hear this often from parents I work with.

This article is a great reminder that as parents and teachers, we should seek to understand the reasons for ‘negative’ behaviours rather than blaming and shaming. Only then can we teach our children to find better ways to express themselves.

Why simply teaching kindness is rarely enough.

19/06/2023

If your child has difficulty with reading or writing and you are based in Kapiti then Read Write Kapiti Tuition is worth checking out. Structured literacy tutors are hard to find, and not all schools in Kapiti have adopted this science based approach to reading yet.
Structured literacy is a proven approach to support children with learning disabilities, but is the gold standard in literacy teaching for all learners.
If your child is struggling with reading, writing, or mathematics, then contact me to discuss if a learning disability assessment would be useful for you.

20/03/2023

If your child has ADHD or struggles with executive function and self-management, then check out this free event through learning matters.
Adele Diamond is a world leader in the field of executive functioning, so be sure to watch this event if you can!

Really looking forward to connecting with Prof. Adele Diamond next week to discuss Executive Functions, the implications of limited Executive Functions on learning and everyday life, and what we can do as parents and or teachers specifically to support their development.

We hope you can join us.

Register via facebook ... https://fb.me/e/TPvCpua5

18/11/2022

Love this!

We all do or say things we shouldn’t sometimes. This isn’t about breakage, it’s about being human. It’s about a brain that has registered ‘threat’, and a body that is getting ready to respond.

‘Threat’ counts as anything that comes with any risk at all (real or perceived) of missing out on something important, separation from friends or you or their other important people, judgement, humiliation, failure, disappointment or disappointing their important people, unfairness or loss. It can also count as physical (sensory overload or underload, pain, exhaustion, hunger), or relational (not feeling seen or heard, nit feeling valued, feeling replaced, not feeling welcome, feeling disconnected from you or someone important).

Young ones have the added force of nervous systems that haven’t yet got their full adult legs yet. When brains have a felt sense of threat, they will organise bodies for fight (this can look like tantrums, aggression, irritation, frustration), flight (this can look like avoidance, ignoring, turning away) or freeze (this can look like withdrawal, hiding, defiance, indifference, aloofness).

The behaviour is the smoke. The fire is a brain that needs to be brought back to a felt sense of safety. We can do this most powerfully through relationship and connection. Breathe, be with, validate (with or without words - if the words are annoying for them just feel what they feel so they can feel you with them).

When their brains and bodies are back to calm, then the transformational chats can happen: ‘What happened?’ ‘What can I do to help next time?’ ‘What can you do?’ ‘You’re a great kid and I know you didn’t want this to happen, but here we are. How can you put this right? Do you need my help with that?’

Of course, sometimes our boundaries will create a collision that also sets nervous systems on fire. You don’t need to fix their big feelings. They aren’t broken. Stand behind the boundary, flag the behaviour (‘It’s not ok to … I know you know that’) and then shift the focus to relationship - (‘I’m right here’ or, ‘Okay I can hear you want space. I’m going to stay right over here until you feel better. I’m here when you’re ready.’)♥️

11/11/2022

It’s been a busy year and we are now fully booked for 2022!

If you are considering a cognitive, learning disability, or ADHD assessment next year then spaces are available from mid January 2023.

02/11/2022

For those kiwis out there, don’t forget that this Friday is GUMBOOT FRIDAY!

This organisation raises money to provide free counseling for children in need, and receives no government funding to provide this service. As a counselling therapist myself, I know that the wait time for services is just too long.

represents New Zealanders getting stuck in and helping out others in need. I have the hugest respect for this organisation who are committed to making a change.

See www.gumbootfriday.org.nz for ways you can help. Or text ‘boots’ to 469 to make a $3 donation!

01/11/2022

After a looong three month wait my WPPSI-IV assessment kit has finally arrived!
Thanks to those who have been waiting patiently for this to get here from overseas, the shipping delays are unreal right now!!

I am so pleased to now be able to offer cognitive assessments for children from the age of 2 years 6 months.

17/09/2022

This poem brings a little tear every time I see it. Children did not ask to be neurodiverse, and they are trying the best they can. Let’s be understanding and recognise all their strengths and talents!

Take my hand and come with me,
I want to teach you about ADHD.
I need you to know, I want to explain,
I have a very different brain.
Sights, sounds and thoughts collide.
What to do first? I can’t decide.
Please understand I'm not to blame,
I just can't process things the same.

Take my hand and walk with me,
Let me show you about ADHD.
I try to behave, I want to be good,
But I sometimes forget to do as I should.
Walk with me and wear my shoes,
You'll see its not the way I'd choose.
I do know what I'm supposed to do,
But my brain is slow getting the message through.

Take my hand and talk with me,
I want to tell you about ADHD.
I rarely think before I talk,
I often run when I should walk.
It's hard to get my school work done,
My thoughts are outside having fun.
I never know just where to start,
I think with my feelings and see with my heart.

Take my hand and stand by me,
I need you to know about ADHD.
It's hard to explain but I want you to know,
I can't help letting my feelings show.
Sometimes I'm angry, jealous, or sad.
I feel overwhelmed, frustrated, and mad.
I can't concentrate and I lose all my stuff.
I try really hard but it's never enough.

Take my hand and learn with me,
We need to know more about ADHD.
I worry a lot about getting things wrong,
Everything I do takes twice as long.
Everyday is exhausting for me...
Looking through the fog of ADHD.
I'm often so misunderstood,
I would change in a heartbeat if I could.

Take my hand and listen to me,
I want to share a secret about ADHD.
I want you to know there is more to me.
I'm not defined by it, you see.
I'm sensitive, kind and lots of fun.
I'm blamed for things I haven't done.
I'm the loyalist friend you'll ever know,
I just need a chance to let it show.

Take my hand and look at me,
Just forget about the ADHD.
I have real feelings just like you.
The love in my heart is just as true.
I may have a brain that can never rest,
But please understand I'm trying my best.
I want you to know, I need you to see,
I'm more than the label, I am still me!!!!
The author is Andrea Chesterman-Smith. From Hertfordshire in the UK

28/08/2022

Too many undiagnosed (and diagnosed) children with learning disorders are struggling in New Zealand schools, and more can be done to help them reach their potential.

Sign the petition below for a public inquiry into the services and support currently provided for children with dyslexia and neurodiversity.

Dyslexia/neurodiversity affects around 15% of people worldwide, and impacts on their education, their working lives, and wider social interactions. Dyslexia/neurodiversity are best described as differences, as opposed to disabilities, but the way that society treats them turns them into disabilities...

16/08/2022

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09/08/2022

If your teen is struggling with big feelings sparx is worth a look. This online game teaches therapeutic techniques based on cognitive behavioural therapy, which is widely considered the most effective form of therapy for many mental health conditions. It’s also free - so what have you got to lose??