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Dontbetoxic, Lahore (2025)

20/08/2019

Remember. You are important. You matter. Know your worth and dont ever settle for less. No one is worth your tears. And if someone in your life is only causing pain and letting you down then it is okay to let go that person. Your happiness matters the most 💫

20/08/2019

Most people going through mental illness face the issue of being called attention seekers. If someone is going through something and if you tell them that it is not that big of an issue or you label them as liars, that could be one of the worst things you can do to that person. All they need is someone's support and someone to believe in them instead of labelling them as liars and attention seekers. Be there for your friends, your family or any other person you feel need helps. Giving them a shoulder to cry on and just listening to them will help them to a great extend and it will mean so much to them. Be kind 🌼

19/08/2019

I lost my childhood. Someone known to my family sexually abused me. My world was shattered and panic was soaked into my every pore. From a happy talkative girl, I receded into my shell. I lost all my friends, I stopped playing, going out and I would just stay in my room. My parents had their own problems to deal with and at that time they didn't realize what I had been going through, they didn't realize that something was different with me. The abuse continued for months and I finally told my mother about it. All she said was to stay quite and never to utter a word about it to anyone. And that's what I did. After telling her, the abuse stopped but no one ever asked me if I was okay. I never talked about it and I never completely let it out. Not even a single day went by when I didn’t think of it and 10 years later I couldn't hold it in anymore. I had to let it out. I spoke to my parents, I made them realize that I required their support and love and I needed someone to talk to. I cried, I yelled. I stood up for myself and I made them aware of the mistakes they had made. I have always had this distance with my family because of this reason. Remember, you have the right to fight for your rights even if the fight is against your own family. Your family may not always be right and it is okay to correct them.
Having a child is a huge responsibility and it is the duty of a parent to fulfill all the responsibilities as they bought the child into this world. Parents make mistakes too, they are human after all. What happened to me wasn’t their fault but afterwards they could have helped me coup with it better. That’s where they made the mistake, they didn’t know how to talk to me about it and I had no one else because I couldn’t tell this to anyone.
Anonymous story

19/08/2019

Mental illnesses affect 19% of the adult population, 46% of teenagers and 13% of children each year. However due to the stigma attached to it, most of the population does not receive treatment for it. Although the past few years have shown that there has been an improvement towards the stigma but it is still powerful. This stigma not only affects the number of people seeking treatment but also the resources available for the treatment. Pakistan has only one psychiatrist for every 10,000 people suffering from any sort of mental illness. Only five major psychiatric hospitals exist and this is one of the major factors contributing towards the increase in mental illness.
In the post above are a few tips on how you can help someone with mental illness and what you should avoid saying to them.

19/08/2019

A heartbreak
You love someone wholeheartedly, you give them your all, you're happy and they look happy too. They seem to love you too and you feel safe around them, you feel comfortable and you put your trust in them. And then one day you realise that you were stupid enough to think that you were the only flower in their garden. Your heart shatters, the pain you feel is unbearable and they beg you, they promise you to fix it, make it better, they say they'll change. But they don't. They end up doing it again and you forgive them again. And then again..... the cycle repeats itself and you're stuck in that loop. You try to recover from it but the damage that they've done is too much. You've been hurting for too long and sometimes you just want the pain to end, you want everything to end because dealing with it gets too much for you. You get nightmares, you think about it every single day, it's like everything they've done to hurt you is imprinted on your brain. It just never goes away no matter what you do, you lose sleep, you lose your appetite and you start losing your mind. You feel weak and pathetic for not being able to walk out because you're so attached, because you made yourself vulnerable, you let them take you for granted. You gave and you gave your all and what you wanted in return was love, loyalty and honestly. Trusting them becomes impossible for you and even when they're not lying you feel like they are. You cant differentiate between the lies and truth now. You still love them but not as much. You have no control over your emotions, you get mad and sad abruptly. You realise your whole relationship was a lie. You feel like you're never going to find happiness, you dont have it in you to invest in someone else because you've given up. If that someone of yours could end up hurting you like this you think anyone is capable of doing it and you think if you invest in someone else all this is going to happen to you again.
How about invest in yourself for a change and stop investing in other people who don't value your worth. Who dont recognise and appreciate the things you for them, who take you for granted, who hurt you again and again. Put yourself ahead of them because they dont deserve the love and care you've given them over time. You deserve that. Its time you were around people who put an effort in making you happy rather than the other way around. Make your happiness your priority and gather up the courage to leave the toxic people in your life behind you. Because honey you deserve the best and nothing less. And if they can't provide you with the best then they simply just don't deserve you. Be your own queen/king!
And for those of you who are not yet ready to get in a mature adult relationship, please make it clear so that you dont end up hurting the other person. You need to realise that a relationship requires a lot of things, a lot compromises/sacrifices and you have to give up a lot to be in a serious relationship. If you're not willing to do that, thats fine. But please have the decency to be honest with your partner then so they dont expect anything from you, dont break their hearts. Its not something to be played with. And if you want that person to be yours and yours only then deliver the same. If you cant bare them doing the things you've been doing to them then stop! Choosing a good time, a fascination of something, over a good thing you have going on might end up becoming your biggest regret. A mistake is made once, a thing that you keep on repeating again and again is your habit. And habits don't change that easily so if you REALLY want change them start with yourself, work on yourself. Change your habits. So think before you act, your actions define what you are who you want to be. And if you're actually willing to change and want to change for them then show it, put in as much effort as you can. Show them that you deserve it by your actions, not just by your words. Show them how they matter, show them how much they mean to you and appreciate them. And it is going to take time to fix everything. A broken heart requires a fair amount of time to be fixed.
By an anonymous person

06/08/2019

"I have struggled from anxiety all my teenage life and I am still struggling. Back in my early teens, I used to loose sleep, I had eating disorders and I appeared to be down most of the time. No one talked about anxiety openly and it wasn’t given much attention. We as kids were never made aware about it. So my family thought there was something physically wrong with me, even I thought that because I didn’t think that a mental state could affect you on such great level. So we had a bunch of tests done but everything appeared to be just fine. One day, I burst out. I took out everything that I had kept inside of me for years. I went to therapy and the psychologists advised me to fix myself because I was hurting my loved around me and I need to look after them. She didn't give me any advice on how to fix myself and so I decided to change my therapist because she had ultimately led to feeling more pathetic about myself. Unfortunately there are a very few well-qualified and decent psychologist here in Pakistan. Which is quite sad as here the percentage of people who suffer from mental illness here is plentiful. Now, I'm doing better. I share my problems, my issues with my family and very close trusted friends. Trust me, it makes things a hundred times better. So people, speak out! Don't hold it in. You'll just make it worse for yourself. It all starts with you. You have to be your biggest strength. Its not easy I know but take a start. Baby steps you know. Lets learn to talk about it and take a step forward as a society. Your mental illness doesn’t define you but your fight with it will definitely do it. There is always a bright sunny morning waiting for you after a stormy night. "

*Anonymous story*

05/08/2019

“Not all wounds are visible"
Depression needs to treated like any other medical condition and not as a stigma
The wound that damages you the most is the one from within. Which no one can see and only you yourself know what you are going through. To be healthy your mental health plays a vital role. It is not something that should be ignored.. Don't be ashamed to speak up, your story will definitely help others suffering from a similar situation. It will inspire other to speak
It is not something that can you fixed in a day. One step at a time. Taking one step today and talking today will help lead to a better tomorrow.

Dontbetoxic

20/08/2019

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