Cabinet de Psihoterapie Deva

17/02/2026

Spanking, or physical punishment, doesn’t teach understanding.
It teaches fear, compliance, and silence.

When a child is hurt, their brain isn’t learning right from wrong — it’s learning how to avoid pain, hide mistakes, and stay safe from the person they need most.

Discipline that relies on fear may stop behaviour in the moment, but it doesn’t build skills, insight, or emotional safety.
And it often leaves long-term imprints we don’t see until much later.

We can guide behaviour without harm.
We can set boundaries without breaking trust.
And we can teach children why — not just make them obey.

31/01/2026

Reading bedtime stories is one of the simplest parenting activities, yet it produces profound biological effects. When fathers read to their children, vocabulary growth can increase by up to 40%. This enhanced language development supports communication, learning, and long-term cognitive skills.

Mothers reading the same stories trigger a different but equally important effect. Children’s stress hormone levels drop by around 20%, helping them feel calm, safe, and ready for sleep. Lower stress levels support emotional regulation, attachment, and overall brain development.

These findings demonstrate that the same activity can influence children in different ways depending on who is reading. Both effects are valuable, highlighting how small, daily interactions can shape cognitive and emotional growth.

Parents can maximize benefits by reading regularly, ensuring children receive attention from both mothers and fathers. The combination of language enrichment and stress reduction builds stronger, more resilient brains.

This small habit has outsized returns. Five to ten minutes of bedtime reading daily contributes to long-term vocabulary development, emotional health, and parent-child connection, showing that consistency and presence matter more than duration.

31/01/2026

A Child’s Voice – After School, I Need You to Know
The Child Who Masks

Earlier today I shared the swan model.

The one that looks calm on the surface, gliding through the school day — while underneath, it’s paddling fast just to stay afloat.

This is that same child, speaking now.

When I come out of school, I’m not being “dramatic”.
I’m not suddenly difficult.
I’m not undoing all the good behaviour you were told about.

I’ve been holding it together all day.

I’ve pushed feelings down so I didn’t stand out.
I’ve copied others so I could fit in.
I’ve kept my stims small and hidden.
I’ve smiled when I didn’t feel OK.
I’ve tried to remember every rule so no one got cross.
I’ve ignored what felt too loud, too bright, too much.

And by the time I reach you, there’s nothing left in the tank.

What looks like defiance, tears, shutdown, or anger after school is often exhaustion from masking.

If this feels familiar, you’re not alone — and neither is your child.

To SAVE, click on the image, tap the three dots, and choose Save.
If you’d like the boy version, comment BOY below.

My Masking Toolkit supports parents and educators to understand masking, recognise the hidden load, and reduce the pressure children carry just to be accepted. Link in comments below ⬇️ or via Linktree Shop in Bio.

15/12/2025

Denmark is moving away from the “cry it out” sleep training method, largely due to pressure from over 700 psychologists who signed an open letter citing harm to infant emotional development, leading the Danish board to reconsider its guidance, emphasizing responsive care and secure attachment as healthier alternatives.
Studies find consistently ignoring a crying baby can negatively impact their brain development, increase stress hormones like cortisol and can even affect their future emotional health.
Babies communicate their needs by crying, and ignoring these cries can lead to prolonged periods of stress, causing a rise in cortisol levels. Elevated cortisol levels can negatively impact brain development, brain structure and a baby’s ability to regulate stress even later in life.
Consistent responsiveness to a baby’s cries helps them develop a sense of security and trust in their caregivers. This can lead to a more secure attachment, which is crucial for emotional well-being, healthy social relationships and brain development.
Babies are not trying to manipulate their parents when they cry, they are communicating their needs and attempting to establish a connection. Responding to these cries is critical for building a strong bond and promoting healthy development.

08/12/2025

26/11/2025