Trans4mational Therapy Centre

Trans4mational Therapy Centre Providing effective solutions to everyday life issues with creative hypnotherapy techniques and help Trans4mational Therapy, Calming Life's RIpples

Trans4mational Therapy an intuitive style of therapy, a combination: Hypnotherapy, Psychotherapy and EFT (emotional freedom techniques). Helping people from all walks of life, live free of unwanted inhibition, anxiety, stress and depression.in essence learning how to manage our emotions and use our intuition to make life enjoyable and fun.

A reflective response on mindfulness and positive self-talk… unlocking the mystery of the mind!This post is written in r...
22/01/2026

A reflective response on mindfulness and positive self-talk… unlocking the mystery of the mind!

This post is written in response to a recent LinkedIn discussion on mindfulness and positive self-talk, particularly practices such as writing letters to one’s past or future self. While there is much credibility and genuine value in mindfulness-based approaches, far fewer people who promote them acknowledge—or openly discuss—their limitations and the potential pitfalls they may pose when used as a substitute for deeper psychological work.

Exercises such as writing to one’s past or future self can indeed be meaningful for some individuals, particularly those whose internal dialogue is not heavily constrained by entrenched emotional or sensory conditioning.

Clinical experience, however, consistently shows that much of human experience is governed less by conscious narrative than by habitual, autonomic responses encoded through sensory experience and implicit memory systems. These responses develop primarily in the service of psychological and social survival, rather than wellbeing or fulfilment.

Language—especially subconscious self-talk—is not neutral. Everyday speech is frequently framed through negation (“not bad”, “not too bad”), often delivered automatically rather than reflectively. While seemingly harmless, such linguistic patterns can subtly reinforce deficit-based self-appraisal, even when intentions are positive. For individuals whose internal dialogue has been shaped by trauma, chronic stress, or long-standing threat anticipation, motivational or reflective practices may feel compelling and may even provide short-term relief. Over time, however, they often fail to produce sustained change.

This does not invalidate mindfulness or positive self-talk. It highlights their limits. These limits are especially important for people who have lived for many years with low self-worth, diminished self-esteem, or what is commonly referred to as “self-love.” When repeated attempts at positive reframing fail, the unintended consequence can be increased self-blame: “If this works for others, why not for me?”

In over two decades of therapeutic practice, I have observed that meaningful and lasting change tends to occur not through repetition of aspiration, but through careful examination and reframing of deeply ingrained linguistic, emotional, and sensory patterns of self-experience. These patterns exist largely outside conscious awareness and are often mistaken for fixed beliefs. They are not fixed—but they are resistant to change without skilled, structured intervention.

This is where mindfulness and positive self-talk can become forms of psychotherapeutic shortcutting: well-intentioned attempts to bypass the deeper mechanisms that shaped the problem in the first place. Sustained psychological change usually requires more than reflective exercises or well-meaning advice. It requires trained support capable of identifying unconscious conditioning, sensory triggers, and habitual language structures—rather than interpreting distress through another person’s unexamined lens.

Mindfulness has value. It is not, however, a substitute for understanding how the mind learned to survive. To say “it is all in the mind” is only partly true. We are not our mind; we are the consequence of it. The mind itself is shaped by experience—direct, observed, and learned—much of which remains outside conscious awareness.

Understanding this distinction is often the difference between insight that feels reassuring and change that genuinely endures.

For those who work with mindfulness or use it personally, I’d be interested in how others navigate these limits in practice.

The Need to Be Seen: Why We Announce Our Absence.. A Performative Presence and the Fear of InvisibilityIn a world where ...
30/10/2025

The Need to Be Seen: Why We Announce Our Absence.. A Performative Presence and the Fear of Invisibility

In a world where silence feels like erasure, even our absence becomes a statement of existence.

In an age where visibility is mistaken for vitality, people have developed a curious compulsion — the need to announce their absence.

A simple coffee invitation illustrates the point. The host asks, “Who’s coming?”and half the replies read, Sorry, can’t make it. These responses add nothing practical, yet they satisfy something deeply psychological: the assurance of continued existence within the social field.

At its core, this is not about politeness; it’s about presence maintenance.
To remain unseen feels perilously close to being forgotten, and the human brain — still wired for tribal survival — interprets invisibility as exclusion.
A quick “sorry, can’t join” becomes a digital echo that says, I’m still part of the circle.

This same reflex manifests everywhere online. People post inspirational quotes, moral declarations, or fragments of borrowed wisdom — not always to inspire others, but to attach themselves to the identity implied by the post. Sharing a quote about resilience becomes a way of saying, I, too, am resilient. A post about kindness implies, I am kind. Through words and imagery, they attempt to own the philosophy rather than pursuing the necessary skill of developing the inner authenticity required to embody it.

What drives this behaviour is the quiet fear of perceptual invisibility—the sense that if one is not continually represented in the public narrative, one ceases to exist within it.

The self becomes a brand whose market value depends on constant exposure… to go unseen is to risk psychological erasure.

From a therapeutic perspective, this is not vanity; it is insecurity masquerading as engagement. The mind—an integral but separate aspect of who we think we are—seeks reassurance that it still matters… that it still registers in the eyes of others. Each declaration, each public gesture, becomes a small dose of existential confirmation.

Perhaps the healthier counter-movement is toward silent authenticity:
allowing our actions, not our announcements, to reveal who we are.
In doing so, presence becomes organic rather than performative and belonging arises not from being seen, but from being real.

At the heart of every performative act lies the quiet hope of being noticed.

© 2025 Thom Bush | Hypno-Psychotherapist, Trans4mational Therapy—All rights reserved.

15/10/2023

As we age, on certain days, thoughts appear, as if out of nowhere, as if without a reason but I believe there is almost always usually a reason. Perhaps the surfacing of a memory formed without an awareness of it even happening, nevertheless the threads or perhaps the fragments of a non conscious memory slowly gets excited into emotional expression.

Recently we watched the Tom Hanks film, A Man Called Otto. A very good film about the difficulty of facing life without someone exceptionally special to him, someone he’d spent the bulk of his life with, shared both the worst and best times with, his wife, and, in the aftermath of such loss and his desire to reunite with his wife, the way life brought to him something, something that could only be best described as an Angel, as if sent by his wife to say, it’s not your time!

You’ll have to watch the film for the rest!

Anyway, I saw this post and it pulled one of those strings, maybe because we just celebrated our 54th anniversary? Who knows.

To all those out there for whom this represents a prospective reality, in the hope it stirs an awareness of how special your nearest and dearest is to you. The best time to make you and them aware of how special they are; is while you still can!

The post:
A man married for 55 years describes true love. I would say he's qualified to explain it to us.

REFLECTION

"My parents were married for 55 years. One morning, my mom was going downstairs to make dad breakfast, she had a heart attack and fell. My father picked her up as best he could and almost dragged her into the truck. At full speed , without respecting traffic lights, he drove her to the hospital.

When he arrived, unfortunately she was no longer with us.

During the funeral, my father did not speak; his gaze was lost. He hardly cried.

That night, his children joined him. In an atmosphere of pain and nostalgia, we remembered beautiful anecdotes and he asked my brother, a theologian, to tell him where Mom would be at that moment. My brother began to talk about life after death, and guesses as to how and where she would be.

My father listened carefully. Suddenly he asked us to take him to the cemetery.

Dad!" we replied, "it's 11 at night, we can't go to the cemetery right now!"

He raised his voice, and with a glazed look he said:

"Don't argue with me, please don't argue with the man who just lost his wife of 55 years."

There was a moment of respectful silence, we didn't argue anymore. We went to the cemetery, we asked the night watchman for permission. With a flashlight we reached the tomb. My father caressed her, prayed and told his children, who watched the scene moved:

"It was 55 years... you know? No one can talk about true love if they have no idea what it's like to share life with a woman."

He paused and wiped his face. "She and I, we were together in that crisis. I changed jobs ..." he continued. "We packed up when we sold the house and moved out of town. We shared the joy of seeing our children finish their careers, we mourned the departure of loved ones side by side, we prayed together in the waiting room of some hospitals, we support each other in pain, we hug each Christmas, and we forgive our mistakes... Children, now it's gone, and I'm happy, do you know why?

Because she left before me. She didn't have to go through the agony and pain of burying me, of being left alone after my departure. I will be the one to go through that, and I thank God. I love her so much that I wouldn't have liked her to suffer..."

When my father finished speaking, my brothers and I had tears streaming down our faces. We hugged him, and he comforted us, "It's okay, we can go home, it's been a good day."

That night I understood what true love is; It is far from romanticism, it does not have much to do with eroticism, or with s*x, rather it is linked to work, to complement, to care and, above all, to the true love that two really committed people profess ".

Peace in your hearts.

11/10/2023

I don’t use fb much these days and you’d be amazed at how much time I have gained as a consequence.

While we are all blessed, or cursed, depending on your world view and ideology, we all have a 168 hour week. Comes with that, the realisation that as we age the number of 168 hour time slots diminishes. Nevertheless, I felt the post below was worthy of the time It takes to read it and even more so, the time you may take to reflect on it!

Having been self employed for 51 years and never once unemployed (meaning, always finding ways to earn my own living) and having been on the edge of the capitalist abyss (the abyss being financial ruin) several times over that period, I discovered that it never was the government’s responsibility to feed me, it was mine.

Consequently, I understand the question posed, i.e. how many people who can’t or won’t feed themselves, could Tom have fed If he gave those people the money, instead of buying his car. Instead, Tom focused on the many people he fed . . . Because he bought the car!

The Post!
A man named Tom Nicholson posted on his Facebook account the sports car that he had just bought and how a man approached and told him that the money used to buy this car could've fed thousands of less fortunate people.

His response to this man made him famous on the internet. READ his story as stated on Facebook below:

A guy looked at my Corvette the other day and said,

"I wonder how many people could have been fed for the money that sports car cost?

I replied I'm not sure;
it fed a lot of families in Bowling Green, Kentucky who built it,
it fed the people who make the tires,
it fed the people who made the components that went into it,
it fed the people in the copper mine who mined the copper for the wires,
it fed people in at Caterpillar who make the trucks that haul the copper ore.
It fed the trucking people who hauled it from the plant to the dealer
and fed the people working at the dealership and their families.

BUT,... I have to admit, I guess I really don’t know how many people it fed.
That is the difference between capitalism and the welfare mentality.
When you buy something, you put money in people’s pockets and give them dignity for their skills.
When you give someone something for nothing, you rob them of their dignity and self-worth.

Capitalism is freely giving your money in exchange for something of value.
Socialism is having the government take your money against your will and give it to someone else for doing nothing.

I think this is well written and well thought out
If you agree please send it to your friends.
If you don’t agree just delete it and have a nice day.

11/10/2023

I don’t use fb much these days and you’d be amazed at how much time I have gained as a consequence.

While we are all blessed, or cursed, depending on your world view and ideology, we all have a 168 hour week. Comes with that, the realisation that as we age the number of 168 hour time slots diminishes. However, the post below, I felt was worthy of the time It takes to read it and even more so, the time you may take to reflect on it!

Having been self employed for 51 years and never once been unemployed (meaning always finding ways to earn my own living), and, having been on the edge of the capitalist abyss several times over that period (aka financial ruin, it comes with risk), I discovered that it never was the government’s responsibility to feed me, it was mine.

Consequently, I fully understand the question posed, i.e. how many people who can’t or won’t feed themselves, could Tom have fed If he gave those people the money, instead of buying his car. Instead, Tom focused on the many people he fed . . . because he bought the car!

The Post!
A man named Tom Nicholson posted on his Facebook account the sports car that he had just bought and how a man approached and told him that the money used to buy this car could've fed thousands of less fortunate people.

His response to this man made him famous on the internet. READ his story as stated on Facebook below:

A guy looked at my Corvette the other day and said,

"I wonder how many people could have been fed for the money that sports car cost?

I replied I'm not sure;
it fed a lot of families in Bowling Green, Kentucky who built it,
it fed the people who make the tires,
it fed the people who made the components that went into it,
it fed the people in the copper mine who mined the copper for the wires,
it fed people in at Caterpillar who make the trucks that haul the copper ore.
It fed the trucking people who hauled it from the plant to the dealer
and fed the people working at the dealership and their families.

BUT,... I have to admit, I guess I really don’t know how many people it fed.
That is the difference between capitalism and the welfare mentality.
When you buy something, you put money in people’s pockets and give them dignity for their skills.
When you give someone something for nothing, you rob them of their dignity and self-worth.

Capitalism is freely giving your money in exchange for something of value.
Socialism is having the government take your money against your will and give it to someone else for doing nothing.

I think this is well written and well thought out
If you agree please send it to your friends.
If you don’t agree just delete it and have a nice day.

Hypnotherapy, Hypnosis and the magic or myth of the minds!When I first trained to be a hypnotherapist, some 22 years ago...
08/04/2022

Hypnotherapy, Hypnosis and the magic or myth of the minds!

When I first trained to be a hypnotherapist, some 22 years ago, I, like most other hypnotherapists warmly embraced the theoretical mystery of the subconscious mind, why wouldn’t I, I knew no better! However, as time progressed and I gained more experience I began to challenge such a theory. For me it all started when someone I know suffered a traumatic brain injury (TBI) and I observed significant changes in the way this person spoke, thought and behaved, in some sense, for a month or two, they became a different person. This led me to begin a quest that has never stopped, that of discovering more about our brain. A couple of extremely important case studies piqued my interest further, the first was Phineas Gage, a railroad worker whose tamping tool ploughed right thru his skull, following an explosion, taking bits of his brain with it. Early reports said that Gage was never again Gage; he changed beyond all recognition. However, a later report says that he recovered much of his functioning and was able to take on the role of a stagecoach driver in South America. A job that required a lot of planning, organising and skilful manoeuvring over rough terrain and, no doubt, certain passenger service skills. The importance of this is that even after a massive trauma, the plasticity of the brain is immense. The second case was patient HM (Henry Molaisen). A man who suffered very significant epileptic seizures, following an accident. Surgeons removed most of his hippocampal formation, the amygdala and possibly the uncus, the brain’s memory and emotional processors. Little was known about the function of the hippocampus at that time. Consequently, Henry provided them with more information than they expected and became the most studied patient in the history of neurology. His ability to form new memories was largely nonexistent, what is termed anterograde amnesia, the inability to make new memories. His memory of the past was also affected and he had virtually no memories of the 11 years prior to his surgery.

From there my research took me in all directions relating to the various brain structures, their names and their function and what emerged from that is an understanding that the brain is very logically illogical.

So, what about the minds? Well, one illustrative theory that many hypnotherapists use, is that of an iceberg, with the tip representing our conscious mind and below that, the subconscious. The problem with that theory is that no one has yet given a truly scientific validation of how the brain is structured into what we call ‘minds.’ What is more known, however, is that if certain brain regions get damaged, the functionality and behaviour of the person, or animal, changes. Similarly, it is known that deficiencies of minerals, vitamins and/or oxygen and water deprivation, drastically alter the way the brain and, subsequently, what we term the mind’s function. So, in that context our brain creates the experience we call life and what we call the mind, is merely a method (as of yet not properly known how or why), that creates awareness in us of what we are thinking, feeling and doing. Often, therapy aims to deal with the disparity between those two experiences. For example, a smoker will say “I fancy a cigarette and will proceed to smoke one. In that moment, they truly believe that it is them, as a sovereign individual, who wants the cigarette. This is the myth because it is their brain that wants the cigarette (ni****ne mostly), they are merely the dummy who has to go to the shop to buy them, store them and feed their brain when given the signal/instructions to do so. And this same psychology is involved in nearly everything that causes us some form of desire, angst or issue.

So, when a hypnotherapist claims to tap into their client’s subconscious mind, a medley of strange thoughts begin to permeate my mind! Firstly because the greatest minds in the field of neuroscience cannot agree on what the minds are and they know an awful lot about the brain. Secondly, because the minds are a scientific theory, they are not real anatomical structures, i.e. they are constructs and damned good ones at that. In fact, it would be challenging to talk about many things relating to behaviour, thoughts, feelings and experience without reference to the concept of the mind. However, let’s be clear, that every feeling, thought and behavioural response, is a consequence of brain function, a myriad of trillions of second by second neurochemical reactions.

Contextually, therefore, the brain is primarily an algorithmic sensory processor, it functions relative to its sensory input, the integration of that information and both programmed and novel responses to that sensory information. The algorithms form the function of remembering individual and grouped previous or similar experiences and these play out in lightning-fast fashion. The only reason we can speak or write so proficiently is that the brain has stored every word, its meaning, when, where and contextually how to use them, as well as the exact muscle combinations required to annunciate or type every word we use. What we call the conscious mind, is basically our ability to be aware of what we are saying, doing or feeling, which enables us verbally and nonverbally to pose questions for the brain to answer or to learn new things. The ability to do the things we know comes about as a consequence of the activation of certain memories or networks of memories, schemas or memory traces.

So, the mystery is, if hypnotherapists, can’t actually tap into a prospectively anatomically nonexistent subconscious mind, then how do the changes we so obviously observe in a client's behaviour happen? Maybe we should start by taking a deeper look at what hypnosis is? Primarily Hypnosis is a word, the nomenclature of observable experience, a term coined by Scottish surgeon James Braid, around 1842. He believed its phenomena to be a sleep-like state (following on, in part, from the work of Franz Anton Mesmer ( mesmerism)) and as Hypnos was the Greek God of sleep, it sounded both logical and catchy. While he later recanted his understanding of the phenomena, believing it was not a sleep-like state, modern research, on both memory and sleep, pretty much confirmed he was right after all. Where it gets confusing, relative to the way hypnosis and the changes it brings about are perceived, is that we are capable of bringing about change through many different methodologies and ways. For example, psychotherapy, counselling, CBT, Gestalt, REBT, NLP etc. all bring about varying forms of change. Sometimes seemingly making a conscious decision to change (willpower) can do it too, as can prayer but this is not specifically hypnosis. Nevertheless, following on from any therapeutic session, hypnotic-like processes are at play when we sleep, for it is in sleep that memory consolidation (new memories) and reconsolidation (updating existing memories) take place. As the sleeping person goes into varying neural oscillations (brainwaves) as they go through the stages of sleep, this consolidation and reconsolidation occur naturally and progressively during nighttime sleep. Similarly, in hypnosis, the client enters a trance-like state, akin to nighttime sleep. Each person goes through these brainwave stages (see image below) during both day and night, albeit differently. At night while asleep and dreaming, our brain oscillates through these wavelike experiences and while we are asleep we are predominantly in theta brainwave states. Theta waves emanate from the hippocampus, hence the memory processing and storage begins, starting in the form of a temporary, labile state and eventually to changed state called long term memory. So the changes that occur through hypnosis work seamlessly in a similar but more directed way, than in natural sleep states. Additional layers of complexity occur by virtue of our different memory systems, e.g. explicit (declarative) and implicit (non-declarative). A separate article on memory in the making! Although simply put, explicit memory is cognitively/intellectually aligned and in the realm of consciousness and implicit is emotionally aligned to feel, fear (fight or flight) and love (wellness and inner peace). Delta brainwaves are akin to a goal-directed restorative function of sleep, where, among other things, the brain heals and restores itself and the body and when experienced in hypnosis, can create extremely intense feelings so relaxation.

So, in summary, life is an ongoing process from breath to breath, complicated by what we call thoughts. Thoughts are the consequence of an outer awareness of an inner experience stimulated by sensory perceptions and experienced as feelings that then activate various memories that elicit a motor response we call behaviour. Behaviour then stimulates physical feelings that go on to arouse more thoughts and on and on it goes. Hypnosis and therapy, combined, equal hypnotherapy have the potential to be a disrupter that breaks the cycle of sensory processing and integration leading to different outcomes. The magic is in the way hypnosis changes the expression of memory the myth is in the belief that it is the mind that changes, it is the brain that changes and as a consequence of that, an awareness of an alternative reality emerges.

Therapy often appears as a somewhat mysterious process, even more so with hypnotherapy because what you think is the pro...
27/12/2021

Therapy often appears as a somewhat mysterious process, even more so with hypnotherapy because what you think is the problem, is often merely the observable manifestation of the problem!

Many anxiety issues fall into this category, in that, anxiety is not so much the problem but rather it is the consequence of the problem. To confuse matters further, often what we state as being the cause of the problem, is mostly the cognitive/intellectual iteration of successive non-conscious layers of memory consolidation and reconsolidation (this is something I explain in more detail during the consultation).

The aim of therapy, therefore, is to get the client to a position of non-intellectual enlightenment, albeit with some level of conscious awareness. Mostly this occurs after the last session. In the sense, what we call ‘the end of therapy,’ is the beginning of a new experience of life!

For more information go here:

https://www.trans4mationaltherapy.com/index.php/article/life-after-therapy

In the anticipation of things getting better, as we begin to normalise life in the aftermath of Covid, and, despite the ...
17/12/2021

In the anticipation of things getting better, as we begin to normalise life in the aftermath of Covid, and, despite the growing number of prophets of doom, I foresee people getting on with life. Just as they did in the aftermath of the 1918 - 1921 Spanish flu, which, incidentally, was far worse, infected and killed many more than Covid has.

Part of that, "getting on with life" will involve travelling abroad by aeroplanes once again, which will be a good thing. Obviously, there will be many that disagree with that because of the effect of air travel on the subject of climate change, which amounts to approximately 3% of global emissions. Of course, our planet is important and, as they say, there is No Planet B, but there is such a thing as personal responsibility. And with that, the ability to more than offset one's carbon footprint by other means.

Basically, I believe that if we each do our bit for the health of our planet, we will not need to rely on or blame governments to solve the problem which we, essentially, are creating. Almost everything that is creating excess CO2 in our atmosphere eventually points back to us. From the food we eat and cook, the means of energy we use (gas, electricity, coal, oil), in one way or another satisfies our growing needs.

So what can we do?
1. If you smoke, stop it (hypnotherapy can help you) because the to***co industry has a huge carbon footprint and that doesn't even account for the emissions that leave your mouth when smoking!
2. If you eat meat, cut it down, or better still, cut it out too. Animals produce huge amounts of methane gas when they emit gas. They need feeding too and that kills the ground (a major source of CO2 intake). Meat, beef mostly, is a major source of deforestation too, creating a double whammy.
3. Travel by car, cut it down too, take a bus, walk more or get a bike.
4. Eat fish, again cut it down or out. Overfishing poses a far greater risk than the use of fossil fuels.
5. Drink alcohol or take drugs, again cut it down or out. These use huge resources (manufacturing and distribution) that pollute the atmosphere as well as take up huge amounts of ground that could be better used to create woods or forests or grow food crops
6. Waste less, use more and recycle as much as you can and, as often as you can, take your own bags when you go shopping.

So, when you have done all that you possibly can, you can feel somewhat justified in taking off to some exotic climes or visiting relatives or friends overseas.

Bottom line, if only 6 billion people out of 7.8 billion do all that they can to make our planet healthier, they will achieve a lot more than governments can, simply because most of the stuff that is polluting our planet involves our daily needs or wants!

Getting to the point of this post, air travel. I anticipate an increase in the incidence of aviophobia (fear of flying) as air travel moves towards pre-Covid times and I have developed a rather unique way of helping people with this condition. To discover more about my treatment for Aviophobia, please go here: https://www.trans4mationaltherapy.com/pages/mobile-links/treatment-conditions/fear-of-flying

12/10/2021

Life is best lived by setting examples!

The Father and his Son

A son took his elderly father to a restaurant for dinner. His father being very old and weak with arthritic hands, whilst eating his meal he dropped food on the front of his shirt and trousers.

Most of the other guests in the restaurant watched him in some disgust thinking why would you bring an elderly man to the restaurant who made such a mess of himself whilst eating, however, during the meal his son remained very calm.

After they finished eating, his son who was not at all embarrassed, quietly took him to the bathroom where he wiped the food his shirt and trousers, removed the stains with a damp towel, then combed his hair and fitted his spectacles firmly on his nose.

When they came out of the bathroom, the other guests in the restaurant were watching them in deadly silence, not able to grasp how someone could embarrass themselves publicly like that. The son then paid the bill for their meal and started walking out with his father.

At that time, another older man amongst the guests called out to the son and asked him . . . 'Don’t you think you have left something behind?'

The son replied . . . 'No sir, I haven’t.'

The older man replied . . . 'Yes, I really think you have! You have left a wonderful lesson for every son and great hope for every father as they get older.'

Author Unknown

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