The Funky Hempies LLC

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The Funky Hempies LLC

The Funky Hempies is a new CBD health and wellness startup. Our wellness is revolutionary.

Our healing is essential.

thefunkyhempies.com

12/24/2025

“Wishing You a Funky, Peace-Filled Christmas.”

This season, we’re sending love to every home, every family, and every soul looking for a little more peace in a busy world.

Christmas isn’t about rushing.
It’s about resting.
Reflecting.
And reconnecting with what really matters.

From our Funky family to yours —
thank you for choosing real CBD, real care, and real calm this year.

May your days be lighter, your nights be restful, and your heart be full as we close out this season and look ahead to a brighter, calmer 2026.

Merry Christmas from The Funky Hempies. 🎄💛
Stay grounded. Stay grateful. Stay Funky.

🎄

“Take a moment, breathe deep, and enjoy the season — peace looks good on you.”

Source: .0

🔖

HolidayCalm SoulfulSeason EarthCraftedCBD StayFunkyStayTrue GratefulAndGrounded

12/17/2025

Merry Funky Hempies Wednesday!

Source:

12/12/2025

How about some “ Sweet Love” heading into the weekend.

Source:

12/10/2025

🎄🌿

“This Holiday, Give Yourself the Gift of Peace.
2026 Needs the Calmest Version of You.”

The holidays are beautiful…
but let’s be honest — they can be a whole lot.

From the rush…
to the noise…
to the family dynamics that deserve their own Netflix series…
sometimes you just need a moment to yourself.

That’s where we come in.

The Funky Hempies CBD is your Holiday Stress Reset —
crafted to help you breathe deeper, sleep better, and step into 2026 with clarity, calm, and confidence.

No fake highs.
No shady blends.
Just real, earth-crafted CBD helping you stay steady in a season that can get a little too funky. 🎄😌

Here’s to peace today, joy this week, and a smoother, brighter 2026.

Stay calm. Stay grounded. Stay Funky.

🚀

“Tap now and start your Holiday Stress Reset —
2026 is calling for a calmer you.”

🔖

12/03/2025

“Meet the Funky Family — Wellness for Real People.”

Today, we’re celebrating the folks who make The Funky Hempies what it is —
everyday people searching for peace, rest, relief, and truth.

Our customers aren’t chasing a high.
They’re chasing balance.

They’re parents, teachers, workers, caregivers, creators, believers, thinkers —
grown folks who know life comes at you fast
and peace is something you choose.

So as the CBD world shifts and the fake stuff disappears,
we want to introduce what real wellness looks like:

✨ Calm without sedation
✨ Relief without fog
✨ Clarity without chaos
✨ Healing without hype

Welcome to the Funky Family —
a community of people choosing truth, peace, and earth-crafted CBD that keeps life smooth.

If you’re here, you belong here. 💛🌿

“Tap to follow our Funky Family stories —
real CBD, real people, real peace.”

Source: **piesllc

🔖

11/28/2025

“Black Friday Just Got a Whole Lot Funkier…
’Cause the FAKE CBD Brands Got Shut Down).

Look… we didn’t want to say anything.

But with the new federal h**p laws kicking in,
the fake CBD companies are disappearing faster than your auntie’s Sweet Potato Pie on Thanksgiving.

Meanwhile, The Funky Hempies?
Still here.
Still clean.
Still honest.
Still funky.

So this Black Friday + Cyber Monday, we’re celebrating the right way:

🌿 20% OFF every product (Nov 28–Dec 1)
✨ USE CODE: SWEETPOTATO20

😌 No fake highs
🌱 No shady formulas
🧡 Just real, earth-crafted CBD made for wellness, calm, and soul

While other companies were out here trying to launch folks into orbit,
we were helping people relax, breathe, sleep, and stay grounded.

That’s why we don’t need loopholes —
We’ve always been legit.

Treat yourself to CBD that won’t get seized by the government before Christmas. 😎✨

🚀 CTA: Buy The Real Deal!

“Tap to shop the REAL CBD — and don’t forget to use SWEETPOTATO20 before it’s gone!”

Source: **piesllc

🔖

11/25/2025

“A Funky Tuesday Reminder: Gratitude Feels Better When It’s Real.”

This Thanksgiving week, we’re grateful for one thing above all:

the people who choose real CBD over the fake shortcuts.

With the new federal h**p rules finally clearing out the counterfeits,
it feels good knowing the community that rocks with The Funky Hempies
has always valued:

🌿 Real relief
🌱 Real craftsmanship
💛 Real ingredients
✨ Real integrity

No synthetic highs.
No shady blends.
No gimmicks.

Just earth-crafted CBD made with love, care, and the groove that keeps you grounded.

Stay thankful. Stay calm. Stay Funky.

Happy Thanksgiving week, family. 🧡🌿

“Experience the CBD that stays true—no matter the season.”

🔖

11/19/2025

“Midweek Check-In: The Rules Just Changed.
Our Standards Didn’t.”

With the new federal h**p policy kicking in, the CBD world is shaking…
but The Funky Hempies?
We’ve been rock-solid from the start.

No counterfeit blends.
No synthetic highs.
No chemical tricks.

Just clean, honest, earth-crafted CBD the way it was always meant to be.

Midweek reminder:
When the fake stuff gets pushed out, the real ones rise up.

Stay calm.
Stay clear.
Stay Funky. 🌿✨

🚀 CTA: Give Us A Shot!

“Discover why real CBD hits different — shop The Funky Hempies.”

Source: **piesllc

🔖

11/14/2025

“The Weekend’s Here. The Fake Stuff Isn’t.”

As the new h**p regulations kick into gear, the industry is finally waking up —
authentic CBD is the only groove that’s gonna last.

At The Funky Hempies, we’ve been on that path since day one:

🔸

11/12/2025

“While Others Get Shut Down, We’re Just Getting Started.”

The new U.S. budget bill may have shaken up the h**p industry — but it’s finally separating the phony from the funky.

At The Funky Hempies, we’ve always stayed true to our groove:

✅ Crafted with integrity
✅ Lab-tested with

11/07/2025

“Turn Up the Groove. Turn Down the Stress.”

“You’ve flown through life’s fast lane. Now it’s time to drop the pedal — and pick up the peace.

Let The Funky Hempies’ premium CBD power your comeback to calm: no fuzz, no fluff — just real-chill vibes that last.

Ready to land softly? Tap the link-in-bio and reclaim your rhythm. ✌️”

✅ Call-to-Action ? Try Us!

“Click to explore our complete collection → find your perfect groove”

Source: **piesllc

📱

Address

12850 Highway 9 North, Ste-600/161
Alpharetta, GA
30004

Website

http://thefunkyhempies.com/

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