11/05/2025
My favorite tips for helping your toddler/older kiddos adjust to a new sibling:
- during pregnancy, talk to them about it often! Discuss what newborns are like, and what their role will be as the big sibling. Role model with a baby doll if you can!
- when you see them for the first time after baby’s birth, greet them without the new baby in your arms. Give them some one on one reconnection time, until they’re ready to meet Baby. For some kids this is faster than others, that’s okay!
- when you have to attend to Baby’s needs, use baby-centered language, rather than you-centered. For example, instead of “I need to feed the baby now”, try “the baby needs to eat now”. This helps reduce feelings of jealousy or rivalry.
- utilize friends and family to take your older kid(s) on special outings to get their wiggles out. For most kids, they’ll think it’s a treat to get quality time with other adults! An hour at the park can do wonders for everyone’s mood.
- create time and space for one-on-one time with each parent, daily in the beginning of you can. It’s hard sharing a parents attention with a tiny human who can’t play with you yet!
- it’s everyones job to care for Baby! There’s tasks big sibling can do, and many that mom or dad have to do. Siblings can hand you things, help change diapers, and give love! Older siblings can give baby a pacifier, help hold a bottle, or play with toys with Baby. These are all important jobs! ❤️
But please remember, most siblings will go through an adjustment period. They’ll probably regress in some areas, or have big feelings about things they normally wouldn’t. I think the best thing we can do as parents is just meet them where they’re at, be okay with it, and know it won’t last forever! Even if that means your 5yo wants to be swaddled and suck on a pacifier 😆 i promise it’s normal and won’t last forever!