11/25/2025
Is this you?
You say you have “high standards” and “don’t tolerate nonsense”…
but somehow you keep ending up in the same kind of relationships.
Romantic or platonic, it looks like this:
You’re the strong friend, the therapist, the planner… but when you need support, everyone is suddenly “busy.”
You tell yourself, “It’s not that deep,” while your chest feels heavy after yet another one-sided conversation.
You notice red flags early, but you stay because “they’ve been through a lot” or “they’re not usually like this.”
You over-explain your needs, then feel guilty for having them at all.
You call it “loyalty,” but deep down you know it’s fear of being alone.
And here’s the hardest part to admit:
You keep choosing people who confirm the story that you are “too much,” “not enough,” or only lovable when you’re useful.
That’s not self-love.
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