12/27/2025
Countless women opened up to their abuser's mom only to discover she's actually his number one defender and excuse-maker.
You thought you'd found an ally. Someone who knew him before you did, who might understand the patterns you're seeing, who could help or at least validate what you're experiencing. So you confided in her. You told her about his behavior. You showed her the red flags. You hoped she'd be on your side.
Instead, she made excuses. "That's just how he is." "He's been through a lot." "You need to be more patient with him." Suddenly every abusive action has a justification. Every boundary he violates gets explained away. Every time he hurts you becomes somehow your fault for not understanding him better.
Because here's the truth: she raised him. She created the monster or at minimum, she ignored the warning signs for years. Admitting he's abusive means admitting she failed. So instead, she protects him. She enables him. She gaslights you on his behalf. And when you finally leave, she'll comfort him and tell everyone you were the problem.
That's where he learned it. That's why he thinks his behavior is acceptable. Because the person who was supposed to hold him accountable spent his whole life making excuses instead.
So stop looking for validation from the woman who taught him that his actions don't have consequences.
She's not your ally. She's his greatest accomplice. And she'll choose him every single time.
