Coach MER Life and Holistic Well-being Coaching

03/14/2026

When someone is sick or nearing the end of their life, we feel the urge to fix, to explain, to ease what cannot be undone. But they are not a problem to solve, they are a human being wishing to be seen.

Sometimes it is enough to simply walk through their door and sit. Let your presence be what reminds them they are not alone. There is no need to bring answers to questions that were never asked, no need for a polished performance.

And if you find yourself wondering whether you are doing enough, remember this: you do not have to arrive with solutions. You do not have to try so hard. Your presence is not small. It is not secondary. It is a gift.

You are enough. Just show up. Sometimes that is all that someone else needs.

xo
Gabby
www.thehospiceheart.net



03/14/2026

The Exhale

It begins long before the last breath
Long before the room goes still
It starts in that first moment
when a diagnosis enters the air
and something inside you
quietly tightens.

From there, the waiting starts
You hold your breath without meaning to
through each update
each slow change
each “let’s see what tomorrow brings”
You learn the landscape of decline
by instinct
listening for shifts no one else hears
showing up again and again
because love holds you in place.

Caring for someone who is dying
creates its own rhythm
a steady, quiet bracing
for whatever comes next
It reshapes your days
your nights
your lungs
You try to stay ready
even when ready isn’t possible.

And then their last breath comes
Soft
Final
Not dramatic, just true.

But the breath that breaks you
isn’t theirs
It’s yours
That long, trembling exhale
you didn’t know you were holding
A release wrapped in relief
in grief
in the sharp ache
of a chapter closing.

We think the final breath
belongs to the dying.

But the truth is
the real ending is ours
the exhale that follows
the one that carries
the weight, the love, the loss
and the letting go.

That exhale…
our exhale
that’s the moment
it all becomes real.

xo
Gabby

You can find this poem here:
https://www.thehospiceheart.net/post/the-exhale

03/14/2026

Have you ever wondered what a death doula is, or felt curious about the work and wanted to learn more?

A death doula, also known as an end-of-life doula, is someone who offers compassionate, non-medical support to individuals and families as they approach the end of life. While many people associate doulas with the final days at the bedside, the role is much broader than that.

You might like my class, “At the Bedside,” which is an introduction to becoming an end-of-life doula. Whether you are curious about this role or are already doing this work, this class would be good for you.

The next class is Sunday, May 3rd
10-12pm Pacific Time via Zoom

In this class, we will explore what death doulas can and can’t do, and clear up some common misconceptions. For example, doulas are not state-licensed, mandated, or regulated professionals, and the word “certified” can often create confusion. We will talk openly about what that means and how people can enter this field.

We will look at the ways doulas can support others long before the final moments of life, from companionship and guidance to helping people navigate aging, illness, and life transitions. This work isn’t one-size-fits-all, each person brings their own gifts, presence, and strengths.

This class is an opportunity not only to learn about the field, but also to look inward. You may discover that the qualities you naturally carry, your ability to listen, sit with others, support families, or simply be present, are exactly the kinds of gifts that are needed in this work.

The class fee is $25. If finances would prevent you from attending, please email me to inquire about a scholarship.

At the end of class I will share links to the doula training programs I recommend.
Additional resources are included below.

If you have ever felt drawn to supporting others through life’s most vulnerable transitions, this class may help you better understand the many ways that presence, compassion, and human connection can make a difference.

See you there.
xo
Gabby

Email me for a scholarship:
thehospiceheart@gmail.com

Link to learn more about this class and register for it:
https://www.thehospiceheart.net/at-the-bedside

This is a podcast conversation between a death doula (me) and a birth doula:
https://bestlifebestdeath.com/podcast-89/

Link to the book, “The Doula Tool Kit”:
https://www.amazon.com/Doula-Tool-Kit-End-Life/dp/B0CNN5LJMS

03/14/2026

A reflection on end-of-life care…

There is something I wish more people understood about hospice and end-of-life care.

When someone receives a terminal diagnosis and hospice is suggested, it is because the disease process is already unfolding in ways that medicine can no longer stop or reverse. By the time someone begins receiving end-of-life care, their body has already begun the work of letting go.

We cannot change the outcome, none of us holds that power. Our role, whether we are a member of the hospice team, end-of-life doulas, caregivers, or family members sitting quietly at the bedside, is to advocate, to comfort, and to reduce suffering wherever we can. We ease pain, calm symptoms, listen closely, and tend to the physical, emotional and spiritual weight that often arrives in these moments. Sometimes, when comfort replaces crisis, people are gifted a little more time, which no one could have predicted, but time is never something we can promise.

In this work, we are not the driver of the bus. The course of the illness is not ours to control. Instead, we sit beside the passenger and make sure they are not traveling alone. We show up with presence, with care, and with love.

My hope for every person who is dying is that they are cared for well, that they feel seen and held, and that their landing is soft. At the end of the day, I truly believe that anyone who is providing end-of-life care has this goal in mind. 

xo
Gabby
www.thehospiceheart.net

01/23/2026

Gary Sturgis - Surviving Grief

01/23/2026

06/02/2024

https://www.penguinrandomhouse.com/books/741146/the-chair-and-the-valley-by-banning-lyon-foreword-by-jonathan-eig/?ref=mariashriversundaypaper.com

An incredible memoir about one man's journey to heal from trauma through chosen family, friendship, and nature. AN OPEN FIELD PUBLICATION FROM MARIA SHRIVER Banning Lyon was an average 15-year-old, living...

06/02/2024

https://www.mariashriversundaypaper.com/karen-spencer-end-of-life-care/

My mother died of cancer in 2011, when I was in my 30s. My father had died a decade earlier, and most of our family lived far away. So even though I lived in Boston and my mom was in Denver, we had to figure out how I could help