Dr. Cat Meyer, LMFT

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Beverly Hills, CA
Dr. Cat Meyer, LMFT

Sex and couples therapy viewed from a holistic approach for change. It's my mission to help change To learn more about her work, go to: CatMeyer.com

Dr. Cat Meyer, PsyD, LMFT is a licensed psychotherapist sex therapist, relationship coach, partner yoga for intimacy instructor, meditation guide, and reiki practitioner dedicated to evolving the relationship we have surrounding sexuality. Dr. Cat recognizes the strong link between body, mind, and spirit and uses this knowledge in her private practice, transformational retreats, and speaking events.

02/18/2026

I was making love to my partner. But I couldn’t stay.

Black curtains at the edges of my vision.
A distance from my own body.
Present, but not present.
There, but somewhere else.
And then he stopped.

Not with frustration.
Not with a sigh of annoyance.

He leaned in and whispered: “I don’t know where you’ve gone, but it’s okay. You’re safe. You don’t have to do anything different. I’m here with you.”

And I burst into tears.

I had never had a partner attune to me like that before.
Before, they would push past whatever was happening to get to the end.
Before, there would be judgment—or worse, the self-blame that made me responsible for their wounded sense of self.
Before, I would need to quickly pull myself together, force a resolution, just to preserve the “connection” and keep the peace.

But this was different.

He didn’t need me to be different.
He didn’t need me to explain.
He just stayed.

And something in me that had been clenched for decades began to soften.

This is what I’ve come to understand:
Often, our wounds were created in relationship— a disruption, a betrayal, a moment when someone couldn’t meet us.
So it makes sense that healing happens in relationship too.

Not alone on a meditation cushion.
Not just in a therapist’s office.
But in the alive, messy, vulnerable space between two people who are learning to welcome each other’s parts.

This is what IFS work in partnership looks like:
Both people on the same team.
Both learning their own protections, their own vulnerabilities.
Checking their own parts that mistranslate a reaction as personal to them.
Both building the capacity to meet each other’s tender places with calm.
Curiosity. Patience. Presence.
No agenda to fix or change.

I’m not saying it’s easy. It’s not.
It requires two people willing to do their own work and hold space for the other.

But when we take the time to create this— it’s the most beautiful, restorative, expansive experience.
Everyone benefits.

NOTE: sometimes dissociation isn’t trauma related. See my post: it’s not always trauma for more insight.

02/13/2026

My favorite Valentines gift is clear communication of desires 💘😌

02/12/2026

Finding space for grief and pleasure.
If we only stay in the heaviness— the pain, the anger, the fear— without inviting in expansion,
we will slowly deteriorate.

Grief clears space.
But pleasure is what fills us back up.
We tell ourselves:
I can’t feel good while I’m grieving.
Joy would betray the pain.

But pleasure isn’t betrayal.
It’s medicine.

Pleasure activates ventral vagal—safety, connection, openness.
It lowers cortisol.
Releases oxytocin.
Reduces inflammation.
It builds capacity to hold hard things without breaking.

Grief and pleasure are dance partners.
One clears.
One restores.
One deepens.
One softens.
Both essential.
Neither abandoned.

You are allowed to grieve and still let yourself feel good.
That’s not betrayal.
That’s how you stay whole while you heal.

02/09/2026

When I work with women, I hear the same thing over and over:
“I should be over this by now.” “Why can’t I just be present?” “What’s wrong with me?”

They’re irritated with their bodies for “not doing what they want them to do.”

They want to be present—truly, desperately—but they can’t understand why they keep leaving.
Why they feel flat.
Why they dissociate during intimacy.
Why shame keeps showing up uninvited.

They tell me about how much therapy they’ve done. How safe their current partner is. How happy they are with the rest of their lives.
And yet. They still check out during s—x.

WTF?

I get it. Because that was me.

Years ago, I was working with a therapist who was truly brilliant. But he kept pointing to my extreme fatigue and sadness as “parts” I still needed to heal and integrate.
So we did the work. A lot of it.

And there were parts—formed in childhood, familiar with exhaustion, familiar with leaving. I got to know them. Befriend them.
And still. I was dissociating.

Years into therapy, we discovered toxic mold in my house. Mold that had been quietly wrecking my hormones the entire time.

That discovery cracked something open for me.
I started to understand: Sometimes the root isn’t a memory that needs processing. It’s a body that needs replenishing.

If you’ve done the inner work and you’re still leaving your body— it might be time to look at what else is running in the background.

Hormones. Nervous system depletion. Functional freeze. Nutritional deficiencies.

Not instead of therapy or relationship to parts or trauma work—in addition to.

Healing isn’t one road.
And presence requires more than just processing.
It requires a body resourced enough to stay.

Read about the 4 causes in the carousel ↴

⭐️ Did you have an experience similar?
⭐️ Got anything to add or share?

02/07/2026

So many women carry quiet shame in their bodies.

In this clip, I’m joined by Suzannah Weiss as we talk about how pain, unmet expectations, and systemic limits can turn into self-blame especially around childbirth, bre.astfeeding, and women’s bodies.

When someone can’t bre.astfeed.
When birth isn’t what they hoped for.
When pleasure feels out of reach.

It’s easy for the story to become: my body failed me.

But the truth is more complex and more compassionate. Knowing what’s possible can be empowering, and it can create pressure when those options aren’t accessible, safe, or realistic. Many of the limits women face aren’t personal at all. They’re systemic. They’re structural. And they’re beyond individual control.

You didn’t fail.
Your body isn’t broken.
And honoring your experience matters as much as imagining what’s possible.

🎧 Listen to Episode 178 of S.x Love Psych3delics for the full conversation on pain, pleasure, and releasing shame from the body.

🤍 Save this if you’ve ever blamed yourself for something that wasn’t your fault.
💬 Share with someone who needs gentleness today.

02/05/2026

What if there was no clock on pleasure?

In this clip, Suzannah Weiss and I talk about the pressure women feel to reach org^&m quickly, or at all—and how that pressure can actually shut pleasure down.

When you’re rushed, comparing yourself, or chasing a goal, the body tightens. Stress replaces curiosity. And suddenly pleasure feels far away. The truth is, there is no standard timeline. No benchmark you need to meet. And you’re not broken if or**sm is challenging, inconsistent, or unavailable at times.

Pleasure thrives in safety, patience, and permission, not performance.

🎧 Be sure to tune into the full episode of S.x Love Psych3delics 178 with Suzannah Weiss

🤍 Save this if you’ve ever felt rushed in your body.
💬 Share with someone who needs permission to slow down.

02/03/2026

Ero.t!c Innocence
Is the experience of coming back to the innate truth that our sensing, s- xual, embodied essence is our natural state of being.
It is an innocent expression of our bodies in pleasure,
In play,
In exploration
No shame. No fear.
No agenda to “accomplish” or reach an outcome.
No performance for the looks or aesthetic.
No intent to take, exploit, preserve one’s safety in exchange for another’s.

The horrid truth about our society is that innocence can leave us vulnerable if we haven’t the resources or development of power in our own protection and discernment, yet.

The times I felt so free in my own ero.tic!sm were the times I felt so safe.
In my own lifetime, due to multiple violations and SA as a child and young adult,
That safety and the discernment of who and what contributed to it had to be relearned.

There may be a part of us starving for innocence again and as a result overrides the discernment of those we are inviting to be involved, contributing to the absence of safety in a space.

There may be a part of us starving for safety again and as a result creates rigidity, contributing to the absence of pleasure and exploration.

And there may be a dance of polarization between these parts. One pulling in the direction of safety and the other pulling in the direction of freedom, leaving us in lockstep.

The work that I do in my retreats is locating and developing a relationship with these parts.
Not necessarily getting rid of one to favor the other—in the world we live in, they are both necessary.
The task is learning to tune into their message, recognize their own perspectives + wisdom, and recognize what they need from us in these circumstances.
It can be quiet and nuanced—this is where the translation can become challenging.
What does the information I’m sensing mean?
Developing intuition is a skill in listening.

My upcoming retreat EXHALE is happening in March in Malibu.
DM me if you are feeling the desire to join.

01/29/2026

In this short clip, I sit down with Suzannah Weiss to explore how women are conditioned to endure discomfort, stay quiet about pain, and accept suffering as “normal”, especially in our bodies, our s3*uality, and our health.

We talk about chronic pain, medical dismissal, l.bido shifts, and the cultural myths that tell us to ignore our symptoms and keep going. When we stop ignoring it, pain becomes information, not something to push through, but something asking for care and attention.✨

🎧 Be sure to tune into the full episode of S.x Love Psych3delics 178 with Suzannah Weiss.

01/28/2026

This book took three years and also an entire lifetime.

It holds my journey through intimacy and love through the lens of yogic philosophy— which was and still is one of the pivotal traditions in my own healing journey.

Poetry has always been my channel— the place where pain becomes legible, where discovery finds its shape.

The ancients knew: poets are not just creators. They are conduits. In Mesopotamia, Greece, India— poetry was prophecy, incantation, prayer. Before literacy, it was how we remembered everything: history, law, lineage, gods.

Before widespread literacy, poetry was how we remembered. History, lineage, law— all held in rhythm and rhyme. Hymns carried religion. Epics carried culture. Homer taught ethics. Gilgamesh taught grief. Long, sung narratives connected communities to their gods and to each other.

Poetry was never ornament. It was a vital necessity, shaping the identity of ancient civilizations.

What’s powerful about the process for the writer is the raw stream that moves through— unfiltered, unedited, alive.

What’s powerful for the reader is the recognition. The moment you see yourself in someone else’s words. The moment the feeling you couldn’t name finally has a name.

I’ve finished my second book:
Between Midnights and the Dawn

It’s about the dark night of the soul. Grief as an erotic process. Not something to slog through— but a passage of aliveness. The sacred undoing before the becoming.
It contains the processes I moved through with grief on the personal and collective levels.

In those times I felt helpless in the state of it all, I found art an action I could put action in.

Coming early summer. Every page holds my whole heart.

Book above can be found on Amazon 💘
Do you write poetry?

01/26/2026

We say we want safe love. But do we know what that means?

There is love that keeps you underwater— peak experiences measured by the height of the fall.

And there is love that finds you in the bathroom, brushing teeth.
On the floor, kissing cheeks raw.
Ordinary moments that somehow hold everything.

To call someone home, first ask: What was home like?

I didn’t notice that the familiarity I kept choosing was anxiety.
Dissociation.
The comfort of hiding beside someone lost in their own shame.

Real home— my skin safe inside their skin— felt foreign.
I almost walked past it.

They said secure love would be boring.
But boring, it turns out, is where the magic hides.

Not because something happens— but because presence grows so deep you finally see what was always there.

We all want this.
Are we letting it find us?

The Welsh word cwtch means more than a hug. It’s an embrace that becomes a shelter. A place where nothing can reach you. When someone gives you a true cwtch, you are, for that moment, completely safe. Completely home.

01/22/2026

This time last year, I was hosting my last Exhale retreat.
It was also as I was beginning to date Tim (happy 1 year babe).
It was also two weeks after I had to evacuate from my home in Topanga/Los Angeles.

I had to make a quick decision to move the retreat out to the desert, because a) the original location was IN the fire zone
b) the energy of LA was chaotic—not an environment for ones to come to work on healing.

Ironically, the retreat was called EXHALE
And we couldn’t even INHALE without a mask. 😷

So here I was, in s.xy logistics mode to move EVERYTHING.
And I couldn’t even access my own home because the yard had burned up.

I could have collapsed.
I could have cancelled.
I could have taken a break from all of my work to focus on my own health and home.

All of that would have been valid.
But instead, I practiced what I teach
And I EXHALED, again and again
As I took each day of uncertainty of my home and the big task of the retreat to show up in the best possible way of service.

I observed myself use the same skills and practices I teach at this retreat.
Tuning into my body intelligence and the various parts at play
Not acting out of urgency, but slowing myself down
Integrating playfulness
Enlisting support
Softening my body
Taking vulnerable accountability where I made mistakes.

See, this retreat isn’t just about a spa weekend away.
It’s about life skills and relationships.
It’s about learning to not collapse in hard times and transitions
It’s about getting clear about what’s getting in the way of your own power and sovereignty in life decisions.
It’s about intuition development.

I’m so excited to be leading this annual retreat March 12-15 in Malibu
If you’re in these states of change, this will be a great place for anchoring in and launching off.
Link in bio 🔗

10/31/2025

Next thing you know, Gramma has this sitting on the mantle.
Who tells her? 🤓

Happy Halloween, lovers 👻

Address

152 S Lasky
Beverly Hills, CA
90212

Website

http://www.sexloveyoga.com/

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