02/15/2026
Even in the middle of people caring, of people checking in, of people loving me, there is still a core part of this that no one can touch. They can sit beside me. They can listen. They can care deeply. But they cannot carry this for me.
There is no one who can help me accept that you are gone. No one who can walk that moment with me when it hits again. No one who can step in and absorb even a fraction of the truth that you are not coming back. That work is mine alone, and I did not ask for it. I would hand it off in a second if I could.
This is one of the cruelest parts of grief. The realization that love and support do not change the fact that the reckoning is solitary. I still have to wake up to this life. I still have to face the absence. I still have to learn how to live in a world where you do not exist anymore. And I hate it. I hate that this is mine to do.
If you are realizing this too, oh my friend, I am sorry. This is simply the truth of grief. Some parts cannot be shared, no matter how loved you are. And still, even in that loneliness, you are not the only one doing this kind of impossible work. Many of us are walking this same path, one day at a time, even when we hate that we have to.
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