Journey Thru Counseling

03/10/2026

What else can we add here? 🖊️💌🙌🏻

03/10/2026

DBT Skills : Distress Tolerance. Skill : STOP Skill.

03/10/2026

03/10/2026

Anger often shows up as a highly visible emotion, but it is rarely the full story.

In psychology and therapy/counselling, anger is often described as a secondary emotion as it frequently masks other feelings such as fear, sadness, hurt, or shame.

'The Anger Iceberg '( saved to photo album 'Emotion Regulation ' in our photos/media folders) is one useful tool to explore what lies beneath the surface.

Equally important is understanding what triggers anger in the first place.

This helpful infographic by shows us that triggers can be understood on different levels:

🔹 Immediate triggers: hunger, stress, poor communication, or fatigue.

🔹 Emotional & interpersonal triggers: feeling disrespected, excluded, or unappreciated.

🔹 Psychological & cognitive triggers: fear of losing control, negative self-talk, or a sense of powerlessness.

🔹 Root-level & learned causes: unresolved trauma, early learned behaviours, or unmet emotional needs.

Recognising our own triggers is one of the the steps to managing our anger in a healthier way.

By becoming curious about what sits underneath the reaction, we can begin to respond with more awareness and less reactivity.

03/08/2026

Have you ever felt stuck in a moment you couldn’t shake? Like something small set you off, but hours later, you’re spiraling, questioning everything about yourself?

That’s shame.
And it rarely shows up loud.
It creeps in quietly… and before you know it, you're deep in a loop that feels impossible to escape.

It starts with a trigger.
A look, a tone, a silence. Something small ... but it pokes at an old wound. And suddenly, you're not just reacting to what happened... you're reacting to everything it brings up.

The next move? Your mind rushes in to make meaning.
You jump to conclusions: “They’re mad at me.” “I always screw this up.” “I knew I wasn’t enough.”
These aren’t thoughts. They’re parts of you, protective, scared, trying to keep you safe.

Before you even realize it, your beliefs take over.
Not your calm, grounded Self...
But the beliefs that were shaped in survival mode. And now? You’re stuck in the story, not the truth.

So you reach for something to manage the overwhelm.
You scroll. You shut down. You overwork. You numb out.

Then comes the shame about the shame.
You feel guilty for how you reacted, regret what you said… and now you’re judging yourself for the very thing your system did to protect you.

Shame is not who you are.
It’s a part. It has a voice. It learned how to speak that way because it had to.

When we bring compassion, curiosity, and connection to that part… the spiral slows.
And eventually?
You don’t spiral—you soften.

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03/08/2026

It’s okay to have mixed feelings about the things you care about 💌

03/03/2026

03/01/2026

Manipulation in relationships rarely announces itself. It usually shows up as something that feels almost normal until you start paying close attention.

Guilt-tripping weaponizes sacrifice to make you feel bad for having needs. Gaslighting rewrites history and makes you doubt your own memory. Playing victim avoids accountability by centering the manipulator's pain instead of the harm they caused. Love bombing creates fast attachment through overwhelming affection, then drops the effort once you're hooked. And the silent treatment uses emotional absence as control.

None of these are communication. They're all ways of getting what someone wants without actually being honest about it.

Knowing what these patterns look like is the first step to not getting lost inside them.

03/01/2026

When these needs are met most of the time, the relationship feels safe.
And when it feels safe, partners can handle stress, conflict, and even hurt without the bond unraveling.

When these needs are chronically unmet, the nervous system goes into protest.
That’s where negative cycles begin.

03/01/2026

Not all tough feelings are bad.
Sometimes they’re signals.

Grief means something mattered.
Fear means stay alert.
Anger means protect your boundaries.
Aversion means something isn’t right.
Guilt means reflect.
Shame means reconnect with your worth.

Your emotions aren’t the enemy — they’re information.

Learning to understand them is part of healing.

💚 www.recoverytrauma.com