10/28/2023
We don’t talk about grief enough, even if it’s the one thing we are all guaranteed to experience.
It can feel isolating when a friend that you are close to loses someone they love.
You feel heartbroken for them but also might not even have known the person they lost.
Grief is messy, confusing, and utterly overwhelming, even if you aren’t the one that’s grieving.
Wanting to support them is so normal, and so is being clueless about what grief looks like in a friend.
Here are five ways to support a friend that’s grieving:
1️⃣ Schedule plans with firm times, but be loose about them following through; encourage them to check in, knowing that you will be available if they want to connect, but there is ZERO pressure for them to follow through if they don’t feel up for it.
2️⃣ Offer to handle any logistical things like scheduling, driving, and meals.
3️⃣ Don’t take things personally. Their world just got turned upside down. I promise, anything that is going on has nothing to do with you.
4️⃣ Talk with your therapist, friends, elders, etc., on how to best support your friend. Don’t make it their responsibility to teach you about grief. If they share something, respect their request.
5️⃣ Be patient, and remember that healing isn’t linear. There is no timeline for someone to get “over” their grief. Your friend might seem okay one day, and then distant and distraught the next. This is totally normal. Be spacious, be patient, be kind.
6️⃣ Encourage them to take care of themselves as best as possible. If you’re socializing with them, don’t plan a wild night out (unless they request it), but instead plan things that bring them back into their body - good food, yoga class, walk along the water - which helps them move into regulation, and thus, process the experience.
If you want to talk with a Licensed Mental Health professional on how to help a friend who’s grieving, reach out to today 🫶
