11/05/2025
From Marty Klein:
When someone says “I don’t want you watching p**n,” they’re proposing a solution. The question is, what problem is this proposal designed to solve?
If people just focus on the solution, and they disagree about it, the conversation is over. Instead, they need to discuss her dissatisfaction: “I want more s*x with you.” “I want different s*x with you.” “I want you to treat me differently when we’re in front of other women, like waitresses, cashiers, and my friends.” (Of course, he should also articulate any dissatisfaction, too.)
Many couples argue about p**n--but the conflict isn't really about p**n. It's typically about s*xual dissatisfaction.