Jeffrey Sumber

04/03/2020

The strength of your relationship is the greatest response to an external crisis. Here’s an exercise to do with your partner each week.

03/13/2020

Please LEAD by EXAMPLE as you LOVE in the Time of CORONA...

What an unprecedented moment we are all experiencing right now in our world! A few weeks ago the term “social distancing” held a very different connotation for many of us. Today, however, it is understood to be the very practical, physical precaution many see as our best defense against a more devastating outcome from this current health crisis. Whether you believe you are at personal risk or not of contracting the coronavirus, I feel it is essential to protect the larger community by protecting ourselves. Based on current data, many of you are correct in understanding that the mortality risk if you were to become ill is low. However, social distancing is as much about the strangers, friends and family members you might come into contact with that we must be most concerned about. There is nothing valiant in blowing off a health crisis. There is no strength in undercutting the simple steps required to protect those less powerful than you. Humility is an opportunity and this is a historical moment. I encourage us all to be humble right now and do what we can to save others from pain and suffering.

This is an opportunity for all of us to think about others. It’s a chance to truly make a difference in the world simply by instituting physical distance. What I can’t stress enough, however, is how in these times it is even more crucial that we stay connected emotionally to the people we care about. Social distance must not translate into emotional distance. Reach out to the people in your lives and check in on them. Tell people you are thinking about them, that they matter to you. Stay home, yes. Work, play, breathe…from home. Issac Newton quarantined himself when Cambridge University closed in 1665 because of the PLAGUE. It was the most creative, productive time of his life. I suppose you can catch up on Netflix, but what else could you do? What have you been complaining about not having enough time to do? Do it! Get creative. Journal. Paint. Discover new music.

I know many of you are leaders at work, at home and in your communities. This is a test of your leadership. I believe there is a significant difference between panic and preparation; a major chasm between exaggerating a “potential threat” and making decisions to mitigate the possibility of an even greater crisis. Choosing to be a bit more cautious today may very well be the reason we do not need to stay physically distant in the near tomorrow…Enjoy a staycation, plan your garden, take walks, read a book…and support our healthcare system by not inserting yourself into it unnecessarily. Reach out to others and be sure to stay emotionally connected!

Staying engaged in your emotional, relational process during these difficult times is essential for your overall well-being and also supports your ability to be strong and supportive for your friends, co-workers and family members.

Let us defy the odds together by setting a higher bar for our own integrity.

To our collective health and well-being,

Jeffrey

12/28/2019

Reconsider the same old resolutions and make it a REVOLUTION for 2020! I’m sure you’re aware that a disturbing percentage of our New Year’s resolutions are trashed within 2 months. In my experience, this is largely due to a lack of accountability and community.

As some of you already know, I turned 49 a month ago and I have created a MASSIVE challenge for myself in the time leading up to turning 50.

I call it fifty2fifty.

In the 52 weeks before I hit 50, an age that once just seemed like FOREVER away, I will do whatever it takes to be a BETTER version of ME than I have been in memory.

I already released 90lbs in the past couple of years through tracking, accountability and more mindful movement and yet, I’m still softer than I want to be. I want to be FIT. I want to be VIBRANTLY HEALTHY. I want to be STRONG! So, now I dig deeper and push harder to sweat more and eliminate the pudgy tire around my middle. I will do my first Triathlon in Minneapolis this July!

I already have a great relationship with my partner, Kari, and yet I want it to be INCREDIBLE. I will continue to challenge myself to show up with kindness, compassion and the active desire to move toward her needs.

My relationships with friends and family are overall, good. I can do better. Less sarcasm and MORE loving presence. Less passive aggressive, MORE active, vulnerable connection. I have already begun to reach out to the people who have most impacted me in my life and communicate the gifts they have given me in my first 50 years on the planet. This has already been profoundly moving (out of my comfort zone) and I know will continue to challenge and inspire growth.

I began in 2019 to study the art of story-telling as an avenue for sharing our wisdom and teaching others what insights we have to offer. For my 49th birthday, I kicked off a year of public speaking at a Chicago resort! I intend to speak to any group that is interested in my personal journey and for anyone who feels I might be able to inspire a different way of embracing life’s challenges. I’m incredibly excited to see where that leads.

The list of focus areas goes on for me, from becoming more financially independent ( we are currently studying options trading ) to becoming less cluttered ( I have started to reduce my STUFF, making regular donations of FAT clothes ( I have held onto numerous clothing sizes my whole adult life due to fluctuations in weight but this is now changing- I am burning my boats ) and on and on.

So aside from simple accountability, I am sharing this with you because I’m inviting YOU to join me on the journey. It doesn’t matter if you’re 25 or 75 years old. What would your life be like if you took 52 weeks to transform just ONE area, just ONE small thing in your life? What would need to make that happen? I know that I can’t fully accomplish my goals without the love, support and accountability of my friends and family. I need you. In return, I’d like to help you feel better about where you are in your life.

If sharing the road together appeals to you, please let me know. I have created a fifty2fifty Facebook group and I’d like to create a community of like-minded souls to support one another as we make a REVOLUTION in our lives, together! I hope to post positive accomplishments, inspirations and aspirations as well as reach out to one another when we are struggling, feeling negative or experience setbacks. I’d even like to host virtual monthly meetings where we check in on the path.

I believe strongly that when we RISE up to be the best versions of ourselves, we LIFT up those around us and challenge them to rise as well. Let’s celebrate the new decade with a fifty-two week kick-off. Think what you can accomplish in 52 weeks. I wrote and published my first book in 5 months. I lost 87lbs in 53 weeks. I had help. Let’s help each other now with a fifty2YOU!

Please send me a note on Messenger if you’d like to join me on this journey and be a part of the fifty2fifty experience.

Blessings and love,

Jeffrey

08/27/2019

Psychotherapist, author, and relationship consultant Jeffrey Sumber talks about taking responsibility for your happiness with WGN Radio's Karen Conti! They discuss selecting the right person, how to deal with that special someone within the relationship what it truly takes to achieve happiness toget...

06/14/2019

Such a good book.

06/12/2019

It is time to USE our fear, not be USED by it. This is an ongoing wrestling match for me and I believe so many of us struggle with it in our relationships, our journey to self fulfillment and deep growth (and even our spiritual paths). So, perhaps, today, we can all quietly, unceremoniously, edge FEAR to the background and elevate our path to deep connection and excellence!!!

12/21/2018

Are you willing to surrender to love? Are you in the game or being gamed? Offer yourself the opportunity to CHOOSE your path, your relationship WITH and your chance to SHINE.

11/20/2018

Will you BE PRESENT or BUY PRESENTS?

11/20/2018

How many do you need? What does this time in your life support as far as your growth and development? When it is time to “shop” for others, imagine asking these same questions and consider gifts that place ourselves within the “present.” Give mindfully and as if an aspect of your heart actually comes with it....!

11/19/2018

11/11/2018