Life Transitions Counseling,PLLC

Life Transitions Counseling,PLLC Debra Alper is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker in private practice in Chicago specializing in relational therapy and divorce recovery.

Life Transitions Counseling offers supportive insight oriented therapy for individuals and couples navigating complex relationships
• Relationship trauma & Emotional Abuse
• Self Esteem and disconnect issues
• Divorce and divorce recovery. She has worked extensively since 1999 with individual clients striving to experience deeper, more meaningful relationships, couples in the midst of marital crisis around infidelity and unhappy, lonely relationships, and clients struggling to get through the emotional, and life changing hurdles of pre and post-divorce. Debra Alper received her undergraduate degree from the University of Massachusetts, Amherst, and her Masters in Social Work from Loyola University, Chicago. She has received specialized training in Gottman Marital Therapy, Harville Hendrix Imago Therapy, and she participated in a yearlong weekly seminar from the University of Chicago on Psychodynamic Theory. Debra has volunteered with various literacy organizations around Chicago, most recently working with Sit Stay Read, combining her passion for reading, children and dogs. Debra resides in Chicago living happily 3 blocks away from her only daughter, and sharing her home with her beloved rescue Maltese Lilly. When Debra is not working, or dog walking, you can find her at her favorite yoga class, taking a long walk on the lakefront, traveling (preferably in Italy) or cooking.

At some point you begin to feel it.The relationship is changing. The warmth isn’t as certain as it once was.And yet many...
03/16/2026

At some point you begin to feel it.

The relationship is changing. The warmth isn’t as certain as it once was.

And yet many people don’t leave in that moment. Instead, they often try harder. They try to get back to the connection they remember from the beginning.

This is one of the earliest moments where attachment can quietly begin to pull someone back toward the relationship.

Sometimes the hardest relationships to leave aren’t the ones where love was never there.They’re the ones where the conne...
03/13/2026

Sometimes the hardest relationships to leave aren’t the ones where love was never there.

They’re the ones where the connection felt powerful in the beginning, and you keep hoping that version will come back.

These are some of the patterns people often describe when a relationship starts to feel addictive.

Sometimes people stay in relationships not because they feel loved, but because they remember how the love felt in the b...
03/09/2026

Sometimes people stay in relationships not because they feel loved, but because they remember how the love felt in the beginning.

When affection becomes unpredictable, people often start trying harder instead of asking why it changed.

Affection should never feel like something you have to earn back.

Save this if you want to come back to it.

One of the things that becomes clear after years of listening to people talk about their relationships is how often conf...
03/04/2026

One of the things that becomes clear after years of listening to people talk about their relationships is how often confusion creeps in quietly.

Healthy relationships usually have a certain steadiness to them. You don’t spend a lot of time trying to figure out what someone meant, whether they’ll follow through, or why the story suddenly changed.

Respect tends to show up in behavior.
Care shows up in consistency.
And when someone apologizes, you eventually see change.

When those things are missing, people often start working much harder just to keep the relationship feeling stable.

It’s subtle, but it matters.

Which of these do you think is most important for a relationship to feel emotionally safe?

Have you ever been in a relationship where the connection felt amazing…and then suddenly distant?One day you feel close....
03/02/2026

Have you ever been in a relationship where the connection felt amazing…
and then suddenly distant?

One day you feel close.
The next day something shifts.
You can’t quite explain it, but you feel it.

You start wondering what you did.
You try a little harder.
You become a little more careful.

And when the warmth comes back, you feel relieved.

That relief feels so good.

There’s actually a reason for that.

When affection is unpredictable -warm, then distant, then warm again, it can pull us in even more deeply. It works a little like a slot machine. You don’t win every time. But when you do, the reward feels powerful.

That pattern is called intermittent reinforcement.

It doesn’t mean you’re weak.
It means your nervous system is wired for connection.

If this feels familiar, please know you’re not alone and there’s nothing wrong with you.

Understanding the pattern is the first step toward stepping out of it.

This is the quiet tension many women live in long before anyone else knows something is wrong.Divorce is not just a lega...
02/28/2026

This is the quiet tension many women live in long before anyone else knows something is wrong.

Divorce is not just a legal decision. It disrupts identity, stability, family dynamics, and your sense of self.

You can be strong and still feel completely destabilized.

This spring I am holding space for a small group of women navigating divorce- before, during, or after.

Divorce, Relationships and Rebuilding You begins March 23.

If you or someone you know may benefit, email me directly at
debra@lifetransitionschicago.com

After talking about blame shifting this week, I keep coming back to something simple.Healthy connection might not always...
02/25/2026

After talking about blame shifting this week, I keep coming back to something simple.

Healthy connection might not always be easy but it feels steady.

You don’t feel rushed to fix it.
You don’t feel pressured to prove yourself.
You don’t feel like you’re constantly defending your memory.

Confusion, on the other hand, often comes with urgency.
A need to explain.
A need to repair something you didn’t break.

Clarity feels calm.

If you’ve been living in urgency instead of calm, it’s worth paying attention to that.

You can look composed and still feel completely undone inside.Divorce is destabilizing in ways people rarely talk about....
02/23/2026

You can look composed and still feel completely undone inside.

Divorce is destabilizing in ways people rarely talk about. You still show up. You still function. You still parent. You still make decisions.

And quietly, you wonder who you are now.

Rebuilding isn’t loud. It’s layered. It takes courage and steadiness.

This spring I’m holding space for a small, curated group of women who are before, during, or after divorce and navigating exactly that.

Divorce, Relationships and Rebuilding You.

If this resonates, feel free to reach out.

Confusion in a relationship usually isn’t random.It builds slowly.Blame shifting is one of the ways it happens.The story...
02/20/2026

Confusion in a relationship usually isn’t random.

It builds slowly.

Blame shifting is one of the ways it happens.

The story changes.
Responsibility moves.
And before you realize it, you’re apologizing for things that aren’t yours.

You start questioning your memory.
Your tone.
Your reactions.

That isn’t healthy communication.
That’s a pattern.

I’m opening a new group this spring called Divorce, Relationships & Rebuilding You.If you are somewhere between staying ...
02/16/2026

I’m opening a new group this spring called Divorce, Relationships & Rebuilding You.

If you are somewhere between staying and leaving, in the middle of a divorce, or legally finished but quietly asking yourself who you are now, this may be for you.

Divorce is rarely just legal. It touches identity, confidence, parenting, finances, friendships, and the way you experience yourself in relationships.

Seven years ago, I went through my own divorce. In my work as a relational therapist, I sit with women navigating this transition every day. What I know is this: you do not simply end a marriage. You dismantle a version of your life and then have to build something new.

This is not an open support circle. It is a guided eight week intensive that combines structured teaching with confidential discussion in a curated group of eight women.

We will explore attachment styles, long standing relationship patterns, building a strong divorce team, supporting children through transition, dating thoughtfully when ready, and learning how to be alone without feeling lonely.

The group begins Monday, March 23, 2026 at 7 PM and meets for eight 75 minute live Zoom sessions.

The investment for the full eight week program is 1400 dollars.

Participation is by application so I can intentionally create a balanced and cohesive group of women at different stages of the process who can genuinely support one another.

To request an application, email me directly at debra@lifetransitionschicago.com.

02/15/2026

Address

Telehealth
Chicago, IL
60610

Opening Hours

Tuesday 9am - 5pm
Wednesday 1pm - 7pm
Thursday 12pm - 7pm
Saturday 9am - 1pm

Telephone

+17739317220

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Our Story

Debra Alper is a Licensed Clinical Social Worker in private practice in Chicago specializing in relational therapy and divorce recovery. She has worked extensively since 1999 with individual clients striving to experience deeper, more meaningful relationships, couples in the midst of marital crisis around infidelity and unhappy, lonely relationships, and clients struggling to get through the emotional, and life changing hurdles of pre and post-divorce. Debra Alper received her undergraduate degree from the University of Massachusetts, Amherst, and her Masters in Social Work from Loyola University, Chicago. She has received specialized training in Gottman Marital Therapy, Harville Hendrix Imago Therapy, and she participated in a yearlong weekly seminar from the University of Chicago on Psychodynamic Theory. Debra has volunteered with various literacy organizations around Chicago, most recently working with Sit Stay Read, combining her passion for reading, children and dogs. Debra resides in Chicago living happily 3 blocks away from her only daughter, and sharing her home with her beloved rescue Maltese Lilly. When Debra is not working, or dog walking, you can find her at her favorite yoga class, taking a long walk on the lakefront, traveling (preferably in Italy) or cooking.