09/27/2025
Hold on to your Cheetos folks!!
IMELDA: The Hot Mess With a Track
Well folks, IMELDA has done something most of us canโt even do after three cups of coffeeโsheโs managed to find a track before she even exists. Thatโs right, the storm that isnโt quite a storm yet already has a plan, and the National Hurricane Center is basically waving their arms like, โHey yโall, please pay attention before she shows up at your door.โ
Now, if IMELDA does get her act together, she might spin herself into a Cat 1 hurricane. Donโt panic yetโitโs like when your neighborโs chihuahua puts on a spiked collar. Looks scary, still ankle-height. But then sheโll likely calm down into a tropical storm before landfall, which is Mother Natureโs version of showing up hungover to brunch.
Either way, the party favors remain the same: rain that dumps buckets, wind that rearranges your lawn furniture into modern art, and flash flooding that makes you wish you invested in a canoe. So yeah, strength doesnโt matter muchโthe impacts will still slap.
Until she actually decides who she wants to be, keep your eyes peeled and your essentials stocked. And by essentials, I mean the holy trinity: Cheetos, beer, and duct tape. Stay tuned.