Janice Vitale, LCSW - Vitale Counseling

08/14/2024

Love this!

02/27/2023

What I learned from a six-year-old girl about being assertive and powerful. Heads up on language. I use a couple swear words. :)

Photo description: Young girl with braided pigtails, with the blue sky and clouds behind her, looking powerful, dressed as a superhero, standing in a power pose with her hands on her hips, wearing a purple mask that goes around her eyes, and a red cape blowing in the wind behind her. My brother, sis...

10/03/2022

10/01/2022

06/15/2022

I love this TedTalk. It's all about not hiding our true selves with others. I found the talk to be very inspiring. "A closet is no place for a person to live". The world needs the authentic you!

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kSR4xuU07sc

04/16/2022

"Understand that therapy is an opportunity to grow as a human, not just a method to do away with the symptoms."

Therapy isn't a spectator sport; it really isn’t. Sometimes when people start therapy for the first time, they think that their therapist will have all the answers or that the therapist is the boss and will tell them what to do. I will let you in on a little trade secret; we don’t have all the a...

01/28/2022

Please stay.

(PD: image of lavender hoodie with these words on the front: “Keep breathing. Your life is worth living. You are needed. Please stay.”)

12/28/2021

“Tell your story.
Shout it. Write it.
Whisper it if you have to.
But tell it.
Some won't understand it.
Some will outright reject it.
But many will
thank you for it.
And then the most
magical thing will happen.
One by one, voices will start
whispering, 'Me, too.'
And your tribe will gather.
And you will never
feel alone again.”
L.R. Knost

Olga Grigoreva-Klimova - The Wind, 2019

12/01/2021

This is wonderful advice about being with people who are grieving during the holidays.

Holiday host etiquette: If you’re inviting someone to your home and they’re grieving, be sure you’re inviting their grief to attend, too. It will be there, anyway.

Don’t invite someone with the goal of cheering them up for the holidays. Don’t expect them to put on a happy face in your home. Don’t demand they fake it til they make it or do something they don’t want to do, either.

Invite them with the loving intention of offering cheer and companionship and unconditional care during the holidays. To do this, you will need to honor and be responsive to their needs and emotions.

You can do this by privately acknowledging their grief when you make the invitation:

“I know this season is extra hard and your heart is hurting. You and your grief are welcome in our home. Come as you are, we’d be honored to have you with us.”

It’s also incredibly loving to honor the reality that it’s often hard for grieving folks to know what they will want, need, be up for, or able to tolerate at the holidays.

Giving them an invite without the need for commitment and permission to change their mind is extra loving:

“You don’t have to decide right now. If it feels good to be with us, we will have plenty of food and love for you-just show up! I’ll check in again the day before to see if you’re feeling up to coming over and if there’s anything you’d like me to know about how we can support you.”

Your grieving friends and fam need attentive care and responsiveness at the holidays, not plans to keep them busy, distracted, and happy.

If they’re laughing, laugh with them.

If they’re weeping, ask if they’d like your company or your help finding a quiet place to snuggle up alone for awhile.

If they’re laughing while weeping, and this is more common than you’d think, stay with them - this is a precious moment of the human experience that is truly sacred.

We don’t need to protect ourselves or each other from grief at the holidays. In fact, the more we embrace grief as an honored holiday guest, the more healthy, happy, and whole our holidays will be. 🙏

In solidarity,
Sarah Nannen