01/15/2026
A few people have asked me what lessons I’ve learned through this devastating season of my life.
I guess it’s good news that I can say I’ve actually learned a lot (SOMETHING good has to come from all of this...right??).
I’ve learned that, no matter how well you think you know someone, and no matter how many years you’ve known them, they can still surprise you.
I’ve learned that unhealed trauma can be stronger than any level of connection, love, or joy.
I’ve learned that maturity and emotional intelligence are NOT the same thing, and that someone who is incredibly mature can still lack the necessary tools to understand, feel, express, and talk about their emotions.
I’ve learned that being best friends is not enough to sustain a long-term relationship.
I’ve learned that you can build an entire life with someone only to find out that you have completely different views of what commitment looks like in a relationship.
I’ve learned that there were really important questions that I needed to ask early on and never did: What are your tendencies when faced with discomfort in a relationship? What would it take for you to leave a marriage? What are you willing to do to fight for the relationship when things get hard?
I’m sure there will be more lessons to come as I move through the grief, pain, shock, anger, and disappointment of this season of my life.
I never share these things to cast blame or to speak poorly about others - I played a role in this as well.
But I’m never NOT going to share things that I believe will help other people heal, build self awareness, and strengthen their own relationships.
If sharing my experiences helps even one person avoid this pain, then it’s worth it.
Sending you all big, big hugs.🖤
