Blue Skies Gentle Parenting

12/19/2025

12/15/2025

Human milk is not static. It responds to the environment, including the season!!! 😮

A 2024 study published in eBioMedicine found that the types and amounts of human milk oligosaccharides change depending on the time of year (Matharu et al., 2024). HMOs are complex sugars in breast milk that do not feed the baby directly. Instead, they nourish beneficial gut bacteria and play a key role in shaping immune development 🦠🛡️

The researchers observed that during colder months, when respiratory and gastrointestinal infections are MORE prevalent, specific HMOs were present in different concentrations and patterns. These seasonal changes in milk composition were associated with measurable differences in the infant gut microbiota… meaning the bacteria living in the baby’s intestines shifted alongside the milk they received 🧬🫨

SOOOO why does this matter to us?

HMOs *promote* the growth of protective bacteria while helping block pathogens from attaching to the gut lining. Seasonal adjustments in HMOs may help infants better adapt to seasonal infection, particularly during winter when illness risk is higher ❄️🤍

In simple terms: your breast milk is season aware. It adjusts to help protect your baby when winter bugs are circulating and supports gut and immune health in ways that CANNOT be replicated by formula.

12/15/2025

https://www.facebook.com/share/1AWBbJArjR/

Talking to Children about Difficult Things in the News

12/06/2025

Listen to someone and be the reason they have to be thankful for today!

12/06/2025

Children often save their most intense emotions for their mothers because they see her as the ultimate “safe base” to release stress and be their unfiltered self, trusting her co-regulation (calming presence) to soothe their nervous system after holding it together elsewhere. Their nervous system literally attunes to the mother’s, and showing big emotions is a sign of deep trust, not defiance, indicating they feel secure enough to “fall apart”.

▶️Why this happens (The Science):
📑Safety & Trust: A child’s nervous system recognizes the mother (or primary caregiver) as the person they can fully trust to handle their big feelings without judgment or threat, allowing them to drop their guard.
📑Co-regulation: Mothers help calm a child’s distressed nervous system through mirroring (heartbeat, breath) and soothing. This teaches the child self-regulation.
📑Mirroring the Nervous System: A child’s internal state (heart rate, stress hormones) mirrors the parent’s. A mother’s calm presence is medicine; her anxiety can become the child’s “normal”.
📑The “Safe Field Effect”: When a child sees their mother, their brain gets a signal they’re safe to release pent-up emotions from school or other situations.

▶️What it looks like
📑“Saving the Worst for Last”: They might behave perfectly at school but have meltdowns at home because the tension has to go somewhere.
📑Not Misbehavior, but Release: The tantrum isn’t defiance; it’s the child letting go of stress in the one place they feel secure enough to do so.

▶️How to respond
📑Regulate Yourself First: Your calm is their medicine. Take deep breaths to signal safety.
📑Validate & Connect: Say, “You held a lot in today. It’s okay to let it out now”.
📑Offer Presence, Not Logic: Their logical brain is offline. Offer connection, gentle touch, and calm, not lectures.

Studies also show that when children don’t have this secure attachment to lean on, it negatively rewires the child’s brain.
Read more here: https://www.news-medical.net/news/20250612/Unpredictable-caregiving-rewires-the-braine28099s-threat-response.aspx

12/02/2025

12/02/2025

12/02/2025

i don’t think people realize how toddlers actually process what we say.

when we tell them,
“don’t climb”
their brain grabs the word climb not the “don’t.”

when we say,
“don’t scream,”
the word they hold onto is scream.

when we say,
“stop running,”
the part that sticks is run.

toddlers latch onto the last word
the action word
because their brains aren’t developed enough yet to flip a negative into the opposite behavior.
they’re not ignoring us.. they literally can’t process it the way we think they do.

so instead of:
“get off the table,”
say:
“feet on the floor.”

instead of:
“don’t scream,”
say:
“use your inside voice,”
and then show them what that sounds like.

instead of:
“stop running,”
say:
“walk please.”

toddlers learn best from clarity, modeling, and direction
not from the word “no.”

when we change how we speak,
we change how well they understand..
and suddenly they’re not “misbehaving”
they’re just finally hearing what we actually meant.

12/02/2025

Slow down tonight.

They won’t remember the mess, but they’ll remember you being there.

12/02/2025

12/02/2025

Validating our kids’ feelings doesn’t make them weaker — it helps them trust themselves. 💛