04/04/2026
Would you like a true ghost story? Well you will get one like it or not. read or scroll on, it will be long.
My cousin passed away in 2024 in southern California. He was a veteran of Viet Nam, wounded in the Tet offensive. Ron came home with scars that never faded. 11 years older than myself, we never had a close relationship over our lifetime. His mother and mine, sisters and best friends, were the only knowledge we really had of each other, bits passed along in conversations.
In the last few years of our mother's lives, I finally came to know my cousin. No longer able to travel long distances they were 94 and 96 respectfully, We would call each other so the "girls" could chat.
When they were done, Ron and I would carry on and talk long hours. He was an original Viet Nam vet. Tough and gritty, with a hella sense of humor. An old biker dude, who loved busting knuckles and racing. We finally had the time to get to know each other. I was always amazed at the things we had in common. We both loved an eclectic style of music blending old soul, country, rock, and a few of the newer artists together, we both enjoyed cars, racing, antiques, (including ourselves in this category) humor, and an undefined belief in a power greater than ourselves. DNA comes through in odd ways sometimes.
When my cousin passed away in 2024 he had no other blood family but our two aunts who live in Chicago and a few of us cousins. The aunts, as next of kin, asked me if I could take over and deal with the estate, and I reluctantly agreed. My cousin was laid to rest in Bakersfield National Cemetery as we had no idea what he would have wished. He left no directions on the matter. I looked at his wife's death cert, to see where she had been laid to rest, with the hopes that I could put them together somewhere, but, I found only that her cremations had been sent to his home address. I had not found her remains and assumed he had scattered her ashes somewhere in the Mojave desert.
Months passed. I am deep into cleaning and getting my cousin's home ready to sell. Friends, Heather and Paul, came over to help haul items to the thrift store one Sunday. They had never been to my cousin's home, and loved the wild quiet of the high desert. Paul asked if he could poke around in the garage... I said of course. We walked out and I opened the garage for him. He walked in, where I had walked 100 times already, leaned over and picked something up off the floor. He handed it to me and said "This is yours". I looked at it and I said "Nope! Wow, how neat! No it's not mine." It was a Christian cross from a necklace. How I had never seen it I have no idea, but Paul found it. I left him to it. There was a ton of stuff in the garage, my cousin had been an auto mechanic all his life, and I will just let you imagine a two car garage filled to the brim with auto mechanic things, a Mustang, a stereo system to die for, several stacking tool chests, filled with tools and clutter. A true "man cave". I left Paul to poke around and discover what his heart desired and I went back in the house to help Heather make a thrift store pile.
Paul came in the house a little while later, he had a bag of w**d. It was so old there was a layer of dust on the bottom where it had crumbled to nothingness. We laughed, yup that was my cousin. Paul went out and came back again with another bag of w**d. Again we laughed. Paul said he was enjoying poking around in the garage, it reminded him of his dad's garage... I said with the w**d as well? he said well...... lol. Paul came in a third time with a postal box in this hands, he asked, "who is Kelly?" I said what? thinking he had found some papers or something. I said Kelly was Ron's wife. She passed away in 2012. Paul, with all seriousness, said, "I found her". I said you couldn't have found her, she passed away in 2012... I didn't understand what he was saying. He thrust the box out to me, he repeated "I.. found.. her."... I took the box, and there inside, was another box, wrapped in white paper, and on the end of the box, was Kelly's name, and the address of the crematorium. It was Kelly's cremations. I sat down hard. Kelly. Ron's beloved wife. There were tears, relief, joy, blessings. Paul had indeed found Kelly. She had been in the one place that Ron loved. In the garage, with his tools and car that he loved to work on. Somewhere where he could turn on the music, sit in the car they loved and dream.
The next day I called the cemetery, asked them what I needed to do to get these two together. They told me the steps and basically I had to get the burial permit amended by the Health Department to have the Bakersfield Cemetery listed as the burial place and then I would be allowed to transport her to them. So, I went to the health department and got the amendment filled out and called the cemetery said when can I bring her to you? and they said well, do you want a service? I said no, its only me here, and I just want them together. Well, you can bring her now if you want, I am here till 5.
I went to my cousin's home and got Kelly. I had to apologize that her last ride wouldn't be their Mustang, but the Honda CR-V would have to do. Let me stop here. I have a problem with my phone, I am not always very techie, and sometimes when I get in my car the phone links to the car and what ever pod cast was playing pops on. I don't know how to control it, I never listen to music via my phone, I have a CD player for music, BUT, When I turned on the car and the phone linked to the car, suddenly Lynnard Skinner popped on with FREEBIRD! I know this was Ron's favorite music, he had all Lynnard's CD's. MAN, all the way to the cemetery Kelly and I rocked out to Lynnard. Once there, I went inside and one of the things I was asked to do was fill out the headstone information. Kelly's name, birth info death info, easy peasy I had the death certificate and I am a genealogist. Then less easy, what else to put down. I wrote, Beloved Wife, Mother, and Nana. She had a child before she married my cousin, and a couple of grandkids, I know she adored the kids, because the walls were full of photos of the kids. Then more space. What else could I write? or was that enough. I thought about the time Ron and Kelly had been apart. The sorrow of losing someone so beloved and waiting from 12 years to be together again. I put down "Reunited at last" 12 years was long enough. I thanked the people at the Cemetery for making it so easy. And then I left. I got in my car, and started it up. The phone linked to the car again. I was waiting for Lynnard to pop onto the speakers so I could rock all the way home. but NOOOOO
It was Etta James "At last".
All the way home, I listened to Etta James love songs.
Paul and Heather came back a few days later and we were sitting there discussing the events, totally blown away by how things had worked out. I showed Paul that I had put the cross on a chain and was wearing it. He thought it was really cool. He said "What happened to the other cross?" What ?? He said there was a cross on the wall over there, I remember seeing it when I first came in.... I said on THAT wall??? he said ya, what happened to that one? I said Paul, I took that home months ago. We were all shook. A power greater than ourselves had guided our hands to put these two together. AT LAST!
