Vanessa Holistic Therapist

06/13/2023

08/16/2022

https://drarielleschwartz.com/the-fawn-response-in-complex-ptsd-dr-arielle-schwartz/ #.YvwHoBYpAWN

The fawn response involves people-pleasing or disconnecting from emotions, sensations, and needs. This occurs because they withhold feelings..

07/21/2022

ℹ️🌿 THE DIFFICULT ROAD TO INTIMACY: LIVING WITH COMPLEX POST-TRAUMATIC STRESS DISORDER | BY SHIRLEY DAVIS

***Trigger Warning ***The following material has been reported to be highly triggering to some.

Living with complex post-traumatic stress disorder (CPTSD) is very challenging. It affects every aspect of the lives of those who suffer under its symptoms. In this article, we are going to examine together with a brief synopsis of CPTSD and how this disorder creates difficulty in forming and maintaining intimate relationships.

Read full article:
https://cptsdfoundation.org/2019/04/26/the-difficult-road-to-intimacy-living-with-complex-post-traumatic-stress-disorder/

Image : Poppy Leigh Social Media

04/12/2022

The impact of psychological maltreatment can be equal that of to s*xual or physical abuse.

ℹ️🌿 LIVING WITH C-PTSD FOLLOWING AN ABUSIVE RELATIONSHIP |

Due to the insidious nature of psychological maltreatment, children and adults alike often question their historical experience throughout life. They might attribute struggles with psychological suffering and social or vocational functioning to personal weakness, failure, or personality flaws, rather than understanding themselves through a lens of complex trauma

Read full article:
https://www.complextrauma.org/complex-trauma/death-by-a-thousand-cuts/

02/18/2022

When we embody our Erotic selves, we tune into the worlds around us and within us.
We listen a little closer.
We touch a little softer.
We savor and linger.
We observe and embody.

When we invite Eroticism into our individual lives, particularly by engaging in our five senses, we give ourselves permission to remember a fundamental yet oft forgotten truth: the essential beauty of the world is available to us, always, even in the darkest of times. And when we invite Eroticism into our relationship, that container of permission expands around the couple, holding us together by a shared sense of wonder that both grounds and excites us.

My blog on the topic walks you through each of the five senses with practices and exercises to spark a sensory experience in your relationships or on your own. Follow the link below to learn more, and please share your stories below.

I'm curious: which sense appeals the most to you? Which practices excite and ignite you?

https://bit.ly/3Jj1srf

02/07/2022

Watch Encanto, especially if you identify with inter generational trauma ❤️

02/05/2022

https://khironclinics.com/blog/invalidation/?fbclid=IwAR3GUb-N6jpVgoAggeZthGOFscVdqUq3OCbtWvUoWBreFRunhE7yB1Krltk

ℹ️🌿 THE NEED FOR VALIDATION AND THE CONSEQUENCES OF INVALIDATION |

Validation: The recognition of a person’s thoughts, feelings, emotions, and behaviours as valid and understandable.[1]

Invalidation, then, is the rejection or dismissal of a person’s thoughts, feelings, emotions, and behaviours as being valid and understandable.

Invalidation can cause significant damage or upset to a person’s psychological health and well-being. When a person feels invalidated, it creates the belief that their subjective emotional experiences are unreasonable, unacceptable, or insignificant. The effects of invalidation can impact anyone, regardless of age, s*x, or culture, but children are the most susceptible the negative impact of invalidation, as their awareness and understanding of the world are still in development just like their brain and nervous system. The invalidated child is likely to develop pervasive feelings of insecurity and later difficulties in healthy emotional expression.

In both children and adults, invalidation can be traumatic. It jeopardises one’s sense of existence and self-worth, leading to feelings of anger, shame, guilt, and worthlessness. Such feelings can negatively impact an individual’s day to day functioning, and can lead to psychological health conditions like depression, anxiety, post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD) and Borderline Personality Disorder (BPD).

Invalidation can cause an existential wound that goes so deep that can be perceived as threatening once right to exist. This can scar and stay with a person throughout their lives if not addressed and healed through adequate psychotherapy, psycho-education and effective tools for self-management and self-validation and of course healthy relational validation.

Read full article:
https://khironclinics.com/blog/invalidation/

01/12/2022

ℹ️🌿FIGHT, FLIGHT, FREEZE, FAWN: EXAMINING THE 4 TRAUMA RESPONSES

When there's a situation the body deems to be unsafe, the limbic system—the part of your brain responsible for memory, emotions, and survival—acts as a base of operations. It automatically jumps into action with largely instinctive protective measures to safeguard you.

But what happens when there isn't any danger around, and you still find yourself hypervigilant and activated, as if you're unable to return to a baseline of relative security? Trauma may be the invisible factor stimulating those overwhelmingly intense feelings—and causing an overreliance on survival instincts, sometimes referred to as a trauma response.

Read full article:
https://www.mindbodygreen.com/articles/fight-flight-freeze-fawn-trauma-responses

12/17/2021

Changed behavior is a true apology.
You are an empowered choice maker!

I post about relationships all the time and here are some of the most common questions I get:

- “what do you do if a person doesn’t want to heal or do the work?”

- “What about narcissists, can they change?”

- “How do I get my partner to see x”

- “How can I not end up with a narcissist?”

There is so, so much focus on narcissism and what are partners will or will not do.

Here is the thing: your partners behavior is feedback. Feedback on their emotional wellness. Feedback on their values. Feedback on how they feel about themselves (which impacts every relationship we have.)

With feedback, YOU are empowered with choice.

Your partner isn’t following through with their words. They apologize + don’t change their actions. Now, you get to decide if this person continues to have a space in your life.

People reveal themselves in their patterns. When we observe actions (not words) we no longer feel like someone can trick us, take advantage of us, or violate us. We know what to expect.

Because patterns become behavior + behavior becomes character