03/29/2019
When reflecting on Chakrapani I often imagine him at his desk, headset on, eyes closed, rocking gently from side to side, totally absorbed in the reading at hand. Maybe he would notice me as I left some tea or hot water, but typically he wouldn't engage. He was in another world which all of us around him understood and respected.
When it came to his work, he couldn't be rushed or interfered with - he always treated it with reverence. He was up every day by 6:30, 7 a.m. latest, except for his day off on Sunday. His routine was regimented, ensuring that he had plenty of time for his puja, reciting his mantras, and leisurely reviewing his charts for the day. He was very disciplined, only having abandoned his brisk, early morning walk during the last year when his health began to falter, and his equilibrium affected his balance walking long-distance. For the many decades preceding, he would don his furry red knit cap (a relic from the Muktananda days), pull it low down on his brow, zip his jacket high and enter into the crisp morning air for his daily walk. This was his routine over the years. Basically, everything Chakrapani did was to ensure that he was fit, alert and relaxed, able to enter into a meditative, receptive state when he began his readings of the day.
Although Chakrapani's office was out of earshot, periodically the relative quiet would be interrupted by his full-throated laughter which drifted through our garden to the house where I would typically be moving about, and where his assistant's office was. Chakrapani laughed a lot as you know. It was infectious, maybe because of the simplicity of the joy that prompted it - but you found yourself smiling on hearing him, appreciating his pleasure in talking with the person who was with him. He was such a joyful person; he loved his clients and he loved his work!
Chakrapani's needs were simple and he appreciated all the ways his life was blessed. He loved his morning commute out through the side door 30 paces to his office in the back. From there, he loved looking out into the garden, enjoying the play of light through the trees, the birds chirping and our two cats wandering in and out at will. Our staff, energetic and hip, brought youthful vitality and a fresh outlook to our many conversations regarding the issues of the day, and they treated him with deference and affection. For my part, Iike Chakrapani, I delighted in the ease with which our home and work blended, and I enjoyed nothing more than to curl up in the chair across from him - sometimes for just five minutes between clients, or when a break in his schedule would come. We would idly chat about whatever struck our fancy. It was sublimely simple and so comfortable, and these quiet moments brought us both a sense of peace and contentment.
Chakrapani was a man of irrefutable good cheer, no matter the circumstances. He counselled many people through perilous times, but nothing brought him down - not even in his personal affairs. He was steadfast, utterly unflappable. For him, all was part of the divine play; he was never morbid nor downbeat.
One manner of laughing (there were different kinds) was more of a quiet, knowing laugh where he was signaling you that he got it, that he understood. He might chuckle as he said, "Yes, this is the situation," meaning - yes, there is this challenge, or this restriction - can you accept it? On delivering his observations followed by that question, you felt his kindness, you felt his compassion - you knew he understood and somehow that did help you accept a bitter pill when one came - whatever it might be. There was a unique bond between the two of you because this was a man who had an intimate understanding of you - your struggles, your foibles, your soft spots, your secret fears or ambitions...and he cared! He utterly cared and so wished you well! He knew the worst as well as the best, and possibly he knew things you had not shared with anyone else. Most certainly, he understood you from the unique perspective of your spiritual growth, your worldly issues being but one facet of how he saw you.
He viewed you through the lens of astrology which, obviously, is a different perspective from how the world at large sees you, and his insights from that perspective were penetrating and wide-reaching. It all started with the horoscope. For him, the chart created an image of a living, breathing soul - it revealed everything. You might be surprised to learn that he did not typically remember you as a physical presence with certain features and so forth, but rather he perceived you, remembered you for the unique ways that the planetary forces combined to create you. He didn't necessarily talk in a way that clearly revealed this, but I can share with you this is what I'm endeavoring to say when I recount that Chakrapani saw/understood people from an astrological perspective.
Our relationship with Chakrapani was uncommon for a number of reasons including that you could trust him; you trusted his intentions; you trusted his knowledge; and you trusted his discretion and judgement. This is not to say that he wanted you to sit passively by and have him pronounce his edicts...not at all! He wanted to engage you, interact with you and stimulate you to go within and find your own truths. He hoped that his words would help you reflect further to achieve a deeper, more profound understanding of self. This was his intention.
His instincts, honed over many decades and many thousands of clients, guided how he would share what he saw in your chart. Maybe he had to be tough with you, maybe you were resistant, but, for whatever reason, he felt it the right time, or the right thing, to be forthright, even against your protestations. Still, there was kindness there - you felt that, and with time, inevitably his insights proved helpful if not invaluable. This was my experience over the years, and what I observed from what others have shared with me.
Sometimes the issues raised were from our questions, but more often it was simply during the normal course of a reading, and Chakrapani's observations were timeless. I continue to find myself reflecting on things he said in early consultations that have guided me during the ensuing years. Many people have shared this feedback regarding their experiences with Chakrapani as well, and how wonderful it is to play back old readings - some lovingly preserved from the days of cassettes! Chakrapani's insights pierced to the core of the matter and often represented issues or conditions that proved relevant throughout one's life.
We all wanted to hear his interpretation of our chart - we wanted to understand what he felt were the salient points, and the timings - it was wonderful to have someone of insight and vision reflect on our favorite subject! But I believe that more than that, because Chakrapani resided in a place that grasped and thoroughly submitted to the terms of life, his wisdom translated to a kind of unique peace and acceptance that we felt in his presence. He understood the necessity of going through life's trials and tribulations, and he did it with grace. Implicit was his belief that there was no point in resisting or resenting what could not be changed - what constituted life's "given". The objective was to accept what were our worldly lessons, putting one's focus on how to effectively employ self-awareness to use our strengths to best advantage.
Ultimately, independent of the content of his chart interpretation, a reading with Chakrapani, at its heart, was not an intellectual process, even though it involved the intellect; a reading was not about information, although the information was valuable. Importantly, a reading with Chakrapani was imbued with a kind of loving acceptance born of a state of mind without judgement or acrimony. Something of who he was and the support and acceptance he felt for you allowed you to relax and let down your guard, which allowed you to be more open and receptive. He somehow put you at ease regardless of your troubles, burdens or questions. This was a unique feature of being in his presence such that you could take in his guidance and absorb it at a deeper level than otherwise possible.
His understanding transcended the glib, superficial aphorisms that abound; it went deep, and, when you were in his company you somehow mingled with him in that space, even if for just a short while. That experience in itself could be very healing. How it happened, it's hard to say. Maybe his state of awareness somehow translated to the openness in his face, in his trusting manner, and in the feeling of goodwill that surrounded him, and we responded in kind. When you were with him you relaxed into a sense of, yes - good news, or troubled waters - it's okay - it's all for the better.
There were always many hugs around Chakrapani but typically not initiated by him as he was somewhat reserved in that sense. But you felt you were in his embrace all the while sitting with him. He held you with warmth and good cheer, always in his signature style, seemingly without effort or contrivance. You were hardly aware of how extraordinary the exchange was except that on leaving you found yourself craving the warmth of his embrace once more.
Your reunions with him were much anticipated! How wonderful it was to share the love and the intimacy forged over many years - or if only in recent times. If you were meant to convene in this life, the encounter stood on its own merit, regardless.
In any event, with time, we inevitably became attached, and from time-to-time we reflected it would be hard to lose him - he had become such a unique and treasured person in our lives. And, of course, it has been hard to adjust to life without his dear presence among us - that wonderfully kind face, that lovely laughter, the profound wisdom that grounded us and brought such peace and calm.
Chakrapani was a simple person, which is to say - he cultivated simplicity. But his simplicity was distilled from complexity because he well understood the intricate network of competing issues and values that comprises human nature, as well as the many ironies that we face, and compromises and disappointments we're confronted with, and the many ways we must adjust ourselves to the harsh realities of this world. Chakrapani had a profound grasp of all the subtle competing forces, but he chose to keep it simple, to stay humble and to seek God's grace.
This is what comes to me as I reflect on my dear friend, my cherished companion of 30 odd years. What great good fortune I had to share my life with him, and what a blessing he was to all of us who knew him. As we pause a moment to remember him on his birthday, March 29, may it be with happiness and gratitude for what we shared together and with appreciation for his kind soul.
God bless you all and thank you for your love and loyalty to Chakrapani over all the years. It meant so much to him to be a part of your lives as well.
In loving gratitude,
Dianne
