Linda K. Creech

03/10/2023

Each week Leslie Vernick (or one of the coaches on her staff) answers a question that's been sent in. This week's question, sad to say in one form or another, is not an uncommon one that I hear in my counseling office. The question presented was, "Am I selfish for stopping my enabling behaviors?" What do you think Leslie's answer was? Take a few minutes to read and find out!

Morning friend, Next week I’m going to Paris with my granddaughter for her 13th birthday. Each of my granddaughters get to pick where they would like to go for this special milestone. I thought we’d better do this at 13 years old instead of 18 because by 18 they may not want to hang out…

03/06/2023

I love this quote by Byron Kehler, M.S., the founder of Story Informed Trauma Therapy (SITT):

“Whatever wisdom I might possess is not due to my lack of brokenness, but because of it. We are all broken, what matters is what we choose to do with it. What matters is what we create with it. What we let it do to us.”

11/06/2022

If you're wondering how to go about setting up a personal boundary or even what that's all about, take a few minutes and read a recent blog post from Leslie Vernick where she discussed this very thing.

Morning friend, This is a busy week this week for me. A lot is happening and I’d appreciate your prayers especially Thursday, Friday and Saturday during our conference. Next week I will be leaving for a cruise that we booked pre-covid and are finally able to go. My coaches will be answering some o...

06/20/2022

Don't go at life alone! We need each other - especially someone who has our back, who understands us. Someone who is there when we need comfort, when we need shoulder to cry on. I was listening to a webinar this morning and wanted to share a quote from Kenneth Sanderfer who co-wrote "Created for Connection" with Sue Johnson. The book is the Christian version of Sue's book for couples entitled, Hold Me Tight: Seven Conversations for a Lifetime of Love.

06/20/2022

"To suffer is inevitable. To suffer in isolation is intolerable." Kenneth Sanderfer (Certified EFT Therapist, Supervisor & Trainer)

05/23/2022

Do I welcome the pain or challenges in my life as a way for God to grow me into becoming more and more like Him? In Ephesians 5:1 Paul urges us to become “imitators of God.” Or do I try and avoid the pain as a temporary fix never to grow from it? Will I find that avoidance just causes me and others who are in relationship with me more pain and heartache in the long run?

I came across the following quote, which is from Scott Peck’s book, The Road Less Traveled: A New Psychology of Love, Traditional Values, and Spiritual Growth and want to share it with you…

“Fearing the pain involved, almost all of us, to a greater or lesser degree, attempt to avoid problems. We procrastinate, hoping that they will go away. We ignore them, forget them, pretend they do not exist. We even take drugs to assist us in ignoring them, so that by deadening ourselves to the pain we can forget the problems that cause the pain. We attempt to skirt around problems rather than meet them head on. We attempt to get out of them rather than suffer through them.”

06/30/2020

If the goal is NOT to avoid conflict and conflict happens, what is the goal? What is the goal of conflict?

Please read this short post from The Gottman Institute's "Marriage Minute." If you like it, go to their website and sign up to have the Marriage Minute sent to your email inbox each week!

Understanding doesn’t mean you agree, which is okay because you don’t need to resolve your conflicts. You just need to manage them.

06/25/2020

It is not the lack of conflict that produces a satisfying close connection in a relationship, but how conflict is handled. Too many times I have couples come into my office because one partner is ready to leave and the other thought things were great. "We never argued! I thought we had a good marriage."

The goal is not to have a conflict-free marriage, but one that is open to hearing your partner's perspective: both of you! It is being open to listen to your partner's side and validating their experience and only after you know they feel heard and understood do you then softly, simply, and slowing express your side.

05/05/2020

If you're struggling with forgiving because of the thought of reconciliation, please read my post yesterday on the Encouragement From Women Who've Been There page. And while you're there, scan down and read other thoughts from women who've been there.

Forgiveness and Reconciliation: Are They the Same?
By: Linda K. Creech

“And be ye kind one to another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God for Christ's sake hath forgiven you.”
‭‭Ephesians‬ ‭4:32‬

Reading through some old journals of mine, I came across sermon notes from a few years ago. In it the preacher spoke of forgiveness.

“How can I not forgive someone who has wronged me, who has hurt me, when I have been so forgiven by God Himself?” Reading that as a Christian therapist, however, made me think of the following…

God’s forgiveness is there. It is a free gift for anyone to receive. It’s there, just for the asking. God does not force His forgiveness on anyone. No, it’s a choice He allows each person to make. Yet, it’s there, just for the asking.

God’s forgiveness is there. It is not received, however, until there is the acknowledgment of where that individual is in relation to God. Until there is a confession, an agreement with God, of what they have done to sin against Him. Until there is an admission of guilt or wrong before God, admitting what they have done to cause the deep wound that created the chasm between them – the separation between them and their Creator. Then, and only then, will forgiveness be afforded the repentant person and reconciliation can occur.

God is reconciling sinful man to Himself through the blood of Jesus Christ. But the reconciliation does not occur until there is an admittance of wrong - the admittance of the wound caused - until that person acknowledges their sin and asks for forgiveness.

God knows their heart and if there is true repentance. Scripture tells us that God searches our hearts and knows even the motives behind our thoughts. So, God knows if the person’s confession, their words, are true, and if true repentance is there. When that happens, then there is reconciliation.

Going back to the sermon notes…
I have to say I disagree. Forgiveness does NOT equate to reconciliation. No, my forgiveness is there. I have forgiven those who’ve wounded me so. Reconciliation, however, has not yet happened.
God’s forgiveness is there. He desires that all may come to know Him through His Son Jesus Christ. But God’s forgiveness is not given until it is sought.

Only when an individual admits their sin, believes that Jesus is God’s Son, that His death on the cross and resurrection from the dead made the only way for payment of their sins, confesses this to God asking for His forgiveness and surrendering total control of their life to Him, can there be reconciliation between that individual and their Creator.

Only when the person who wounded me comes to me acknowledging what they have done wrong to wound me and show that by their actions – I see a repentant heart and notice the difference in their behavior toward me that is consistent with what they are confessing – only then is reconciliation between us possible.

If you’ve had difficulty forgiving someone because you couldn’t see reconciling with them, then change your mindset!

You’re not reconciling. No, that comes after forgiveness and with several steps in between. Just sit alone with God and ask Him about forgiving that person. Ask Him to help you see them as He does.

Admit to Him you can’t do it on your own and ask Him to forgive them through you. Let Him do it for you and then when those feelings of hurt and anger resurface (and they will), take it as a reminder that that has already been taken care of. Thank God for that reminder!

God has taken Linda K. on a unique journey serving Him stateside in places like Lake Tahoe, NV, Lake Placid, NY, but mostly in ministry in Florida. Her journey has taken her to international work in Columbia, Jamaica, and Peru, as well as serving for 7 years as a missionary in Brazil. Her journey with God has also taken her through some very difficult times such her husband’s forced termination and caring for her mother for four years until her recent death. As a Christian therapist she hopes to lead people on a journey where they learn to strengthen their connection with God and each other.

www.LindaKCreech.com

04/17/2020

Here is the link for the online Broadway shows.


**Due to rights restrictions, this will be available for 24 hours in the UK and 48 hours in all other countries** Join us from Friday April 17th at 7pm UK ti...

04/17/2020

My last post talked about creative dates and I have just come upon a great one. Andrew Lloyd Webber is posting on YouTube every Friday at 2 PM (EDT), some of his greatest works. Tonight is The Phantom of the Opera.  The shows will only be posted for about 48 hours so be intentional and plan a time so that you and your spouse can have a great date together.