09/29/2025
Neuroscience has officially proven that a father’s roughhousing style of play is actually crucial for a child’s brain and development. Those games of “chase”, wrestling or tossing your child into the air are actually improving your child’s cognitive flexibility, emotional regulation and social intelligence.
The physical exertion and excitement of roughhousing triggers the release of brain-derived neurotrophic factor (BDNF). This protein acts like a “Miracle-Gro” for the brain, stimulating neuron growth in areas responsible for memory, logic and language.
A 2022 study on father-child rough-and-tumble play found that the frequency and quality of this interaction were positively linked to a child’s working memory. Working memory is a key component of executive function and is crucial for academic success.
By exposing children to unpredictable scenarios in a safe environment, roughhousing “rewires” their brains. This increases the connections between neurons in the cerebral cortex, improving a child’s ability to cope with unexpected obstacles and developing resilience.
Roughhousing with a larger, stronger adult also requires a child to learn self control. They learn to modulate their physical strength and how to respond appropriately when things get too rough. Dads can teach this by holding back their own strength and showing the child what is and is not okay.
The intense but joyful emotions involved in rough play provide a safe “training ground” for the child’s nervous system. They can experience high-arousal states and then practice calming down, which helps balance their stress response system. The fun and laughter help relieve anxiety and stress.
Also, during roughhousing, children learn to read and respond to social cues like facial expressions and body language. They learn to take turns, negotiate, and understand when another’s persons fun has turned into discomfort. This builds empathy and social competence.
Children who regularly engage in high-quality, safe roughhousing with their fathers tend to be less physically aggressive with peers by learning to distinguish between playful, cooperative contact and real aggression.
PMID: 35883947, 19431190
