Jake Thiessen, PhD

11/17/2025

Conventional wisdom says couples just need to communicate better and learn to problem-solve.

But here’s the truth:
It’s not just about the words you use — it’s about the emotional current underneath.

One tiny shift in tone, posture, or timing can change the entire trajectory of a conversation (or an argument).

11/14/2025

What makes a relationship grow?

It’s not luck.
It’s not even just love.

It’s a combination of four essential ingredients:
✨ Patience
✨ Support
✨ Balance
✨ Knowledge

They don’t show up all at once. But when you nurture them over time, they create the conditions for deep connection.

Start with one.
Then keep going.

11/12/2025

In the chaos of everyday life, simple gestures like a good kiss carry more weight than we realize.

A little intention can go a long way.

It goes without saying: intimate relationships are complex. Two unique individuals come together in an interactive dance of emotions and behaviors that becomes their signature way of relating. When a relationship challenge arises, improving communication skills and scheduling more date nights...

11/10/2025

“You’re crazy if you thought that was okay.”
“You never help me around the house.”
“You always do this.”

Sound familiar?

These are more than just sharp words — they’re signs of certainty.
And certainty is a conversation killer.

When you’re absolutely sure you’re right, there’s no room left for curiosity, repair, or connection.

But when you replace certainty with wonder, you create space to actually hear each other.

📘 From Tiny Shifts — a book about the small things that make a big difference. https://amzn.to/46T8Fgi

11/07/2025

Appetizers and desserts are great.
But if you’re hungry for something lasting,
you’ll need more than chemistry.

Sustainable love is built
in the day-to-day interactions,
the willingness to repair,
and the choice to stay curious

11/05/2025

In every healthy relationship, there are three living things: me, you, and the relationship.

When we forget this, we risk losing ourselves and each other.

The relationship isn’t just something you’re in.
It’s something you co-create

11/03/2025

That’s exactly what Tiny Shifts is about.
Not blame.
Not shame.
Just honest reflection, and the courage to show up a little better than before.

📘 Gentle prompts.
💬 Real conversations.
❤️ Small changes that ripple outward.

Start making your own tiny shifts today. https://amzn.to/46T8Fgi

10/31/2025

Couples therapy isn’t just for couples on the brink.
It’s for couples who are stuck in silence, in cycles, and in disconnection.

Relationships don’t have to hit rock bottom before they get better. You just have to decide that something needs to change.

Tiny Shifts start with small, honest steps, like this one.

10/29/2025

Every relationship hits turbulence.
What determines whether a couple makes it through isn’t how perfectly they communicate – it’s how they respond when things get messy.

Can you sit with discomfort without turning away?
Can you absorb tension without lashing out?
Can you stay present even when it’s hard?

Emotional regulation isn’t just an individual skill – it’s a relational one.
And it’s often the difference between growing together or growing apart.

10/28/2025

Humming in the background of every relationship are "shadow truths" that affect even the most mundane interactions.

There's an unacknowledged subtext that underlies most of the conversations couples have. Discovering it can help overcome an impasse.

10/27/2025

It’s one of the hardest questions you’ll ever ask:
Can this relationship be repaired… or is it time to walk away?

There’s no perfect formula.
But there are some clues:

🌀 Are both people willing to do the work?
🌀 Is there emotional safety to speak the truth?
🌀 Is there still a thread of curiosity about each other, and what could be rebuilt?

In Tiny Shifts, I explore how real change happens — not through ultimatums or quick fixes, but through small, intentional moments of honesty, repair, and connection.

Sometimes the shift is staying.
Sometimes it’s letting go.
But either way, the work begins with clarity.

10/24/2025

📚 Reader Review
“The rhythm of the book invites you to try one small adjustment at a time, then notice how those ‘tiny shifts’ compound into meaningful change…”

That’s the heart of Tiny Shifts — not sweeping fixes, but steady, practical movement toward deeper connection.

This reader captured it perfectly:
✅ Hopeful without overpromising
✅ Practical prompts you can actually use
✅ A shared language couples can grow with

Tiny Shifts is available now: https://amzn.to/46T8Fgi

It goes without saying: intimate relationships are complex. Two unique individuals come together in an interactive dance of emotions and behaviors that becomes their signature way of relating. When a relationship challenge arises, improving communication skills and scheduling more date nights...