12/24/2025
When I finished writing the first part of this series about releasing fear from the psoas, I didn’t expect my own body to answer back so quickly.
Later that week, I went to Pilates.
My teacher had us place a ball under the sacrum, feet in the straps on the reformer. A familiar setup. Something I’ve done many times before. I know my body well.
But the moment she asked me to lower my legs, draw the pelvis and ribs inward, and find support from the center, something shocked my system.
It was hard.
Not weak-hard.
Not “out of practice” hard.
My body was pulling away.
She could see it immediately.
“What’s going on with your body?” she asked gently. “It’s pulling away.”
I paused. Took a breath. Let her guide my legs—stretching, reaching—until I found some semblance of stability. I felt okay again. Regulated enough. She moved on to the next person.
And that’s when the tears came.
Use the link in my profile to read the full article on Substack.