11/13/2025
The moment a loved one with dementia gets lost while driving is a turning point. It's a crisis that requires immediate action for their safety and the safety of others on the road.
Here are 3 steps to take now:
1. Call the doctor and relay specific, factual details of the recent driving incidents (e.g., "Dad got lost for 3 hours on a familiar route")
The doctor can submit a letter of medical concern directly to the Department of Motor Vehicles (DMV). This ensures the DMV initiates a re-examination, and the doctor becomes the source, not you.
2. While the official process with the doctor is underway, you must still have the conversation.
Speak to your loved one and frame the request to stop driving around their safety and well-being. Ask them to voluntarily hand over the keys and discuss alternatives for reliable, safe transportation. This is critical for dignity and respect, even if it leads to resistance.
3. If the doctor is unwilling or unable to act quickly, you can file an anonymous DMV report. Send a formal, written letter to your state's DMV asking them to re-examine your loved one's fitness to drive.
The DMV is legally bound to investigate the claim and will usually send a re-examination notice. They are also legally obligated to honor your request for anonymity and will not disclose you as the source.
⚠️ Crucial Warning: The legal risk of inaction.
Did you know that if your loved one causes an accident, and you or another family member knew they were unfit to drive and failed to intervene, you could be found liable under the legal concept of negligent entrustment? This is why acting immediately and decisively is non-negotiable.
Need help navigating this painful moment? Contact us now for guidance on a safety assessment and placement plan.
