The Center for Christian Counseling, Consultation & Training, Inc.

02/10/2026

Escalations and meltdowns are not teachable moments. The teaching actually must come in our everyday words and actions, and in showing our children that even while they have overwhelming, uncomfortable emotions, we can still be their safe person that helps them to feel safe.

Want more support with your parenting? Check us out at www.christiancounselingmadison.org to find out more and connect with one of our providers.

During a meltdown, the goal is not to 'fix' or 'stop' the behaviour.
The goal is to help the nervous system return to safety.

What we say — and how we say it — makes a profound difference.

When a child is overwhelmed, the thinking parts of the brain are offline.
They can’t reason, respond, or problem-solve yet.
They need co-regulation, not correction.

This post offers phrases you can use at each stage of the meltdown cycle — not to control the moment, but to support safety, connection, and repair.

Because when a child learns:
“I can have big feelings and still be safe with you,”
they develop emotional resilience, trust, and self-understanding.

If you found this helpful and would like a deeper breakdown of each phase (with step-by-step support strategies), you’ll find the full Timeline of a Meltdown resource via link in comments below ⬇️ or via Linktree Shop in Bio.

Save this to come back to when things feel overwhelming

02/10/2026

We cannot pour from an empty cup!

02/10/2026

There is no such thing as a perfect relationships. But the connection and growth is built through repair, after the ruptures. In other words, when we mess up, we get a golden opportunity to make things right and, in the process, strengthen our relationships with others.

Want support in strengthening your relationships? Check us out at www.christiancounselingmadison.org to learn more and connect with one of our providers.

Healthy relationships aren’t defined by the *absence* of conflict.

They’re defined by what happens *after* the conflict.

Because every relationship has ruptures:
misattunements, misunderstandings, sharp words, defensiveness, shutdown, overwhelm…life.

What changes the entire “climate” of a relationship is whether ruptures reliably lead to repair.

02/10/2026

Connection isn’t just for Valentine’s Day or anniversaries. Connection happens over small moments, every day.

Want to learn more about connecting with your spouse? Check us out at www.christiancounselingmadison.com to explore your options and connect with one of our providers.

02/10/2026

Practicing self-compassion is key to mental health.

Want to learn more about self-compassion and self-care? Check us out at www.christiancounselingmadison.com to find out more and connect with one of our providers.

Trauma affects how we see ourselves, others, and the world.
When we catch ourselves in negative self thoughts, it's helpful to ask, "would I say this to someone else? Would I allow someone to say this to my friend or my child?"
When we recognize our negative thought patterns we can begin to flip the script from criticism to compassion.
Having self-compassion isn’t about gaslighting yourself and pretending everything is okay when it’s not. It’s noticing what you're going through, giving yourself space to feel it, and responding with kindness and understanding (the way we would with a friend).

02/10/2026

If you love someone who is hurting, this is for you, too!

Want to support, or get supported in healing? Check us out at www.christiancounselingmadison.com to find out more and connect with one of our providers.

If you love someone who’s hurting, this book series is for you too. You can’t fix them. But you can understand and support them.
Learning about PTSD isn't just for those who have PTSD. If you have a loved one who is suffering, becoming trauma informed can help you understand what they're going through and better equip you to get them the help they need.
https://bit.ly/PTSDRecovery

02/10/2026

Keep your eye on the heavenly prize!

01/28/2026

Behavior reflects a gap in skills, not character flaws. Read below for some great insight into why this is!

Want more support for your parenting journey? We can help with that! Check us out at www.christiancounselingmadison.com to learn more and connect with one of our providers.

If children could do better, they would.

What often gets labelled as “defiance,” “laziness,” or “not caring” is usually a gap in skills — not a lack of willingness.

Skills like emotional regulation, impulse control, flexibility, and problem-solving develop over time.
They’re shaped by brain development, nervous system capacity, and lived experience.

When we respond to behaviour as a skill gap rather than a character flaw, our focus shifts:
from punishment → support
from control → connection
from “what’s wrong with my child?” → “what does their brain need right now?”

This doesn’t remove boundaries.
It changes how we hold them.

Save this as a reminder for the hard moments.

01/28/2026

Transitional objects, such as blankies or stuffed animals, have been shown to soothe nervous systems of children significantly faster than through words alone. They are a great tool in helping children learn healthy coping skills and emotional regulation!

Want more tools for your parenting? We can help with that! Check us out at www.christiancounselingmadison.com to learn more and connect with one of our providers.

Imagine a small child gripping their teddy bear as the world feels wild and loud. This simple act is not just for comfort; it is powerful self-regulation rooted in biology. Research into ""transitional objects"" shows that children with a favorite bear or blanket can soothe their nervous systems significantly faster than through words alone.

The soft touch and familiar scent signal to the brain that they are safe, lowering stress hormones in overwhelming moments. This is not a sign of being weak; instead, it shows a child is learning to manage emotions and stress in a healthy, independent way. Every gentle squeeze is teaching them how to find peace—lessons that will help them for years to come."

01/28/2026

Healthy coping tools can calm our nervous system and give us peace when control may not be an option. Read below to find a list of healthy coping tools from A - Z.

Want help developing healthy coping habits in your life? We are here to help! Check us out at www.christiancounselingmadison.com to explore your options and connect with one of our providers.

Hope isn’t pretending triggers vanish overnight.
Hope is knowing that with practice and support, they lose power.
What feels overwhelming today can one day feel manageable.
Along with therapy, healthy coping tools are one of the ways you can help your nervous system feel steady instead of spinning.

01/28/2026

Communicating successfully with teens requires parents to attend to their timing and tone. The Gottmans have a great resource to help you communicate with your teen, below.

Want support for your teen, or your parenting? We can help with that! Check us out at www.christiancounselingmadison.com to explore your options and connect with one of our providers.