Well With Xtina

Well With Xtina Empowering you to self-heal & reconnect to self through spiritual growth.

11/13/2025

The plot twist: once you realize you are the source of your own torment, you realize you can be the source of your healing.

If you can romanticize your pain, then you can romanticize the joy in your life too. You just have to choose to use your power in that way.

Go back a few posts to see Part 1 of what really broke me to lead me here again… sometimes it’s true that to find yourself you must first become lost 🤍

I don’t make the rules sorry.

11/11/2025

You always felt like you were too much or not enough, with no in-between... because the relationship you really should be focusing on is the one you have with yourself.

When you become all that you need, you no longer look to someone else for it.

You stop yearning for someone to come save you and sweep you off your feet. You stop relying on others to make you feel worthy and useful. You stop needing someone to choose you to prove you’re loveable.

Instead you know that anything outside of you is just an addition to everything you can—and do—give yourself.

No more performing for love.
No more living off of scraps of attention.
No more trusting anyone more than you trust yourself.

I don’t take pics to document the lows and it shows
11/10/2025

I don’t take pics to document the lows and it shows

11/10/2025

At the end of the day, when you see that it’s actually about you and that you’re responsible for your life—it’s heartbreaking when you realize that you are choosing sadness and grief and to romanticize your pain.

But it’s also empowering to realize that YOU are the one choosing. If you can choose to feel the pain, then you can also choose to feel the joy, love, and happiness that still exists.

When you remember that you have the power to choose, you can begin to build your life again.

11/09/2025

What really broke me was that I thought I rose above the pattern, but I really didn’t do that much better than the last time.

The heartbreak isn’t actually about a guy. It’s about how you felt loved, how secure you felt, and how everything you thought you could have from someone was possible-being gone overnight. It’s about why you can’t fulfill those needs for yourself. It’s about why you yearn for someone to take care of you instead of taking care of yourself. It’s about why you choose to believe old stories and embody old narratives. It’s about why you have a choice and you’re choosing the one where you have no power.

At the end of the day, when you see that it’s actually about you and that you’re responsible for your life—it’s heartbreaking when you realize that you are choosing sadness and grief and to romanticize your pain.

We never dated, but it was still real. I fear it’s a pain that will linger for a long while.Not because I miss him, but ...
11/06/2025

We never dated, but it was still real. I fear it’s a pain that will linger for a long while.

Not because I miss him, but because of how he represented that it was possible to have so much of what my heart ached for. For what it thought wasn’t possible for me.

My abandonment wound was transformed into feeling safe and secure.

My insecurities were seen as beautiful through his eyes.

My fear of being too much was exactly how much he loved receiving from me.

I felt adored and wanted for being my whole self. Chosen without having to perform or adjust.

Now I mourn the safety I once felt because now I’ll have to rebuild everything since the last time I had to love myself. Having to fall in love with myself again and again.

10/31/2025

Scared you didn’t I? 👻

I guarantee these will have men running away from you this year because dating is just that scary apparently

Even if you have the best support system, only you can do the work to change your beliefs and love yourself enough to he...
10/23/2025

Even if you have the best support system, only you can do the work to change your beliefs and love yourself enough to heal the wounds.

No one can make you believe how amazing they think you are if you don’t see it. And that’s where the work is.

It’s tough and it’s ugly when the pain is layered. But you don’t have to wait until your mind is “positive, love, and light” before you start putting in the work.

(Btw see my last post for what doing the work actually looks like)

Do it heartbroken. Do it in grief. Do it scared.

You don’t need to love begin to heal yourself. You need discipline. Showing up for yourself is where you become the example of how to love yourself. The consistency is where you’ll build self-love, self-worth, and self-trust.

🖤

Because I romanticize everything, I’m usually the one that’s breaking my own heart. From the outside looking in it’s eas...
08/16/2025

Because I romanticize everything, I’m usually the one that’s breaking my own heart.

From the outside looking in it’s easy to see what clearly isn’t aligned, what needs to go, and what more could be.

But when you’re in it, you’re blinded by the invisible strings that tether you. You hold onto stories that serve your illusions. You set unrealistic expectations for the wrong people. You seek closure when what you really need is to disconnect to reconnect to yourself.

You romanticize the potential, cherishing the story of what could’ve been as something beautiful.

You romanticize the pain, telling yourself your soul signed up for these tests.

You romanticize the lessons, allowing yourself to rot and feel the feelings to the point where you freeze your outer life to remain inward.

But what you really needed to do was to accept what’s being shown to you for face value. Some things aren’t meant to be romanticized. Some things just are what they are and nothing more.

That’s a hard truth for a romantic to hear.

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