CommunityBeat

01/11/2026

COMMUNITYBEAT — COMFORT FOOD ANALYSIS DESK

We examined a heated matchup this week.

Not politically.
Emotionally.

Grilled cheese versus hot ham and cheese.
Winner receives tomato soup.

Arguments were presented.

Grilled cheese claimed purity.
Simplicity.
A long-standing relationship with the soup, built on trust and melted agreement.

Hot ham and cheese countered with ambition.
Protein.
A belief that it could “handle the soup” if given the opportunity.

Mace argued the ham brought “leadership.”
No one asked him to elaborate.

In the end, tomato soup chose tradition.
Grilled cheese earned the dip.
Hot ham and cheese was advised to pursue mustard-based futures.

No feelings were hurt.
Lunch was respected.

This concludes our review.

01/05/2026

…or so the system thought.

Turns out the sign was loose.
The newsroom reacted anyway.

A very serious investigation followed.
(It involved a screwdriver.)

Welcome to CommunityBeat WV —
a fictional newsroom inspired by real West Virginia life,
where not everything is urgent,
but everything is worth noticing.

01/05/2026

BREAKING NEWS 🚨

…or so the system thought.

Turns out the sign was loose.
The newsroom reacted anyway.

A very serious investigation followed.
(It involved a screwdriver.)

Welcome to CommunityBeat WV —
a fictional newsroom inspired by real West Virginia life,
where not everything is urgent,
but everything is worth noticing.

01/02/2026

Most mornings, nothing breaks.

The coffee gets made.
The lights come on before anyone remembers turning them on.
Someone panics early. Someone else reminds them it’s fine.

We don’t chase headlines here.
We notice patterns.
We write down the parts people usually skip.

If you’ve ever lived in a place that feels familiar without being loud —
you’ll recognize this.

Welcome to CommunityBeat.

A fictional newsroom inspired by West Virginia life.

01/02/2026

Nothing broke.
Nothing went live.
No alarms were triggered.

By newsroom standards,
this was a successful Friday morning.

☕️📰

01/02/2026

FRIDAY ENERGY

It was agreed, without discussion, that Friday had arrived earlier than expected.

This conclusion was reached by observing the coffee, which was stronger than usual and therefore suspicious.

No one trusted the calendar.
The coffee, however, was telling the truth.

04/19/2025

Yeah, Mr. Wilson, laugh a little 🤷‍♂️

DENNIS THE MENACE 😍