Alexis Nelson- MFT

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Why are certain things so hard to let go of? If you're my dog Juno, everything is hard to let go of 😂💛There are real psy...
02/27/2026

Why are certain things so hard to let go of?
If you're my dog Juno, everything is hard to let go of 😂💛

There are real psychological reasons certain things stick!

🧠 Why Some Things Don’t Just Go Away

1. Your nervous system doesn’t operate on logic.
-You can intellectually understand something is over, but if your body experienced it as a threat, betrayal, abandonment, or humiliation, your nervous system may still be on alert.
2. Resolution doesn’t always equal repair.
-Conflict can be “settled” without emotional safety being restored. If safety wasn’t rebuilt, your system may keep scanning for danger.
3. Rumination is often a protection strategy.
-When your brain replays something, it’s usually trying to prevent it from happening again, make sense of what felt confusing, regain a sense of control, or validate your own experience.
4. Old wounds attach to new experiences.
-Sometimes the situation wasn’t just about that moment. It tapped into something older (attachment injuries, past betrayal, unmet needs, or patterns that feel familiar).
When the past gets activated, it feels bigger than the present.

💭 What does it look like to let go in a healthy way?

-Letting go is not: pretending it didn’t hurt, forcing forgiveness, minimizing your experience, shaming yourself for still feeling something.
-Moving on in a healthy way looks like: fully acknowledging the impact, feeling the emotion instead of bypassing it, making meaning of what it taught you, setting boundaries if needed, integrating the experience instead of erasing it.

Letting go is less about “dropping it” and more about your nervous system no longer needing to carry it. Sometimes letting go doesn’t require more logic, it requires more compassion.

Let's talk synapses! 🧠✨As both a therapist and a new mom, I want to talk about one of the most fascinating parts of earl...
02/12/2026

Let's talk synapses! 🧠✨

As both a therapist and a new mom, I want to talk about one of the most fascinating parts of early child development (in my opinion).
When babies are born, their brains are wildly over-connected. They have far more neural connections (synapses) than they’ll ultimately keep. In the first few years of life, the brain goes through a process called synaptic pruning which is strengthening the connections that are used often and trimming away the ones that aren’t.
In simple terms:
The experiences babies have literally shape the architecture of their brains. Every time you:
respond to their cry, make eye contact, smile back at them, talk, sing, soothe them when they’re distressed, etc., you are reinforcing neural pathways.
These pathways are related to: safety, emotional regulation, attachment, language, and social connection.
This doesn’t mean you have to be perfect. It doesn’t mean babies can’t handle frustration or brief stress. In fact, small, repairable stress (like waiting a moment before being picked up) helps build resilience.
What matters most is consistent positive interaction and repair. A regulated caregiver helps build a regulated nervous system. A responsive relationship builds secure attachment. Safety wires the brain for connection.

I'm excited to share that I’m officially enrolled in my final semester of grad school!  🎓This milestone has also been a ...
12/13/2025

I'm excited to share that I’m officially enrolled in my final semester of grad school! 🎓

This milestone has also been a reminder that even as therapists, we are human first. We still experience stress, emotional depletion, and difficulty prioritizing self-care.

Supporting mental health isn’t only about insight, it’s also about understanding the body and nervous system. Natural ways to boost oxytocin, dopamine, serotonin, and endorphins can play a meaningful role in mood regulation, connection, and overall well-being.

In the second photo, there are some natural things that I love to try and incorporate to help me stay grounded and stabilize my mood (especially post partum!). I hope that these can help you out as well! 😊

*Meme and info graphic are not mine*

Sometimes my brain feels like this, especially lately with so much going on! 🤣 So I want to talk about focus and things ...
11/09/2025

Sometimes my brain feels like this, especially lately with so much going on! 🤣 So I want to talk about focus and things that can help. 😊

◇Why Your Brain Resists Simple Tasks
→ Executive dysfunction in everyday terms: you know that thing where you can’t send one email even though it takes two minutes? Sometimes that’s not laziness, it’s your nervous system trying to protect you from being overwhelmed.

◇Task Paralysis: When You Want to Start but Can’t
→ Sometimes freeze response, perfectionism, or fear of failure is behind it.

◇Focus is a Skill, Not a Personality Trait
→ Think of attention like a muscle that can be trained through small, consistent habits (environment setup, breaks, body movement).

◇Why Your Motivation Comes in Waves
→ Fluctuating motivation is normal and it is linked to energy cycles, hormones, stress, and/or seasons of life.

◇The Myth of Constant Productivity
→ Rest is a part of productivity, not the opposite of it. Rest promots nervous system regulation and prevents burnout.

◇Remember:
→ Guilt and shame drain motivation, while compassion and curiosity get things moving again.
→ Limit overstimulation and multitasking, because our brains are wired to avoid stress, not chase it.
→ Stay motivated for your future self because they are someone worth showing up for and also give yourself compassion.

*Artwork is not mine*🌱 Boundaries: Why They Matter & How to Set Them Boundaries are the invisible lines that protect our...
10/12/2025

*Artwork is not mine*

🌱 Boundaries: Why They Matter & How to Set Them

Boundaries are the invisible lines that protect our time, energy, and emotional well-being. They help us build healthier relationships with ourselves and with others.

✨ Why boundaries are important:

They keep us from becoming overwhelmed or resentful. They clarify what we need to feel safe and respected. They can help build the life you desire.

💪 How to set boundaries:

1. Get clear on your needs. What drains you? What helps you thrive?
2. Communicate directly. Use “I” statements: “I can’t take calls after 9pm.”
3. Stay consistent. Boundaries work best when they’re upheld regularly.
4. Be prepared for pushback. Not everyone will understand right away and that’s okay.

Sometimes, people with good intentions still push our boundaries. They may say, “I’m just being nice,” or “I was only trying to help.” But even kindness can cross a line if it ignores our limits. Respect means listening when someone says no, not assuming our intentions make it okay.

💡 Remember: Boundaries aren’t walls to shut people out they’re doors that open to healthier, more respectful connections. You have the right to uphold boundaries that feel good to you, and when others decide to respect and support your boundaries, they are respecting and supporting you as a person.

Mid-August, my amazing partner and I welcomed our first child! ✨️🫶 When my partner and I decided to start our family, we...
09/06/2025

Mid-August, my amazing partner and I welcomed our first child! ✨️🫶 When my partner and I decided to start our family, we were overwhelmed with all the information out there (a lot of good, and also a lot of bad). I wanted to share some of the information as an MFT that I find most helpful (derived from evidence-based practices) and we will be focusing on as new parents. Now it's my turn to give unsolicited advice! 😉😂

1. A Secure Attachment Relationship: Kids don’t need perfect parents, but they do need safe, consistent, emotionally attuned ones. You're their safe space as they enter this world and the way you show up for them makes lasting impressions.

2. Authoritative Parenting Style: Not authoritarian (harsh/rigid) or permissive (hands-off), but warm + firm. Setting clear boundaries, while still offering respect and age-appropriate autonomy encourages responsibility, emotional regulation, and self-esteem.

3. Emotion Coaching: Helping kids name, express, and regulate emotions (vs. minimizing or punishing emotional expression) is linked to stronger mental health and better relationships long-term. Letting kids know it's okay to have emotions, and there are appropriate ways to express and regulate those emotions.

4. Modeling (Not Just Teaching): Kids learn way more from what you model than what you say. How you handle stress, conflict, communication, apologies, and self-care teaches them how to do those things for themselves.

5. A Safe and Predictable Environment: Structure, routines, and reliability help kids feel safe and regulated. Not rigid schedules, but rhythms they can count on, especially during tough times.

6. Letting Them Struggle Sometimes: “Good enough” parenting allows space for natural consequences, problem-solving, and autonomy. Letting kids have appropriate challenges can help create resilience and reasoning.

There are so many things that play into parenting and family dynamics! This is just the tip of the iceberg for these techniques and topics/psychoeducation that I really enjoy. 😊

Feeling on edge lately? (Pun intended because Koba likes to sit LITERALLY right on edges, often falling off the couch 😂)...
07/28/2025

Feeling on edge lately?
(Pun intended because Koba likes to sit LITERALLY right on edges, often falling off the couch 😂)

Feel overwhelmed or anxious?
(Peep the second photo of my anxious fur babies 💕)

Try the 5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Technique! 🍃

👀 5 Things you can see.
🤲 4 Things you can touch.
👂3 Things you can hear.
👃2 Things you can smell.
👅1 Thing you can taste.

This technique helps to interrupt overwhelming thoughts and sensations, promoting a sense of calm and control! 💆‍♀️

Another one of my favorite tools! 😊 Bids for connection. Sometimes we do not realize small gestures or attempts in our e...
07/15/2025

Another one of my favorite tools! 😊 Bids for connection. Sometimes we do not realize small gestures or attempts in our everyday relationships (romantic or platonic). Recognizing these bids and learning how to turn towards them can help improve relationships and build positive experiences within our relationships. ☀️

*Infographic is not mine*

A little laugh for your weekend! 😂All jokes aside, soothing your inner child is a powerful tool for healing unresolved e...
07/05/2025

A little laugh for your weekend! 😂

All jokes aside, soothing your inner child is a powerful tool for healing unresolved emotional wounds, especially those rooted in early childhood experiences. The "inner child" represents the vulnerable part of you that absorbed messages about safety, love, worth, and belonging. When those needs weren’t consistently met, that child part can remain stuck in pain or fear, and show up in adulthood.

🍃What “Soothing Your Inner Child” Looks Like:

• Connecting with the inner child.
• Validating feelings & comforting your inner child.
• Provide self-compassion & what was missing.

🧡How We Heal and Benefit from This:

• Regulation of Emotions-- When the inner child is soothed, it becomes easier to respond to emotions rather than react impulsively. You gain emotional regulation.
• Increased Self-Worth-- By nurturing the parts of yourself that felt unworthy or unseen, your adult self develops greater confidence and self-respect.
• Improved Relationships--You’re less likely to seek others to meet unmet childhood needs (e.g., rescuing, approval-seeking, people-pleasing) and more able to create secure, mutual bonds.
• Reduction in Shame-- Inner child work replaces shame with compassion, helping you feel less broken or “too much.”
• Empowerment-- You shift from feeling helpless and reactive to feeling grounded and in charge of your life.

My wonderful partner and I got married! 💕 In honor of that, I wanted to share some marital advice and insight that I fin...
06/11/2025

My wonderful partner and I got married! 💕 In honor of that, I wanted to share some marital advice and insight that I find really helpful. This is also applicable to any romantic relationship, it is not exclusive to marriage.

--Maintain respect, empathy, and emotional understanding for your partner, even when you have disagreements. Disagreements should not escalate to disrespect. It is you and your partner vs the problem, not vs each other. 🤗

--Find joy in the little moments. Remember to say "I love you", laugh together, send each other funny videos and make time for date nights. Just like anything else, relationships require maintenance and work. Small meaningful gestures do a lot. 🥰

--Maintain gratitude for your partner. It is natural for relationships to ebb and flow, but it's important to remain grateful for your partner and the reasons why you chose them to be your person. 🎯

--Compromise (but make sure it is reasonable, healthy and mutual), accountability, honesty, loyalty and communication are all very important in relationships. ☀️

Overall, there is a ton that goes into relationships. Therapists can help you navigate different dynamics, provide helpful tools and clarity regarding various situations. Reach out to book a session! 😊

✨️Communication Breakdown✨️ --Shout out to my fellow music lovers if that title made you sing the Led Zeppelin song! 🎵🧡-...
05/09/2025

✨️Communication Breakdown✨️
--Shout out to my fellow music lovers if that title made you sing the Led Zeppelin song! 🎵🧡
--Some fun pictures of our sweet puppies "communicating" in ways that wouldn't be very acceptable for people. 😂😉

☀️There can be many habits that we often do without realizing that can get in the way of effective communication and repair. Though nobody is perfect, it's important to strive for good communication practices and some of those are:

●Active Listening: Listen to understand, not necessarily to respond. Focus fully, reflect back what you hear, and ask clarifying questions.

●Use "I" Statements: This helps express your feelings and needs without assuming blame, helping to keep defensiveness at bay. An example of this format would be, "I feel ___ when ___ because ___, and I need ___.”

●Validation: Acknowledge the other person’s feelings, even if you don’t agree. Strive to maintain empathy; often times, people are trying to communicate something they need from the relationship and not trying to be critical.

This is just the tip of the iceberg! Effective Communication encompasses a lot more; as well as, takes a lot of practice and awareness. 🎯😊

✨️Resilience: The Quiet Motivation Behind the Chaos✨️Lately, I’ve been reflecting on resilience—not as a buzzword, but a...
05/04/2025

✨️Resilience: The Quiet Motivation Behind the Chaos✨️

Lately, I’ve been reflecting on resilience—not as a buzzword, but as a lived experience.

I went from high school straight into college, then on to building a home, starting my master's degree, beginning my therapy internship, maintaining relationships, holding on to hobbies (when I can), planning a wedding, and trying to maintain everyday life and responsibilities —all while working full-time.
There have been so many moments where I’ve wondered how I’m still going.

Truthfully? Some days I don’t feel like I am. Some days it feels like I’m barely keeping my head above water, and all the days blur together.

Resilience is not about being unaffected. It’s not about having everything together or being superhuman. It’s about showing up—again and again—even when it’s hard, especially when it’s hard.

Resilience isn’t always loud or pretty. Sometimes it looks like crying in the car and still going to work. It looks like making space for joy and hobbies, even in small ways. It looks like reaching out, resting when needed, and giving ourselves permission to be messy and human.

Resilience isn’t something you're born with; it’s something you build, moment by moment. Challenges look different for everyone and they're all valid! Some things that help me stay motivated and build resilience:

●Surround yourself with strong support! A healthy environment and strong support system (including yourself!) can catch you when you fall and remind you that you’re not alone.💪

●Advocate for your needs. Whether it’s asking for help, setting boundaries, or simply voicing what you need, standing up for yourself is a powerful act of self-preservation.🍃

●Reconnect with your “why.” When the journey feels heavy, remembering your goals and purpose can give you the fuel to keep going, even when motivation runs low.🎯

●Remaining grateful for the things and people in my life that make my journey easier and not harder! 🧡

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Murray, UT

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