Affirmations

06/29/2025

Alligator alcatraz

06/29/2025

05/01/2024

Keeping Hope Alive

“The hopeful man sees success where others see failure, sunshine where others see shadows and storm.”

—O. S. Marden

When wise men say, “Hope springs eternal,” they are reminding us that no matter how great the obstacles, the hope of winning out in the long run still exists. Hope is our friend when all else has failed. When we have strength of character and an energetic mind, hope always flourishes.

We discover that at the very brink of despair, we will find courage to keep trying as long as there is hope for success. After all, what have we got to lose? Without hope, we have no chance anyway. Our chance for glory comes when we keep trying even though all seems lost. Our hearts remain strong and brave when hope reminds us that challenges last until a game is over.

What light of hope can I keep burning within me today?

02/15/2023

You can’t drive straight on a twisting lane.
~Russian saying

What did it take to bring us to the point where we were willing to admit our powerlessness and unmanageability over our addiction? Most of us did not reach this point until we faced some horrible consequences not once, but over and over.

Even in recovery, our denial can be strong. If we approach our addiction only intellectually, without acknowledging our feelings, our chances for staying in denial are much greater. We can't rewrite the story of our life, and we can't wipe out the painful memories. Whatever we've done is done, and when we face up to that reality honestly, we can face up to powerlessness. We can reach out and ask for help, and we can start to help ourselves.

Admitting my powerlessness over my addiction offers me a way back from it. It is an invitation to accept myself as I am and go on from there.

02/14/2023

He that shuts love out, in turn, shall be shut out from love.
~Alfred Tennyson

Addiction caused us to turn away from love. We started to feel things weren't right; this feeling was a message of love from our Higher Power. We used denial or blame to turn away. Our family members told us they were worried; this was another message of love. We argued and blamed them. Our friends expressed concerns, still another message of love. We dumped them and got new friends. And then we wondered why we felt like love had turned its back on us.

Recovery pushes us back toward love. People treat us with care and kindness; these are messages of love. They ask that we turn to a Higher Power, a further message of love. We used to shut out love because our addiction demanded this of us. Now we must embrace love because our recovery requires this of us.

Prayer for the Day
Higher Power, help me to do what love asks of me, even when I'm scared.

Today's Action
I will list the ways I shut out love during my active addiction. Am I doing any of these today? I will use my Tenth Step to keep track of my relationship with love.

02/13/2023

Why are we surprised when fig trees bear figs?
~Margaret Titzel

A frequent source of discomfort and pain with adult children is unrealistic expectations. One of the greatest of these is expecting sane, rational, trusting behavior from those who may well not have it to give.

Alcoholism is a form of insanity - perhaps not the committable kind, but a disease that renders the victim incapable of behavior that most would call normal. Until the advent of recovery, the alcoholic is subject to a bewildering assortment of delusions, denials, manipulations, and subterfuges. In short, nonrecovering alcoholics are incapable of functioning in healthy relationships.

When we expect anything more from a loved and beloved nonrecovering alcoholic, we are setting ourselves up for heartbreak. Fig trees bear figs, not peaches. What we are able to do emanates from what we are, not from what we wish we were.

Today, I will not frustrate myself with unrealistic expectations. What I cannot change, I will accept.

02/12/2023

People-Pleasers
Have you ever been around people-pleasers? They tend to be displeasing. Being around someone who is turned inside out to please another is often irritating and anxiety producing.

People-pleasing is a behavior we may have adapted to survive in our family. We may not have been able to get the love and attention we deserved. We may not have been given permission to please ourselves, to trust ourselves, and to choose a course of action that demonstrated self-trust.

People-pleasing can be overt or covert. We may run around fussing over others, chattering a mile-a-minute when what we are really saying is, "I hope I'm pleasing you." Or, we may be more covert, quietly going through life making important decisions based on pleasing others.

Taking other people's wants and needs into consideration is an important part of our relationships. We have responsibilities to friends and family and employers. We have a strong inner responsibility to be loving and caring. But, people-pleasing backfires. Not only do others get annoyed with us, we often get annoyed when our efforts to please do not work as we planned. The most comfortable people to be around are those who are considerate of others but ultimately please themselves.

Help me, God, work through my fears and begin to please myself.

02/11/2023

The meeting of two personalities is like the contact of two chemical substances: if there is any reaction, both are transformed.
~Carl Jung

It's been said that no one comes into our lives by accident. We may have a sense that something inevitable and wonderful has occurred when we meet a true friend, mentor, or romantic partner. But just as frequently we encounter people with whom we are incompatible or who seem to threaten our sense of security or self-love.

Those people, too, offer us valuable experience. Their presence in our lives requires us to define more clearly our personal values, traditions, and boundaries. They teach us patience and tolerance and help us learn to set limits and speak our truths clearly and assertively. Those who challenge us enhance our process of development. As we express gratitude for the people in our lives today, let's include those who challenge us as well as those for whom our love flows with ease.

Today, I give thanks for all the people in my life, past and present.

02/10/2023

We need to share our problems to find our solutions.
Trying to solve a problem alone, without the benefit of the wisdom of other people, often leaves us stuck with an even worse problem. On the other hand, sharing any problem with interested, compassionate people, such as those we meet in the program, guarantees that many responses will surface. Each person will offer a unique and genuine perspective from which the best solution can be gleaned.

It's not unusual that we kept our problems to ourselves for years. Most of us were ashamed that we didn't have perfect lives; we thought most of the people we knew did. We didn't know that our secrets kept us very stuck. Now we are learning that sharing secrets with trusted others frees us from the burden of our secrets. We can make progress toward those perfect lives only if we tell who we really are and what is really going on. What surprises have been in store for us since we joined the program!

Telling a trusted friend about a problem will make this day more productive. And the problem may get solved too!

02/09/2023

Reflection for the Day
Among the many gifts that we are offered in recovery is the gift of freedom. Paradoxically, however, the gift of freedom is not without a price tag; freedom can only be achieved by paying the price called acceptance. Similarly, if we can surrender to our Higher Power, it will cost us our selfish focus - a "commodity" so precious to those of us who have always thought we could and should run the show. Is my freedom today worth the price tag of acceptance?

Today I Pray
May my Higher Power teach me acceptance - the ability to accept the things I cannot change - and also grant me courage to change those things I can. I ask my Higher Power for help in accepting my disease - addiction - and to give me the courage to change my addictive behavior.

Today I Will Remember
Accept the addiction. Change the behavior.

02/08/2023

Walking the Path Together
When my sponsor died after a heart transplant, I found another guy I really liked. He was a military warrant officer with about four years' sobriety. I barely had a year. We started going to daily meetings and did a formal Step study together - the best thing I've ever done.

We were best friends for thirty-four years, until he died. When I retired from the military, I went to work for the government and was able to hire him. We'd ride to work and have a meeting on the way. What a man. I used to tell him, "You know, every man is my teacher. Some teach me what to do. You've taught me a lot about what not to do."

He used to tell me, "You know, the deal works, but not all the dealers do. Not all the people in the program work the program." He worked the program each and every day. We knew everything about each other, and the hardest thing I ever had to do was to bury that sponsor after thirty-four years. But I'm so thankful that his lessons live on.

Today I treasure those friends, past and present, I've met on the road to recovery.

~Mike F., U.S. Navy, 1959–1965/1972–1990

02/07/2023

Avoiding compulsiveness
Being compulsive people, once we leave the alcohol and other drugs behind, we want our dreams fulfilled now. But when we first get into recovery, all we have is potential. Fulfillment is not realized immediately; rather it is something we work toward.

Each day we must work on our lives with what we know today. Gradually we will grow closer toward our ideal. (Recovery is a process.) But we won't get anywhere if we try forcing ourselves into situations we are not ready for. Our Higher Power sets the pace.

Have I stopped being compulsive?

Higher Power, I pray for the patience to live today with what I have and what I know.

I will avoid being compulsive today by…