Rollin Dubois, 335 George Street, Ste 4 PMP 1009, New Brunswick, NJ (2025)

03/11/2022

Spring is almost here!

Growing up a part of my life in a tropical country, I never paid attention to the seasons. The plants, the flowers are always there, beautifully looking at me. It's only away from my country of origin that I start noticing winter's scary and dead nature. The change of environment had made me appreciate all seasons, particularly spring. I want to stay in the garden to admire the flowers, plant the seed, and watch them grow in the spring.

Ironically, when I was little, I wouldn't say I liked gardening much. I preferred to play outside with my friends. My mom kind of influenced my attachment to nature by asking me to rearrange her flowers, to transfer them from a small pot to a bigger one or directly on the ground. And later, I discover that spending time in the garden has been my favorite way to decompress.
I love gardening. My mom taught me to tear up strips of old sheets to shore up the tomato plants; I guess that was the same way her mom taught her. After digging a hole, I carefully touched the tree seedlings then gently pressed the soil over their roots. She never tells me more about her childhood experience.
Until now, gardening always has had centers and calms me. When I am excited over fragile blossoms, my spotlight on something natural somehow fades my anxieties and frustration. As Luther Burbank said: " Flowers always make people better, happier, and more helpful; they are sunshine, food, and medicine for the soul."
Every morning, I start my day with a cup of coffee or tea and knock around my indoor garden or the backyard to clear my mind before heading to work.
Do you like spring? Is gardening as some effects on you? If yes, what are they? And finally, What is your favorite way to decompress?

02/26/2022

How Yoga helped me get more energy and a brighter mood

As you may know, Yoga offers tremendous physical and mental health for people of all ages. The first time that I tried Yoga, it was just for fun and the pleasure of practicing something not too familiar and different. I remember feeling more relaxed after each practice. But I felt the difference and started to taste its benefits after my divorce, particularly during my depression. It was a significant shift for me, a moving backward. It was also like I was becoming a child. Staying in the house every day with my parents wasn't too easy. I often wish the situation was different, but I was depressed and needed time to heal, rediscover myself and find my new purpose in life.
I had to accept the current situation and let go of my expectations of how things should be. Negative thoughts still come and go, but my goal was to be aware of them and release them without affection or judgment. For me, taking time to breathe is the pillar to staying present and stepping outside of those negative and racing thoughts. Notoctant, the benefits of breathing; I start each day with a deep breathing exercise. When stress or anxiety arises, I surrender myself to the healing power of the breath. Besides many difficulties and time restrictions, I prioritize self-care, which has improved my self-worth and enhanced my time with my family. Reflecting on it, Yoga which started as another fun activity, has proved to be my caretaker. Each time I hit the mat, I point out that I can handle anything that comes my way in life.
How do you handle your stress? And are you practicing Yoga or other activity that could improve your strength, balance, and flexibility? Please share with us.

02/21/2022

A play with color for calm
I sometimes play with color to alleviate my stress and discomfort. Painting has always been a way for me to express color and express my emotions. Although I know the benefits of painting, I did not touch my brush and have had fun with the color for the last couple of years. It feels like I did not take my medicine for a severe illness. Working long hours and taking care of my son left me no time for myself. Today, I am reconsidering everything because I need to make time for myself, find calm, achieve balance and be happier every single minute, hour, and every day. It's so rewarding when finishing a painting.
I hate making a mistake; when I am teaching, working on my "home brewery," and painting. Are you the same way? I don't know. I wanted all my efforts to be perfect. But, I am learning now; if they are not, I will chill about it because I want my mistake to become opportunities to learn and grow. It didn't matter to me now. My path to success doesn't have to be a straight line. What matters is to get there be successful. I think that this approach can apply to anything. Painting every day is my best job ever; I needed it. It fed my soul and spirit.; It calmed me. So I want to listen to my impulses. Try things that my rational mind avoided; find solace and calm in my studio. Maybe, I will perform at a higher-level skill that will be invaluable shortly. Are you having difficulty finding time for yourself? What are your challenges? And you plan to surmount them? Or how you surmount them?

02/14/2022

Happy Valentine's Day!

It's Valentine's Day today. I wanted to let you know that I love you. You are on that page because you are mindful.
You decided to do something most people don't do at some point. With nobody forcing you, you took an important step to be present and live life to the fullness.
Whether you've started being mindful or not, I am proud of you. Most people spend their lives saying they want to achieve goals but do nothing about them. Today, I want to invite you to reward yourself or reward yourself and your partner by doing something together. Taking your partner out for dinner or offering a gift is nice, but doing something together is not only memorable, but it is experiencing happiness. Did you ever do something with your partner or significant other? If not, try an indoor or outdoor activity and share your experience with us.

02/12/2022

Other things that I do in the morning
As soon as I get up, I like to take a cold shower. Although it was a quick shower, I took time to notice the sound and the temperature of the water, the smell and the feeling of the soap on my body. It makes me feel awake because I enjoy the cascade of the water on my body. Right after my shower, I dress for success, ready for any new opportunities that knock on my door. I don't eat breakfast in the morning, but I sit at the kitchen table surrounded by 8 to 10 flowers. I found that the indoor plants have a calming effect on me. Sometimes, I feel a strange connection with the plant, particularly when I water them. The smell of the sand tells me that we belong together.
I am working on spending a few minutes checking in with my family. I leave to work, and if time allows, maybe we can share our intentions for the day and how we want to feel.
Finally, I take the same road every day, which helps me concentrate better and helps me save my cognitive ability for later.
How is your morning routine? Did you spend some time with your family before going to work? Tell me more!

01/29/2022

Developing good habits
Thinking about habits brought me to my toddler and adolescent time. My dad always woke me up at 5:00 in the morning. He associates his thought with nature; he said that the sun most likely rise at 6:00, and the rooster start singing at the same, both telling us that it's time to work. My work was studying, reading, going to school, and having a good grade. After a while, getting up early in the morning wasn't a problem. I didn't need the help of a person or an alarm to get up. Studying in the morning was the best time to understand the topic and prepare for my exam fully. Indeed, how you start your morning sets the tone for the whole day. If I am writing or painting, I have my best work in the morning. I could use my time wisely and be productive for a long time. Lately, I have been struggling to wake early and find time to work on myself or a project. I know I need a reboot, but I don't know how to start. I am facing a couple of challenges; the first one is my job, the job is one hour from home, and I start teaching at 7:30 am at the high school. It took me another hour or more to drive back home, and tired or not; I had to take my son to either his basketball practice or classes. Once home, I prep for the next day and work a little on my brewery project. These activities left me with little time to work on myself or personal or spiritual growth.
My solution to creating more time for myself is building my business, replacing or doubling my income, and quick my teaching job. I daydream for the day to have my good habits back and to not only feel better but to be more productive in my business, at home, and in all places that matter to my family and me.
For the past three years, I have managed to wake up a few minutes early to practice mindfulness and yoga. 3 to 5 hours of sleep a day is not much for me, but getting up a little early allowed me to be present at the moment and to be grateful for my health, wealth, my country, family, and friends. Slowly, I am conquering my challenges, and the possibilities for success are endless.
So I encourage you to take five minutes at least in your morning routine and to do some deep breathing exercises. Your body and mind will thank you.
Finally, I have a quick question for you. Have you ever wanted to shake up your routine? Did you encounter some challenges? Were you able to overcome them?

01/22/2022

The power of affirmations

In my first year in college, I discovered a book by Dr. Joseph Murphy that would completely change my life. The book title was " Dans la voie Spirituelle". I never was a negative person; I had dreams that I tried to materialize like many people. But I felt something new growing in me. I felt and saw things in a better perspective when I started to look at myself in the mirror and repeat those positive words aloud: " Je Suis intègre, fort, puissant, aimant, intelligent et en bonne santé." Which means: I am honest, strong, powerful, loving, intelligent and healthy. These affirmations help purify my thoughts and reconstruct the dynamic of my brain. Since that, I have believed that nothing is impossible for me if I transfer my thoughts into words and my words into action. Words are powerful and empowering.
I remember one time, I was transitioning from being a counselor to being a teacher, and I worked as a substitute teacher at a Middle school in East Orange. My supervisor or the principal of the school, Mr. Vincent Stalling, has a habit of doing some long lectures every morning, and in his speeches, he always has some words of affirmation to his students. Voluntary or not, Mr. Stalling's affirmations words restructure the student's thoughts pattern and reprogram their subconscious mind. Some of the students did not pay attention and didn't care, but a few did. Then after a few months, I noticed some change of behavior in those students. They were less likely to get upset or react aggressively, they were completing their assignments more often, and their grades had significantly improved.
What we believe about ourselves subconsciously is indeed a dominant thing. It transforms our behaviors, relationships, and how we experience the world and our place in it. Those students learned how to think differently about themselves. You can do the same by changing any negative thought to a positive one. Every time you feel a certain way about yourself, you affirm who you are. You could think that I am not good enough; I am black, poor, and not bright.
The negative thought makes you feel incapable of handling what life throws at you, and you should change that thought by a positive one like I'm going to figure this out, I am going to double my income next year. Nothing can stop me, and nothing can stop you! We are the architect of our life; we build the foundation and choose its contents.
Are you a negative person? Do you know that you are what you thought? Are you willing to relinquish your fears, purge your anger, foresee your future and live up to your potential?

01/20/2022

Many ways to be mindful

One can introduce mindfulness in most of their daily activity. The main thing is not to close your eyes and to do deep breathing, but to be in the here and now. For example, we are Washing our hands. Since Covid-19 hit us, we wash our hands more often than usual; this could be an excellent opportunity to be in the present as soon as you walk to the sink and turn on the water. Noticing the temperature, is it warm enough or too cold. How the water makes you feel, what sensation you have while applying the soap, and about rubbing your hands together and lathering up, take notice of the action of rinsing your hands, watching the soap go away, and finally gently drying them. All the processes give you the time to ground at the moment.
Eating can bring you the opportunity to be mindful, but you must put all devices away. Food has been an essential part of my culture; we have a special meal for mostly each occasion. I love the smell, the color, the textures, the flavor, and the spicy taste of those special meals. You can imagine that I enjoy eating; I like the sensations of chewing and swallowing the food. I take the time also to be grateful to the farmer who grows the plant and harvests the fruits, vegetables, and herbs. Also, I am thankful for the drivers who carry the food to the store. And finally, I am grateful to the person who bought the items and took the time to prepare an incredible meal.
Another way I incorporate mindfulness into my daily routine is by going for a walk. The preparation of changing my clothes, putting on my sneakers, or dressing appropriately for the weather brings me to the present. This time, I breathe in and out, observe nature, and pay attention to the smell, sights, and sounds of the birds I encounter while walking.
I also try to be present when speaking with others or listening to them instead of verbalizing my response when they finish. I like to concentrate on what I say to let my mind float and catch up in reciprocal thoughts or emotions. I learned the skills in counseling school; it's a bit challenging to do; however, there is merit to try. Your better communication skills and relationships will thank you.
I give you a few examples of how you can be mindful of your daily routine; I believe you can be present in everything you are doing. New habits take time to develop. Besides, it would help if you were gentle with yourself to be gentle with others. Did you have a mindful moment today? What did you do to stay in the present? Don't forget to share your experience.

Rollin Dubois

03/11/2022

02/26/2022

02/21/2022

02/14/2022

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01/29/2022

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