Terri Bacow’s Private Practice, New York, NY (2025)

10/30/2025

Are you an eldest daughter? This is not a diagnosis, but a social/cultural term with many elements of truth to it! Psychological research on birth order does support that the greatest resources (and pressure) are directed at the first born.

I was pleased to discuss this in with journalist . Many people who are the oldest daughter in their families report feeling “seen” by the term, and it is wonderful when your feelings are validated.

As an anxiety specialist, I help a lot of folks with high functioning anxiety which some eldest daughters report having due to the expectations they feel they need to meet. It is helpful to remember that perfectionism can make anxiety stronger and modifying standards can be liberating.

Send this to someone you know who can relate! Taylor would approve!

10/03/2025

When it comes to anxiety, no one likes being uncomfortable! We try to manage our fear of being uncomfortable in a particular situation by avoiding that situation or person. This is understandable!

However, if the worst that happens to you in any given circumstance is that you might be uncomfortable, is that really so bad?

Discomfort is temporary! And, you are no stranger to it! It is helpful to remind yourself that you have been uncomfortable before, and you have gotten through it and then have promptly forgotten all about it. Tolerating discomfort builds strength and resilience.

Coping statements can give you a quick boost of courage. They are wonderful reminders you can keep in your pocket. Elsa from Frozen had the best one when she said, “The cold doesn’t bother me anyway....”

Don’t let the cold bother you!! Pass it on!

09/10/2025

Sometimes we face stressful situations that we simply can’t control. In those moments, it’s worth pausing to ask: Will worrying help—or will it just make me feel worse? Most of the time, worry doesn’t add value, even if it feels like it will.

I frequently ask my clients to jump in on a pros and cons exercise with me (you can’t go wrong with a good old fashioned mini debate). If you compare the benefit of worrying against the cost(s) a clear winner will emerge. Adding worry on top of something that you can’t control definitely isn’t the strategy to go for (anyone playing in the US Open will agree - it is ALL about strategy).🎾

Share this with your favorite overthinker… they’ll thank you (eventually).

08/12/2025

Mental health stigma is so over!! I was thrilled to chat about this with the lovely host and advocate on the podcast. Our episode is out tomorrow August 13 - please be on the lookout for it!!! 🎙️🎙️

Fran is the founder of (a nonprofit promoting mental health awareness and su***de prevention) and the community (where you can practice self-acceptance and boost your motivation).

She and I had an illuminating conversation about anxiety management and CBT! In particular, we discussed how to reframe your mindset by identifying a handful of key thinking traps that you may not even realize you are engaging in.

Fran shared her own personal journey with anxiety and mental health treatment. It was amazing to connect. Stay tuned for the episode and clips of it, which I will be sharing this week!

08/08/2025

This is me! And many of us!

Anxiety and mood disorders tend to affect women at a 2:1 ratio compared to men. Girls and women are twice as likely to be diagnosed with generalized anxiety (GAD), panic disorder and specific phobias, for example.

This is due to a complex mix of biological, psychological and sociocultural reasons. Research shows that women’s brains may be more reactive in regions tied to fear and emotion regulation (e.g., the amygdala and prefrontal cortex).

Further, girls and women are more likely to ruminate (dwelling on distressing thoughts) and engage in negative self-appraisal (i.e., body dissatisfaction, self-criticism and perfectionism).

Lastly, women are quite frankly more stressed - they are frequently expected to manage caregiving, emotional labor, and household responsibilities. even when working full time. Anxiety often begins in puberty, at a moment of increasing academic and social demands.

There are other factors too (i.e. gender stigma, exposure to trauma, genetics).

The upshot? Women’s health matters, and it is no surprise that women are true superheroes. Let’s give our moms, daughters and friends more support!! And therapy always helps! Post shared from

Share this with a gal that you know and love! 💕

08/06/2025

Misinformation can be a really big problem these days!! While social media has so many advantages, one of the drawbacks is that you can encounter ideas that are false or inaccurate, especially when it comes to mental health.

For example, there are a ton of TikTok videos that suggest that certain feelings, sensations or symptoms “mean” that you have a full blown psychological disorder. This includes the misconception that “everyone” has a little bit of “something.” Further, when not posted by experts, often a suggestion will be made regarding a trick or step to improve your mental health that may be totally misguided (i.e., going for a walk is nice for mood, but it will not cure depression).

I was pleased to comment on this topic in this terrific article in written by . My aim is not to lecture (I love our IG community!) but rather to encourage folks struggling with mental health concerns to be cautious. If you think something is going on for you, the best way to get a diagnosis is to meet with a licensed mental health provider. Typically, the only way to know if you have a certain condition is if you meet very specific (DSM-V) criteria.

Above all, try to follow the accounts that really seem to know their stuff - the ones generated by the experts themselves! To read more, check out the full article (link in bio and in stories)

07/31/2025

You may be spending a lot of time fighting with your worry thoughts or trying to get them to stop. Defusing worry is a tactic in which instead of actively engaging with your worries, you detach yourself from, or “unfollow” them.

Defusion is a strategy that asks you to look at your worry thoughts simply as mental activity in your brain. Research shows that people who stop attempting suppress worry and simply mindfully observe that they are having worry thoughts feel more calm. In this strategy, the content of the worry is totally irrelevant :)

To defuse your worry, view your thoughts from a distance, nonjudgmentally and with curiosity. Mindfully identify your worries, and fill the blanks of the following statements (or what I like to call, “therapy mad libs”):

I am having the thought that_____________.
I am having the belief that______________.
My anxiety is telling me that_____________.
My brain is suggesting the idea that_________.

Pick your favorite, try it, and see what a difference it makes!!

07/29/2025

Hear me out! This is not a post involving toxic positivity. Worry is generally fretful and unpleasant!!

Worry, in particular, pulls our minds exclusively towards the negative and convinces us we are unable to cope. Psychologists call this a negative attribution bias. It actually has evolutionary components so our bodies will attend to threat. However, often the situation we are afraid of isn’t objectively that threatening.

🩶It can be super helpful to mindfully shift your attention away from the negative and try to view the situation neutrally and even (gasp!) positively.

🩶For example, perhaps the situation you are worrying about presents a challenge or an opportunity for growth. Perhaps getting through it will bring you great benefits! (Passing board exams for example will earn you a degree, going on a date might lead to a new relationship).

🩶And perhaps, the situation just isn’t that bad. Be mindful of the upside. What are some aspects of the problem that aren’t so terrible? For example, some things are a “good” problem to have (i.e. your bathtub is broken but you live in a really nice house, your kids are going away but this will give you a break).

Can you think of silver linings to a worrisome situation? Comment below!

07/24/2025

It was wonderful to catch up with in NYC! She is a former behavioral science professor and mental health advocate. We have so many things in common (and both joined Instagram in April 2020 - what timing!)

In particular, Lindsay and I are aligned on helping people with anxiety find therapy that is evidence-based, effective and helpful. You do not have to suffer!

It is simply wonderful when colleagues become friends and vice versa, and when support can be found in a community such as ours.

Thanks to Lindsay for sharing her stories with me and for posting this fabulous selfie of us!

Have you made new connections via IG? Whom do you count on for support? Comment below!

07/22/2025

Anticipation is a beast! A huge part of worry is anticipating a future event and predicting it is going to be really uncomfortable or turn out badly. Many of us get stuck in this phase and it is incredibly time consuming and fretful 🥺😩

Inevitably, however, the situation is NEVER as bad as you think it is going to be. Whatever you’re spiraling about (a speech, a presentation, a trip, a first date) almost always turns out better than you predict, which brings a huge sense of relief.😮‍💨

Why then spend so much time in Anticipation Land? We almost can’t help ourselves and somehow think worrying about it is going to influence the outcome.

One way to fight back against anxiety is to reflect on past experiences. Think of times you’ve been suuuuper nervous about something and it turned out much better than you thought (probably too many too count).

This is because anticipation is always worse than reality! Anticipation is indeed the worst part, and I frequently remind my clients that this is the case.

Does this sound familiar? Do you frequently get snared in a web of anticipation? Comment below!

07/15/2025

Happy Bastille Day! (France’s Independence Day) (Just one day late - it’s 7/14 or 14 Juillet!) I took French for eight years when I was younger so this was an immediate save for me. 🥖🥖🥖

As amusing as the post is, panic attacks are no joke - if you have ever experienced one, you can relate! Even though they are a manifestation of truly harmless anxiety and cannot hurt you, they can feel quite awful.

There are many ways to cope - breathing, grounding, reframing, mindful distraction. Please also add a dose of self-compassion! As you breathe through it, have kindness for yourself. Tell yourself that this is really hard and that’s okay! (and it won’t last forever).

The best way to gain independence and freedom from panic attacks is to use CBT strategies. And that is cause for celebration! 🇫🇷🇺🇸

07/08/2025

Ever wonder how long you should be in therapy for? When prospective clients ask me this, I explain that it always of course depends - BUT that CBT therapy is known for being short-term and thus cost effective.

Many anxiety disorders, for example, can be treated in 6-8 to 12 weeks. Sometimes folks will see me for just a handful of sessions for something like public speaking anxiety and feel better quite quickly.

CBT, of course, works for conditions other than anxiety - and I always incorporate the skills and ideas into my work, helping clients with relationships, self-esteem, low mood, eating concerns and life transitions. Often, a handful of sessions will do the trick (with many folks wanting to stick around longer since therapy is so rewarding and cathartic!)

I was pleased to chat about this topic in this article I was interviewed for. If you are interested in short-term therapy or CBT therapy in NY or know someone who does, feel free to reach out to me. Link in bio.

Terri Bacow’s Private Practice

10/30/2025

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