Soul Food Counseling- SFC

Soul Food Counseling- SFC Individual, Family, Couple counseling. MMTIC Certified, MBTI

In an increasingly competitive job market it really helps to know your strengths and areas for growth. Consider an MBTI ...
04/15/2015

In an increasingly competitive job market it really helps to know your strengths and areas for growth. Consider an MBTI workshop!

More companies use assessments to hire, with fewer willing to take a chance on anyone who doesn’t measure up.

With every end there comes a brand new beginning.
04/12/2015

With every end there comes a brand new beginning.

04/12/2015

Life is all about timing and one can resist the signs that it is time to do something different for only so long. So, that being said, as of June 1, 2015, I am going to limit my practice to workshops, private MBTI consultations and consulting only. I am no longer going to take private counseling clients. I have loved my time in private practice and have been totally blessed with the most awesome clients on the planet, however, as life changes so must the nature of my practice. All gratitude to those who have brought so much color and texture to my life and hoping to see folks at workshops.

04/04/2015

What can the MBTI do for you? Contact me about individual sessions or workshops.

03/30/2015

Do These Genes Make Me Look Fat?

Standing in line at the grocery store perusing the tabloid fare is always amusing. One can catch up on any impending alien invasion, farm animals born with three heads, the coming of Satan, or the latest travails of Lindsay Lohan within five minutes. The other day, however, there was an article that struck fear into my heart and in my great sense of knowing the hearts of almost every woman alive.

Transcending the global chaos and national portents of doom there it was staring me right in the face. All the rich and famous regaled in swimsuit splendor and/or shame. Having breezed by the all too cliché New Years resolution to lose weight and mindlessly blasting past Super Bowl Sunday there it was the impending doom that is swimsuit season.

Every year my expectations related to this annual trauma keep getting lower. Presently, I will settle for something that doesn’t get me harpooned at the beach. How did I come to this? The nibbles of this and bites of that have insidiously resulted in a total body revolt leaving me to wish there were some pill or perhaps ritual that would magically melt the weight away? Was I being plagued with bad Karma? Or, better yet, bad genes that ultimately doomed me to eventual obesity? A good start to answering these questions was to look at the contents of my shopping cart where I saw an assemblage of confectionaries, enriched sugar products, carbohydrates, with a few veggies scattered recklessly about as if added as an afterthought. From there I pondered the collective gloom settling over the country mixed with a particularly nasty winter as not being conducive to reducing those dopamine elevating food choices. No doubt, those who were able to avoid mass evacuations of their domiciles found themselves housebound hardly able to burn off those Christmas confections and Big Macs. No doubt about it, we are becoming a society plagued by obesity. With abundant sources of fat producing foods and very sedentary habits this is a trend that will handicap our hopes of maintaining optimum health in a milieu where health care resources are becoming premium. So, there is no time like the present to start restricting that caloric intake and gear up the exercise regimes to combat our ever-increasing girth

There is some good news in America’s growing population. The Center For Disease Control (CDC) report for 2010 reveals that obesity in America has seemed to plateau remaining consistent over the past five years .for men and ten years for women and children indicating that obesity may be leveling off. The bad news is that those numbers are staggering with nearly 34 percent of adults being obese, more than double the percentage 30 years ago. The number of obese children tripled during that time to 17 percent. Additionally, 68 percent of adults and nearly one-third of children are considered at least overweight, with a body mass index of 25 or higher. So while leveling off we are still a nation that is paying for years of indulgent eating and sedentary behavior.

Looking at obesity rates among populations we find that African-American adults have the highest rates with 37 percent among men and nearly 50 percent in women. Among Hispanic women; 43 percent are obese with Hispanic and Black children having higher obesity rates than non-Hispanic whites. Some professionals believe that this ‘leveling off’ could be due to those who are genetically or psychologically susceptible having already becoming obese. When one looks at the statistics some questions arise. Do our genes make us fat? Are we genetically doomed to become obese? Or, is obesity a result of environment or parental modeling unhealthy lifestyles to their children? The age old nature vs nurture applies and the answer is probably both.

The 1960’s heralded the theory that genes were responsible for metabolism to be lower in some causing them to easily gain weight that was difficult to lose. These ‘cautious genes’ were believed to sustain our ancestors in times of famine by storing fat. There was a lot of excitement generated with the discovery of Leptin, which is a protein hormone that plays a key role in the regulation of energy intake and the expenditure of energy to include appetite and metabolism. Leptin sends signals to the brain letting it know that the body has had enough to eat. There is a small population who posses a homozygous mutation of the Leptin gene that leads to a constant desire for food, which does result in morbid obesity, however, this is very rare. So, if that is the case why don’t we just give obese people Leptin? Well, clinical studies using a recombinant human Leptin were inconclusive for a myriad of reasons. Not the least of which included large and frequent doses of the hormone producing only modest results.

More recently the discovery of CRTC3 that has been linked to slower metabolic rates and weight gain is exciting. Interestingly, Hispanic populations appear to have a more potent form of this gene making them more susceptible to stubborn weight gain. Whites did not have this presentation of the gene. As research continues drug companies are avidly trying to produce an effective pill to combat obesity and CRTC3 appears promising. Looking at statistics regarding obesity in various populations one is likely to conclude that there is at least some genetic causation, however, that cannot be proven as there are so many variables to consider. While there are indications that some do have a genetic basis for their obesity much of the problem is likely to exist in economic factors limiting food choices, attitudes, parental modeling, and cultural mores.

The business of losing weight is a mulit billion dollar industry and the choices of diets seemingly endless. Weight loss products vary in style and price often prancing out underwear models and celebrities to hawk their product’s success. Problem is those celebrities and such are provided the product and are paid to focus on the outcome. Most of the viewing world however, have limits on their time, energy, and resources and can find the price of these wares to be prohibitive and anybody who has ever read the fine print underneath the image of a well coifed and dressed model is aware that the ‘results are not typical.’ What it really comes down to is the battleground of weight is won or lost within the mind. There are obviously extraneous factors like age and metabolic rate but the ability to lose weight comes down to determination and hard work. Wish that weren’t the case but I don’t make the rules. Any diet can work when the attitude is positive and reasonable goals set. Weight gain and/or loss is a very complex process including consideration of genetics, environment, cultural beliefs, parental attitudes, and support networks. There is no one size fits all or a pill that can magically remove fat and all the bells and whistles that result from obesity but everyone agrees that success is in limiting caloric intake and increasing metabolic rate. The old eat less and move around more is the solution to which all experts agree. Some people seek surgical intervention to ‘cure’ their morbid obesity, which may make sense, but it is not without significant risks and the rate of failure is staggeringly high when the weight being a symptom is addressed ignoring the source. Surgical intervention is more promising when it is combined with talk therapy and self-discovery.

The key to losing weight is the attitude that one will adhere to a diet and the choice to get rid of those excess pounds no matter what. Finding a diet plan that fits your lifestyle and budget is important. Setting realistic goals for weight loss is essential as it is so easy to become disappointed and mentally fatigued by deprivation without tangible results. Having a support network is very helpful. There are as many ways to sabotage weight loss efforts as there are ways to lose weight so be aware of the pitfalls. It does appear that genetics can play a role in weight patterns, however, anyone can lose weight when the will to do so exists. In doing so we can avoid other genetic prognosticators like high blood pressure, stroke, hyperlipidemia, stroke, and even heart disease.

When it comes to exercise I like to ascribe to the Mark Twain approach, which goes something like ‘whenever I feel the urge to exercise I lay down until the urge passes.’ That being said weight loss is more effective when exercise is implemented. Even if you can’t stand the thought of going to the gym or running down the street in t-shirt and gym shorts it is easy to add steps into everyday life. Things like using stairs instead of elevators, parking far away from the grocery store, taking the pet pooch out for a walk, turning off that TV and all other electronic distractions are all beneficial. Small things can result in huge differences and are worth the effort. If you are one of the folks who are likely to have trouble losing weight first and foremost be patient. Remember those pounds did not aggregate overnight. It is important to be kind to yourself in setting goals. If you have a large amount of weight to lose it is important to include your health care provider especially if your plans include an advertised weight loss plan that includes the administration of any drug or chemical.

Obviously, I am a proponent of therapy. It is valuable to have professional support when making big life transitions. Understand that large weight loss IS a big change that not only affects you but all the people in your world. Ideal weight loss strategies involve commitment to lifestyle modification understanding that one can enjoy all foods in moderation and not have to endure continuous deprivation. Long-term weight loss is a result of understanding and changing patterns of behavior(s) that produced the problem. Assuming a role in the responsibility for maintaining optimum health is empowering and necessary in these days of diminishing resources. The determination to lose those pounds is perhaps the healthiest decision one can make that will enhance a positive self-image, and increase overall well-being. There truly is nothing better than looking and feeling good. Take the steps necessary and focus on a positive outcome. So, for this year don’t worry so much about what you are going to eat over the holiday season. Be concerned with what you are consuming between now and then. Good luck and bon appetite!

03/30/2015

Why do therapists hesitate to venture into the realm of the spirit? Are we so steeped in theory and DSM diagnoses that we are afraid to venture into dark depressions or mood disorders sans medicines and official labels? Of course, there are cases where medications do provide a quality of life that would not otherwise be possible without the use of chemotherapeutic agents, however, what are we compromising by numbing the brain with drugs? How much creativity, innovation and/or potential no matter how big or small are being lost? When we can tap into the wonder that is the soul's calling and delve into the spiritual world, what opportunities might open up for the client and therapist alike? Isn't it, at least, worth a try?

The spiritual dimension is the playground for self-discovery where expectations and attitudinal perspectives can be assessed and modified creating a sense of unspeakable peace and wisdom. It is a place of exploration where the broken heart, vulnerable to the spiritual calling can venture into uncharted terrain safely. The practitioner's responsibility is to create a therapeutic milieu free from judgment, the tyranny of fear, and a binary mindset. All of which create a veritable minefield of iatrogenic potential. Much like a small child explores the tangible world, those introduced into the spirit realm must have the freedom and safety to weather the scrapes, bumps, and bruises with the security of knowing there is a meaningful outcome to be discovered. Understanding the possibilities of what can be gained is worth weighing against the benefits of choosing drugs that are not completely understood especially in the area of long term effects. As a therapist, I am willing to consider the unlimited possibilities of exploring the spiritual/divine open to the possibility that resistance or instability can change the playing field dramatically. When seeking a therapist ask the questions about options and strongly consider the unique strengths and beauty you contribute to the world without the distraction of medicines. There is no right or wrong answers simply possibilities and opportunities. Life is short, enjoy the journey and try not to miss a minute of it. Suck the marrow out life and choose wisely. My wish for each and every soul that journeys into my practice is to find the path that brings them the greatest satisfaction and balance. Godspeed and choose wisely!

03/30/2015

If you want your children to be intelligent, read them fairy tales. If you want them to be more intelligent, read them more fairy tales.”
― Albert Einstein

03/29/2015

Kudos to my friend and colleague Sue Robinson and her staff for putting on an amazing workshop at Hardin Simmons today! The presenters were fabulous. Everything went perfectly, great content, lots of smart, savvy people. Overall, a great day and I am so impressed that Abilene has such great opportunities and truly talented folks who are now and will be servicing the community.

02/15/2015

Whoever fights monsters should see to it that in the process he does not become a monster. And if you gaze long enough into an abyss, the abyss will gaze back into you. ~Friedrich Nietzsche~

07/31/2014

Friday inspiration from a great

07/29/2014

I find myself telling people I am not a life coach ... a lot. I consider it my job, no... it is a sacred quest to guide them toward making healthy decisions for the lives they will be living when they walk out of my office. People do possess their own answers and the ability to heal. It takes time, insight and effort to find their truths and realize their potential and when they do there is no amount of words that can describe the satisfaction they experience. All too often the answers are unpalatable so folks keep reframing the question hoping for a solution that is easier and less painful to effectuate which can lead to them getting 'stuck' and not progressing. The healing process takes time and I wish, like so many, that there were a pill or other magical conjuring that could make suffering go away, however, there is much to be learned from the dark places life takes us and avoidance only serves to metaphorically kick it down the road where face it we will, face it we must. It is so challenging to inspire, encourage, query, support, empathize and walk with another soul, for a time, knowing that I am in their life for a season with the greatest indicator of success lying in that bittersweet parting that results from the courage and dedication of the client to improve their circumstances and get back on their journey.

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