11/19/2025
Why Coaching Sometimes Works Better
(But also….why it sometimes doesn’t.)
Ever find yourself investing in coaching, the newest app, a new program that will “change everything,” yet you still find yourself falling back into your old patterns at some point?
If you’ve done all the right things and still feel stuck…
the problem might not be your strategy.
It might be your subconscious wiring.
Here’s what most people don’t realize 👇
🧠 Coaching works when:
- Your goals are clear
- Your emotional wiring isn’t actively working against you
- You’re building forward from a stable foundation
⚠️ Coaching might fall flat when:
- Subconscious beliefs from childhood still shape how you respond to pressure, failure, or slowing down
- You “know what to do” but freeze, panic, or self-sabotage anyway
- You keep looping through burnout, even with new tools
This isn’t about one being better.
It’s about knowing what you actually need, and when.
Coaching helps you optimize.
Therapy helps you understand what’s quietly running the show behind the optimization.
If beliefs like:
“I have to be responsible for everything.”
“If I say no, I’ll disappoint everyone.”
“I only feel valuable when I’m being useful or helpful.”
“My needs don’t matter”
are still running in the background, coaching may inadvertently reinforce those beliefs, especially if you tend to be a high-achieving over-functioner.
So, before you sign up for another program or accountability group, ask:
“Am I trying to fix a performance issue….or am I avoiding something I don’t fully understand yet?”
I go deeper into this in my new blog and video: https://www.catharticspacecounseling.com/blog
🖤 If this hits home, my book Unpacked goes deeper into how those childhood roles (helper, fixer, peacekeeper) quietly shape our adult lives, and how to shift them without blowing up your life.
👉 https://www.kristen-jacobsen.com/unpackedbook
