12/20/2024
One week ago today, sister.. en el dia de La Virgen.. on 12-12..
it’s no secret my sister and I were not close, I swear sometimes she did everything in her power to push people away. When she got diagnosed with cancer though it became a new beginning. Not because she changed lol but because it didn’t matter anymore and honestly it hadn’t mattered for a long time. By the end I was begging to have some kind of glimpse of her sassiness back. “Talk your s**t, sister. Be rude to me one more time!” I’ll take her however she is, HAPPILY.. that’s what I learned 💔
She never wanted anyone sharing her journey or talking about what she was going through. And that’s understandable ❤️ But also incredibly isolating. And not just for her.. I haven’t wanted to post much in the last few years because it didn’t feel genuine. There was this huge invisible elephant in the room that I couldn’t point out to anyone. I would read people’s posts about petty things and couldn’t bare the injustice. “At least you have your health!” I would think.
That woman fought hard.. for almost 5 years.. surgery after surgery. Radiation after radiation. Chemo and then more chemo. When she left us it was the biggest heartbreak of my life. No man could ever come close to hurting me like this hurt me. Genetics are a powerful thing to share with someone ❤️ I definitely underestimated our bond. It literally feels like a piece of me is missing.. but I see her in the mirror and it makes me cry, out of sadness AND joy. Hug your loved ones tight, tell them you love them.
I wish my sister knew, like REALLY knew, that she was the pretty one.
That she WAS loved.
That she mattered.
To so many people.
And I wish she believed that people would forgive her if she asked for it.
I’ll take you with me everywhere I go, sister ❤️ You taught me how to love my enemies, how to love people for who they are. and that life is short. I’ll miss you forever Ruby…