02/23/2026
1: Keep dating a guy who’s “unsure, slow, in therapy for it, trying, doesn’t know, not there yet.” I leave immediately. I don’t let anyone string me along and I do not get strung along, ever. I may be sad but dating, never waiting.
2: Explain standards. I just don’t date you.
3: Think there’s not enough good single men left. That leaks desperate energy and you’ll be trying to make it work with guys when that’s their job.
4: Text him first, check in with him, plan, or pay or say feelings first. If you take away his manliness you’ll be dating a bamboozler or a desperate guy - a caliber guy will walk away.
5: Romanticizing red flags because he’s “busy.” I don’t waste time, nothing clever happening there.
I’m sharing this because I get questions on how did I “find him” and I just need you to know that I didn’t.
Dating-for-a-relationship I only ever did (and still do) 2 things:
1. Never pursue or entertain subpar or shrink myself.
2. Align my energy with what I want.
That’s it.
Everything else is not going to get princess treatment.
In the beginning, I got fake asked out, ditched and ab*sed. I had very few boyfriends and nobody from my city would date me. So I do get it.
You can start leveraging your own energy in really small baby steps.
I started by asking what I wanted and what about that was scary. I think it took an hour or 2, so not much.
But I very intentionally flirted with guys online and off. And I just kept doing that with small energy work a few times a week and here we are. 💍
If you’re still in the trenches,
