Center for Growth and Connection

Center for Growth and Connection Helping individuals and couples in CA, VA, and DC who need someone to show them a different way forward.

Michelle Market, LPC, has more than 15 years in the counseling field. She specializes in treating eating disorders and trauma recovery. Michelle is a Certified Eating Disorder Specialist and is certified in EMDR. To contact Michelle Market, you can email her at mmarketlpc@gmail.com or call 703-597-7869. Michelle Cantrell, M.Ed., is a Resident in Counseling working towards licensure in the state of Virginia. Michelle's areas of speciality are eating disorders, trauma, low self-esteem, and unhealthy relationship patterns. To contact Michelle, you can email her at mdc@michellecantrell.com or call 571-969-4393.

It doesn’t always happen in big, dramatic ways.�Sometimes we lose ourselves one small compromise at a time.A need we don...
11/10/2025

It doesn’t always happen in big, dramatic ways.�
Sometimes we lose ourselves one small compromise at a time.
A need we don’t voice.�A truth we hold back.�A part of us we quiet to keep connection.

Many of us learned that love meant being agreeable or accommodating. Those lessons once helped us feel safe and accepted. But over time, they can leave us feeling distant from our own wants, needs, and identity.

If you’re noticing how easily you adapt, pause before judging yourself.
That pattern was learned for a reason.
And awareness is the beginning of choice.

You can love deeply and stay connected to yourself at the same time.

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Looking for support? Feel free to reach out!

📞Phone: (626) 702 - 3485
💌Email: admin@centerforgrowthandconnection.com

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If you use achievement to avoid loneliness, try this instead… #1: Replace performing with sharing.Instead of trying to i...
11/07/2025

If you use achievement to avoid loneliness, try this instead…

#1: Replace performing with sharing.

Instead of trying to impress others, try to connect with them. Over-achievers often default to proving their worth by being competent, helpful, or accomplished.

☝️Try this: When a friend asks how you are, resist the urge to say “busy but good.” Try sharing something small and real, like “Honestly, I’ve been feeling disconnected lately.”

#2: Create connection goals, not just career goals.

If all your goals live in the realm of productivity, connection will always come last.

☝️Try this: Schedule weekly “connection time” like you would a work meeting. Call a friend, join a class, or just be around people without a task attached. Set a relational goal, like “Have one conversation this week where I share something personal.”

#3: Notice what you feel when you stop achieving.

Stillness can bring up sadness, fear, or loneliness you’ve been avoiding by staying busy.

☝️Try this: The next time you finish a big task, don’t immediately start another one. Sit for a few minutes and ask, “What’s here right now?” If emotions arise, let them – without judgment. Journal or voice note what you feel before distracting yourself again.

Looking for support? Feel free to reach out!
📞Phone: (626) 702 - 3485
💌Email: admin@centerforgrowthandconnection.com

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11/05/2025

You can’t hustle your way into feeling loved.

Many high-achieving people learned early that success meant safety – that doing more was how you stayed connected, seen, or valued.

But no amount of “doing” can meet your need for “being.”

Real balance comes when you slow down enough to enjoy the life you’ve worked so hard to build.

⬇️Save this if you’re learning to rest, not just achieve.

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Looking for support? Feel free to reach out!

📞Phone: (626) 702 - 3485
💌Email: admin@centerforgrowthandconnection.com

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Are you achieving lots, but still feeling lonely?➡️Swipe through to see the signs you might be using achievement to avoi...
11/03/2025

Are you achieving lots, but still feeling lonely?

➡️Swipe through to see the signs you might be using achievement to avoid real connection.

Awareness is the first step. Leave a comment if one of these hits – let’s start the conversation.

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Looking for support? Feel free to reach out!
📞Phone: (626) 702 - 3485
💌Email: admin@centerforgrowthandconnection.com

—

10/16/2025

Gorillas & Grieving Divorce: Part 3/3

When a marriage ends, there’s no meal train. No “take some time off to heal.” No rituals, no memorials. The grief is often private, “invisible”. But it’s real.

Maybe it’s time we take a cue from the gorillas: to care for those whose relationships have ended. And let’s do it with the same tenderness we give to those who’ve lost someone to death.

If you’re going through a breakup or divorce, please don’t do it alone. Ask for help. Let others care for you. You deserve to be held in your healing.

—

Looking for support? Feel free to reach out!

📞Phone: (626) 702 - 3485
💌Email: admin@centerforgrowthandconnection.com

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10/16/2025

Gorillas & Grieving Divorce: Part 2/3

When a mother gorilla loses her baby, she carries the body for days. She knows it’s gone, but her body needs time to catch up to the loss.

What happens next is incredible: in gorilla communities, grooming has hierarchy (who can groom whom). Except when a mother is grieving. Then, those rules dissolve.

The other females gather around her. They groom her. They care for her body while her heart learns to live with the loss.

We don’t have anything like that for divorce. But maybe we should.

What would it look like if we cared for people going through separation with that same tenderness?

➡️ Pt. 3: What we can learn from them.

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Looking for support? Feel free to reach
out!

📞Phone: (626) 702 - 3485
💌Email: admin@centerforgrowthandconnection.com

—

10/16/2025

Gorillas & Grieving Divorce: Part 1/3

There’s something we don’t talk about enough when we talk about divorce: grief.

When someone loses a loved one, we bring casseroles, send flowers, check in. We understand that loss needs care.

But when a marriage ends, especially after years or decades, the grief can feel just as real. Your body doesn’t know the difference. The racing heart, the sleepless nights, the disorientation – it’s the biology of attachment rupture.

Grief researcher Dr. Mary-Frances O’Connor explains it beautifully: our brains need time to update to the new reality.

➡️ Pt. 2: The story of the grieving gorilla

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Looking for support? Feel free to reach out!

📞Phone: (626) 702 - 3485
💌Email: admin@centerforgrowthandconnection.com

—

Many of us learned that needing others makes us weak. So we became self-sufficient, capable – and alone. But in love, in...
10/13/2025

Many of us learned that needing others makes us weak. So we became self-sufficient, capable – and alone. But in love, independence without connection turns into distance.

You can be strong and supported.

You can lean on each other without losing yourself.

At the Center for Growth & Connection, we help couples move from self-protection to emotional safety – rebuilding trust, closeness, and real partnership.

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Looking for support? Feel free to reach out!

📞Phone: (626) 702 - 3485
💌Email: admin@centerforgrowthandconnection.com

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What Is PISD?PISD is not yet an official diagnosis like PTSD, but it shares a lot of similarities. It’s a response to be...
10/10/2025

What Is PISD?

PISD is not yet an official diagnosis like PTSD, but it shares a lot of similarities. It’s a response to betrayal trauma: when someone you deeply trust violates that trust in an intimate way, your brain and body react as if you’ve been through a life-altering event because, well, you have.

Common Symptoms:

• Intrusive thoughts you can’t shut off
• Emotional numbness or detachment
• Anxiety, hyper-vigilance
• Mood swings & depression
• Physical symptoms like sleepless nights or body tension

You might find yourself…

• Questioning your worth.
• Reliving the betrayal.
• Feeling lost, confused, broken.
• Wondering if healing is even possible.

Ways to Start Healing:

• Let yourself grieve what’s lost
• Stop chasing external closure
• Challenge self-blame & harsh thoughts
• Set clear boundaries
• Find supportive outlets (journaling / therapy / safe people)
• Reconnect with who you are, outside the hurt

Therapy can help. We offer therapy for individuals & couples – trauma-informed, compassionate, and practical. Step by step, you can move forward and heal.

Reach out here:

📞Phone: (626) 702 - 3485
💌Email: admin@centerforgrowthandconnection.com

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A few years ago, someone shared with me a video by YouTuber Monica Hernandez that introduced to me the idea of the “chil...
10/06/2025

A few years ago, someone shared with me a video by YouTuber Monica Hernandez that introduced to me the idea of the “chill girl” – aka a girl / woman who “has no needs” (suppresses them) and “is down for whatever” (swallows her own preferences & concerns).

When you’re drawn to emotionally avoidant people, asking for anything may be labeled “needy” or “too much”. The chill girl persona is a way of coping with this – chill girls don’t ask for anything at all, at their own expense of course.

Being the “chill girl” might feel safe – even admirable. But it comes at a cost.

True intimacy doesn’t come from being easy. It comes from being real, from being seen. From trusting that your needs are not “too much.”

Have you ever caught yourself being the “chill” one in relationships? What did it cost you?

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If you’re looking for support – feel free to reach out:
📞Phone: (626) 702 - 3485
💌Email: admin@centerforgrowthandconnection.com

—

Travel removes daily distractions.What’s left? You + your partner.On a trip, you’ll face stress, spontaneity, and compro...
10/03/2025

Travel removes daily distractions.
What’s left? You + your partner.

On a trip, you’ll face stress, spontaneity, and compromise. Pay attention…

Do they get irritated at delays?
Do they dismiss your preferences?
Or…do they make you feel like you’re a team in the adventure?

Travel can reveal who someone really is, and how they show up when life isn’t easy. The way someone treats you on vacation can show you how they’ll treat you in the rest of life.

How do you and your partner handle traveling together?

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If you’re looking for support, feel free to reach out:
📞Phone: (626) 702 - 3485
💌Email: admin@centerforgrowthandconnection.com

—

We often think “growth = becoming more”. But growth is also about unbecoming: shedding behaviors, beliefs, or patterns w...
09/30/2025

We often think “growth = becoming more”. But growth is also about unbecoming: shedding behaviors, beliefs, or patterns we adopted for survival that don’t serve us anymore.

We weren’t born to be perfectionists, people pleasers, or constantly critical. We learned these to cope. But at some point, they stop protecting us, and start holding us back.

Here’s what’s possible when you start the unbecoming process:
• Excellence without perfectionism
• Kindness with boundaries
• Self-care that’s consistent, not occasional
• Letting go of what drains you, so you can return to who you really are

What’s something you want to let go of so you can be more authentically you?

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If you’re looking for support – feel free to reach out!
📞Phone: (626) 702 - 3485
💌Email: admin@centerforgrowthandconnection.com

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Address

301 E. Colorado Boulevard , Suite 860
Pasadena, CA
91101

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About Michelle

Michelle Cantrell is a Licensed Professional Counselor in the state of Virginia. Michelle's areas of speciality are eating disorders, trauma, and unhealthy relationship patterns. In addition to her experience in treating eating disorders, Michelle is trained in Post-Induction Therapy for the treatment of developmental and relational trauma, and Eye Movement Desensitization and Reprocessing (EMDR). When working with couples, Michelle utilizes an Emotionally Focused Couples (EFT) approach. To contact Michelle, you can email her at mdc@michellecantrell.com or call 571-969-4393.

Disclaimer: This page is intended to be for informational purposes only. It is not intended to be a substitute for mental health services. If you wish to contact Michelle, please do so by emailing or calling. Messages posted through Facebook are not confidential and may not be responded to in a timely manner.