11/27/2025
Thank you to Misha Brown for sharing this unflinching reflection about misogyny and violence against women: "I am BEGGING men on the internet to stop proving women’s point every single day. A woman named Amber Czech was brutally murdered, not died in an accident, not passed peacefully, murdered. By a man who openly admitted he didn’t like her and had been fantasizing about hurting her. That is terrifying. That is the exact nightmare women talk about when they say they don’t feel safe around certain men.
And instead of grappling with the horror of that, instead of asking why a man can plan violence and somehow still be charged with second degree murder, I’ve seen men online berating women with 'not all men' even though this is what happens.
I have seen men with more plaque on their teeth than Simone Biles has on her walls respond with, 'SHORT HAIR MUST BE A LE***AN' 'SHE LOOKS MASCULINE' 'SHE SHOULD HAVE CHOSEN THE BEAR THEN'
Are you actually kidding me?
We have reached a level of misogyny so deep that some men are out here treating a woman’s haircut like an invitation to dehumanize her, even after death. The sheer lack of empathy required to mock a murdered woman because she didn’t fit in their version of 'acceptable femininity' is astounding.
Let’s be real. He didn’t kill her because she had short hair. He killed her because he hates women.
But these other men in the comments pretend this about a hairstyle because they don’t want to confront the reality that women are right to be afraid. Because they’d have to examine themselves. All of the jokes they laughed at, behavior they excused and entitlement they were raised on. So they project it onto Amber’s appearance.
What’s even more pathetic is that their masculinity is so fragile that they are triggered by women who don’t dress to impress them, or try to please them, or don’t care what they think.
Amber Czech was a real person. She had a life and people who loved her. She deserved to be safe and her job. She deserves respect before and after death.
And if any men see this and don’t appreciate this rant... go grow that patchy beard... apparently appearance is so important." -- via Dontcrossagayman
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On November 11, 20-year-old welder Amber Czech was killed at her workstation at Advanced Process Technologies in Minnesota after a 40-year-old coworker, David Bruce Delong, attacked her with a sledgehammer. He later told investigators he "didn't like her" and had been planning to kill her for some time. He has been charged with second-degree murder -- the fastest way to hold him in custody -- while the prosecutor evaluates upgrading the charge to first-degree premeditated murder.
Amber graduated from Alexandria Technical & Community College's welding program last year. On her days off, she taught welding at her former high school. Her family described her as hardworking, witty, and full of life. Her death has sparked national outrage and renewed calls from tradeswomen for better protections in male-dominated workplaces. As Sarah Kotzen of NAWIC-Metro Denver wrote: "She deserved safety. She deserved a future. She deserved to go home and she didn't."
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While cases like Amber Czech's are devastating, women are far more likely to be killed by an intimate partner or ex-partner than by a stranger or coworker.
For a potentially life-saving book for adults about the early warning signs of abusive relationships, myths about abusive personalities, and how to get help, we also recommend "Why Does He Do That?: Inside the Minds of Angry and Controlling Men" at https://www.amightygirl.com/why-does-he-do-that
Lundy Bancroft is the author of several related titles, including "Should I Stay or Should I Go?" (https://amzn.to/31zPCmw), "Daily Wisdom for Why Does He Do That?" (https://amzn.to/31ECpZq), and "The Joyous Recovery: A New Approach to Emotional Healing and Wellness" (https://amzn.to/2MEnx9g)
He also wrote a parenting book focused on helping children who have witnessed abuse, "When Dad Hurts Mom," at https://amzn.to/32JTJhi
If you’re a parent concerned that your daughter may be in an unhealthy relationship, check out the books “Saving Beauty From The Beast: How to Protect Your Daughter from an Unhealthy Relationship” (https://www.amightygirl.com/saving-beauty-from-the-beast) and “But I Love Him: Protecting Your Teen Daughter from Controlling, Abusive Relationships” (https://www.amightygirl.com/but-i-love-him)
Misha Brown is the author of the upcoming book "Be Your Own Bestie: A No-Nonsense Guide to Changing the Way You Treat Yourself" at https://amzn.to/4ilKUSh
