12/18/2025
90% of children with complex trauma will be misdiagnosed.
Ninety. Percent.
They’ve been starved, neglected, screamed at, abandoned, assaulted.
They’ve learned to survive in chaos, to shut down or explode, to mask pain with anger or silence.
And the system looks at that and says:
ODD.
ADHD.
Bipolar.
Attachment disorder.
Conduct disorder.
Oppositional.
Defiant.
Manipulative.
But where in that stack of diagnoses is the label: traumatized child?
Where is the note that says:
“Has never felt safe.”
“Doesn’t know what trust is.”
“Has been failed by every adult in their life and is still trying.”
Where is the grace?
Where is the context?
Because if you spent your whole childhood learning that love disappears and food isn’t guaranteed and pain comes from the people who are supposed to protect you—
You’d probably flinch at affection, too.
You’d probably hoard snacks, lie before you’re accused, and test every limit just to see if this time, finally, someone walks away.
And yet instead of healing, we pathologize.
Instead of understanding, we medicate.
Instead of support, we label.
This is why I fight.
Why I advocate.
Why I read the case files and ask the hard questions and say, “What happened to them?” before I ever ask, “What’s wrong with them?”
Because 90% of kids in care are carrying pain misread as personality.
And they deserve more than a diagnosis.
They deserve to be seen.
